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SikhInTheMaking

Seeking a friend

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Hi everyone, 

I know that this is not a networking site but im not sure where else to go or how else to go about this. Im basically a 28 year old guy trying to get away from a bad crowd and grow closer to sikhi and want to get involved in doing more seva. I guess im just looking for someone whos willing to help and give advice on my current situation as I literally have no one to talk to. My current crowd would laugh at me if they seen this lol

Rather than writing about all my problems on here and asking for advice, I thought I would just post this and anyone whos willing to help me can just drop me a message. I really dont know where else to go to make fellow sikh friends who will help me in my journey to sikhi

Anything you can do is appreciated, even if its a general talk please feel free to drop me a message and ask about my situation 

Thanks

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Guest Jacfsing2   
Guest Jacfsing2

You didn't mention where your from, I assume some places with lots of Sikhs especially in the big cities would have some networking areas where you could meet-up.

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simran345    2,456
39 minutes ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

My current crowd would laugh at me if they seen this lol

Stuff the current crowd, that’s what I say. Focus on what you want, otherwise you’ll never get away from those thoughts. 

You can share what you wish on here. There’s loads of people on here in the same boat as you bro, don’t worry. Most people are helpful on here. 

37 minutes ago, Jacfsing2 said:

You didn't mention where your from, I assume some places with lots of Sikhs especially in the big cities would have some networking areas where you could meet-up.

He’s from UK. 

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singhbj singh    1,175
52 minutes ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

Hi everyone, 

I know that this is not a networking site but im not sure where else to go or how else to go about this. Im basically a 28 year old guy trying to get away from a bad crowd and grow closer to sikhi and want to get involved in doing more seva. I guess im just looking for someone whos willing to help and give advice on my current situation as I literally have no one to talk to. My current crowd would laugh at me if they seen this lol

Rather than writing about all my problems on here and asking for advice, I thought I would just post this and anyone whos willing to help me can just drop me a message. I really dont know where else to go to make fellow sikh friends who will help me in my journey to sikhi

Anything you can do is appreciated, even if its a general talk please feel free to drop me a message and ask about my situation 

Thanks

Waheguru ji ka khalsa 

Waheguru ji ki fateh 

If you are single, best option is to get married.

Late twenties is right age to marry & start a family not for making friends.

Find someone whose willing & compatible.

Both of you can do Sangat & Seva (live n learn together).

Waheguru ji ka khalsa 

Waheguru ji ki fateh 

 

 

 

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Thanks for the responses everyone, feels good to finally have people to talk to and people willing to help 

 

Im from Nottingham, im unaware of any networking/Seva events here, I think the closest one to me that I know of is Midlands Seva in Birmingham which is a bit of a mission 

 

11 minutes ago, singhbj singh said:

Waheguru ji ka khalsa 

Waheguru ji ki fateh 

If you are single, best option is to get married.

Late twenties is right age to marry & start a family not for making friends.

Find someone whose willing & compatible.

Both of you can do Sangat & Seva (live n learn together).

Waheguru ji ka khalsa 

Waheguru ji ki fateh 

 

 

 

 

In regards to getting married, I was introduced to someone earlier this year and I felt like it was going somewhere. She was an amazing person and I was happy that I could see a future with her. Over the space of a few months my feelings developed massively for her which I still dont understand how it happened lol but she changed her mind, she decided she didnt want to take it any further and to be honest im crushed about that too. I think about her all the time and I dont think im ready to move on yet. Im old enough to realise that I cant change the situation so have been trying to accept and get on with my life but at the moment im really hurting. This is one of the reasons I want to get involved in seva, I feel as if my karma is bad and I need to give something back 

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simran345    2,456

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Guest Sangat   
Guest Sangat
7 hours ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

Hi everyone, 

I know that this is not a networking site but im not sure where else to go or how else to go about this. Im basically a 28 year old guy trying to get away from a bad crowd and grow closer to sikhi and want to get involved in doing more seva. I guess im just looking for someone whos willing to help and give advice on my current situation as I literally have no one to talk to. My current crowd would laugh at me if they seen this lol

Rather than writing about all my problems on here and asking for advice, I thought I would just post this and anyone whos willing to help me can just drop me a message. I really dont know where else to go to make fellow sikh friends who will help me in my journey to sikhi

Anything you can do is appreciated, even if its a general talk please feel free to drop me a message and ask about my situation 

Thanks

Yeah I understand. I don't trustany of my friends, every single one of them has stabbed me in the back bar one, who lives in another country.

