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Guest Gupt_Lady

WJKK WJKF, 

Sangat ji, I’m seeking guidance regarding marital planning.

Sangat ji, please don’t mind this, but I’m a sehajdhari (cut hair) asking for advice. With all due respect, ‘No dating’ doesn’t apply to me. 

I’m from gta/Toronto, in my late 20s. I didn’t have brown neighbours/classmates growing up. Fast forward to today, I still live where I never see Punjabis. I just need to know how I should go about meeting a man. How do people like me, in the late 20s, find a suitable Punjabi match these days? I even went through matrimonial sections of newspapers my mom got for me. (All the men look for “a traditional, family-oriented woman”, & the men never describe themselves as family-oriented, but that’s a topic for another day.) 

I broke off an engagement because my partner became agnostic. Although I’m just a sehajdhari moni (cut hair) & seldom drink, I’m still spiritual and I wish God pairs me up with a man who will value what I value, like being vegetarian, being humble, being outdoors, and doing seva at the Gurdwara.. But these points (except vegetarian part) aren’t listed in the mens’ matrimonial entries. My mom suggested I do sevaa at the Gurdwara to pick out a respectable man there, but that shouldn’t be my focus at the Gurdwara. 

I guess my question is.. How should I go about meeting Punjabi sikhs/sehajdhari with marriage as the goal? I’d rather not read anymore sexist matrimonial entries lol. 

I’m open to everyone’s respectable suggestions. 

My fellow Toronto folk, let me know. 

* [Sehajdhari -meaning I accept Sikhi as my dharam but just don’t have kes (kept hair).] 

Thanks for your patience. 

WJJK WJKF

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Guest Milk Washed

I would be careful marring a brown person because you grew up in a white neighborhood. If you don't like lets say Bhangra then you are not qualified to be married into the Indian Tradition. Take if from me. I wanted to marry a white but due to strict father I had to marry someone from India. I enjoy Gurbani as well as Rock because it blends me in with my friends who are completely White. I became estranged with my family but recently I went to my School Reunion and my smile was out of this world. It was something I have been seeking from this world. Then I went to a concert with Celine Dion it was so enjoyable and all I can say is I found my happiness. I would think deep before you take that step looking for a Punjabi Male. 

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Guest Gupt_Lady
8 hours ago, Guest Milk Washed said:

I would be careful marring a brown person because you grew up in a white neighborhood. If you don't like lets say Bhangra then you are not qualified to be married into the Indian Tradition. Take if from me. I wanted to marry a white but due to strict father I had to marry someone from India. I enjoy Gurbani as well as Rock because it blends me in with my friends who are completely White. I became estranged with my family but recently I went to my School Reunion and my smile was out of this world. It was something I have been seeking from this world. Then I went to a concert with Celine Dion it was so enjoyable and all I can say is I found my happiness. I would think deep before you take that step looking for a Punjabi Male. 

Your trolling isn’t even entertaining @Milk_Washed 

Growing up around white people made me cherish the good parts of Punjabi culture, and made me appreciate how much our Punjabi parents put up with things that are considered unthinkable in Punjab, example being of a girl just going to the movies with her girlfriends after sundown. Also, there are unlimited amounts of sarcasm, insults, & tummy-hurting moments while speaking Punjabi. I’d like to keep that in my home. 

@Milk Washed    It also made me realize how rude and judgemental we can be. You had a preference for a white person, good for you. Doesn’t mean I should want a white. I’d rather go with someone who understands my culture in a better manner than most, making journeys even smoother. 

And if it’s a white Sehajdhari sikh, I’d consider it, but I’d still probably go with a Punjabi Sehajdhari because there is a stronger foundation to connect from. 

Just would’ve liked to know how people go about it these days, with all innocence attached. 

I’ll just go to events I guess..

WJJK WJKF

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On 10/12/2017 at 5:45 AM, Guest Gupt_Lady said:

WJKK WJKF, 

Sangat ji, I’m seeking guidance regarding marital planning.

Sangat ji, please don’t mind this, but I’m a sehajdhari (cut hair) asking for advice. With all due respect, ‘No dating’ doesn’t apply to me. 

I’m from gta/Toronto, in my late 20s. I didn’t have brown neighbours/classmates growing up. Fast forward to today, I still live where I never see Punjabis. I just need to know how I should go about meeting a man. How do people like me, in the late 20s, find a suitable Punjabi match these days? I even went through matrimonial sections of newspapers my mom got for me. (All the men look for “a traditional, family-oriented woman”, & the men never describe themselves as family-oriented, but that’s a topic for another day.) 

I broke off an engagement because my partner became agnostic. Although I’m just a sehajdhari moni (cut hair) & seldom drink, I’m still spiritual and I wish God pairs me up with a man who will value what I value, like being vegetarian, being humble, being outdoors, and doing seva at the Gurdwara.. But these points (except vegetarian part) aren’t listed in the mens’ matrimonial entries. My mom suggested I do sevaa at the Gurdwara to pick out a respectable man there, but that shouldn’t be my focus at the Gurdwara. 

I guess my question is.. How should I go about meeting Punjabi sikhs/sehajdhari with marriage as the goal? I’d rather not read anymore sexist matrimonial entries lol. 

I’m open to everyone’s respectable suggestions. 

My fellow Toronto folk, let me know. 

* [Sehajdhari -meaning I accept Sikhi as my dharam but just don’t have kes (kept hair).] 

Thanks for your patience. 

WJJK WJKF

Join sikh organizations in ur university, u will meet sikh ppl. 

Also if there is no solution create one. Im sure lots of married age ppl r going through this in the west.

One solution is to have panjabi speed dating get togethers. Look on this forum for adverts posters for this as it common in the UK. So ppl who are serious abt marriage come to this event to meet other ppl serious abt marriage.

You can also join dating/ marriage websites. They will have more info then the newspaper adds. Theres lots of them. Khalsa Rishtai, shaadi.com, akj matrimonial site....google them. If u dont think they relate to u. Perhaps create one with the base u need: canadian sehajdhari sikhs

 

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