 

My family is the same, all backstabbing.

Sangats important, but don't forget that humans can turn any minute and very suddenly, its usually each for themself when push comes to shove.

Which is why the Gurus Said that they have no friends or family except God.

Find Good souls to be friends with, they're needles in a haystack but ask and believe and they'll likely come to you. If not, u always have Him.

 

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singhbj singh    1,175
10 hours ago, simran345 said:

 Brides de muh nai disde 😂. They all blurred 😋

Once you become a member they would be visible.

This option is provided to discourage non-serious viewers.

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Guest Kaur   
Guest Kaur

Well tbh im in the same boat. Most of the people I know are not religious at all. I came here because I also wanted to learn more about my religion. All i can say is that dont feel guilty or ashamed that you're trying to improve your life. There is still so much that I dont know but im slowly trying to become an honest and true sikh .Better late than never is what I say. 

Btw what first made you feel like you needed to come on this forum, was it just about this girl ? 

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Guest Happy guy   
Guest Happy guy

That’s the only reason i m 28 nd never introduced to any girl, no tension no phn calls no msg, i m a free person lol

more time to do simran and bhagti

🤓😂

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22 hours ago, Guest Kaur said:

Btw what first made you feel like you needed to come on this forum, was it just about this girl ? 

Nah ive been on this site for a few years now. I originally came on because I was in a bad place, going out all the time getting up to no good and I thought something has to change. I came on here for advice and stuff and it helped me grow closer to sikhi but over the past few years I keep drifting apart. I find myself back on here when I turn bad again. Im not as bad as I used to be and have made changes but im still far from where I want to be.... this time round it was a number of things that made me come back on here. I noticed myself slipping into bad habits again and then the thing with this girl sort of fueled it - I thought my life was finally sorted after meeting her but it feels like my luck in life is crap so I came back on here to keep faith help me keep going

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Guest kaur   
Guest kaur
1 hour ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

Nah ive been on this site for a few years now. I originally came on because I was in a bad place, going out all the time getting up to no good and I thought something has to change. I came on here for advice and stuff and it helped me grow closer to sikhi but over the past few years I keep drifting apart. I find myself back on here when I turn bad again. Im not as bad as I used to be and have made changes but im still far from where I want to be.... this time round it was a number of things that made me come back on here. I noticed myself slipping into bad habits again and then the thing with this girl sort of fueled it - I thought my life was finally sorted after meeting her but it feels like my luck in life is crap so I came back on here to keep faith help me keep going

I can understand to an extent. There are times when I literally feel like leaving the country just so i can get away and start fresh. The fact that you feel that you have made improvements just shows that you are slowly becoming the person you want to be. However, you shouldnt be going out all night doing whatever. Just think to yourself when you finally do get engaged and married how will your wife feel knowing that her husband has been going out doing all kinds of things. Thats probably the one thing that has always stopped me from doing things i would regret. You need to really consider your future. At the same time, i can understand that making up excuses can be difficult. Just cut your friends off. It sounds harsh but do it. You dont need that kind of company. 

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17 hours ago, Guest kaur said:

I can understand to an extent. There are times when I literally feel like leaving the country just so i can get away and start fresh. The fact that you feel that you have made improvements just shows that you are slowly becoming the person you want to be. However, you shouldnt be going out all night doing whatever. Just think to yourself when you finally do get engaged and married how will your wife feel knowing that her husband has been going out doing all kinds of things. Thats probably the one thing that has always stopped me from doing things i would regret. You need to really consider your future. At the same time, i can understand that making up excuses can be difficult. Just cut your friends off. It sounds harsh but do it. You dont need that kind of company. 

I totally agree. I’m starting this by going gurdwara more often. If I explained that to my friends they would think I gone paagal or be laughing at me. I guess there not true friends. Rather than encouraging and supporting they sit there and take the P lol I’m not really bothered about what they want think anymore. The most difficult part for me is explaining why I’m not coming out when they ring. Going to the actual gurdwara is easy because I enjoy it and want to do it 

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Guest Kaur   
Guest Kaur

Its good that you are making changes. I just hope nobody holds your past against you and that your future wife and family can accept your past because not all girls can accept somebody who makes mistakes. Im not trying to make you feel bad but its like thay saying:  A mistake is once but if you keep doing it then it becomes a choice.  

I think as long as you keep making the right choices and have a bit of dignity and respect then you will be fine. 

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