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Hi everyone, 

I know that this is not a networking site but im not sure where else to go or how else to go about this. Im basically a 28 year old guy trying to get away from a bad crowd and grow closer to sikhi and want to get involved in doing more seva. I guess im just looking for someone whos willing to help and give advice on my current situation as I literally have no one to talk to. My current crowd would laugh at me if they seen this lol

Rather than writing about all my problems on here and asking for advice, I thought I would just post this and anyone whos willing to help me can just drop me a message. I really dont know where else to go to make fellow sikh friends who will help me in my journey to sikhi

Anything you can do is appreciated, even if its a general talk please feel free to drop me a message and ask about my situation 

Thanks

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Guest Jacfsing2

You didn't mention where your from, I assume some places with lots of Sikhs especially in the big cities would have some networking areas where you could meet-up.

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39 minutes ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

My current crowd would laugh at me if they seen this lol

Stuff the current crowd, that’s what I say. Focus on what you want, otherwise you’ll never get away from those thoughts. 

You can share what you wish on here. There’s loads of people on here in the same boat as you bro, don’t worry. Most people are helpful on here. 

37 minutes ago, Jacfsing2 said:

You didn't mention where your from, I assume some places with lots of Sikhs especially in the big cities would have some networking areas where you could meet-up.

He’s from UK. 

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52 minutes ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

Hi everyone, 

I know that this is not a networking site but im not sure where else to go or how else to go about this. Im basically a 28 year old guy trying to get away from a bad crowd and grow closer to sikhi and want to get involved in doing more seva. I guess im just looking for someone whos willing to help and give advice on my current situation as I literally have no one to talk to. My current crowd would laugh at me if they seen this lol

Rather than writing about all my problems on here and asking for advice, I thought I would just post this and anyone whos willing to help me can just drop me a message. I really dont know where else to go to make fellow sikh friends who will help me in my journey to sikhi

Anything you can do is appreciated, even if its a general talk please feel free to drop me a message and ask about my situation 

Thanks

Waheguru ji ka khalsa 

Waheguru ji ki fateh 

If you are single, best option is to get married.

Late twenties is right age to marry & start a family not for making friends.

Find someone whose willing & compatible.

Both of you can do Sangat & Seva (live n learn together).

Waheguru ji ka khalsa 

Waheguru ji ki fateh 

 

 

 

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Guest Sangat
7 hours ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

Hi everyone, 

I know that this is not a networking site but im not sure where else to go or how else to go about this. Im basically a 28 year old guy trying to get away from a bad crowd and grow closer to sikhi and want to get involved in doing more seva. I guess im just looking for someone whos willing to help and give advice on my current situation as I literally have no one to talk to. My current crowd would laugh at me if they seen this lol

Rather than writing about all my problems on here and asking for advice, I thought I would just post this and anyone whos willing to help me can just drop me a message. I really dont know where else to go to make fellow sikh friends who will help me in my journey to sikhi

Anything you can do is appreciated, even if its a general talk please feel free to drop me a message and ask about my situation 

Thanks

Yeah I understand. I don't trustany of my friends, every single one of them has stabbed me in the back bar one, who lives in another country.

 

My family is the same, all backstabbing.

Sangats important, but don't forget that humans can turn any minute and very suddenly, its usually each for themself when push comes to shove.

Which is why the Gurus Said that they have no friends or family except God.

Find Good souls to be friends with, they're needles in a haystack but ask and believe and they'll likely come to you. If not, u always have Him.

 

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10 hours ago, simran345 said:

 Brides de muh nai disde 😂. They all blurred 😋

Once you become a member they would be visible.

This option is provided to discourage non-serious viewers.

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Guest Kaur

Well tbh im in the same boat. Most of the people I know are not religious at all. I came here because I also wanted to learn more about my religion. All i can say is that dont feel guilty or ashamed that you're trying to improve your life. There is still so much that I dont know but im slowly trying to become an honest and true sikh .Better late than never is what I say. 

Btw what first made you feel like you needed to come on this forum, was it just about this girl ? 

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Guest Happy guy

That’s the only reason i m 28 nd never introduced to any girl, no tension no phn calls no msg, i m a free person lol

more time to do simran and bhagti

🤓😂

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Guest kaur
1 hour ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

Nah ive been on this site for a few years now. I originally came on because I was in a bad place, going out all the time getting up to no good and I thought something has to change. I came on here for advice and stuff and it helped me grow closer to sikhi but over the past few years I keep drifting apart. I find myself back on here when I turn bad again. Im not as bad as I used to be and have made changes but im still far from where I want to be.... this time round it was a number of things that made me come back on here. I noticed myself slipping into bad habits again and then the thing with this girl sort of fueled it - I thought my life was finally sorted after meeting her but it feels like my luck in life is crap so I came back on here to keep faith help me keep going

I can understand to an extent. There are times when I literally feel like leaving the country just so i can get away and start fresh. The fact that you feel that you have made improvements just shows that you are slowly becoming the person you want to be. However, you shouldnt be going out all night doing whatever. Just think to yourself when you finally do get engaged and married how will your wife feel knowing that her husband has been going out doing all kinds of things. Thats probably the one thing that has always stopped me from doing things i would regret. You need to really consider your future. At the same time, i can understand that making up excuses can be difficult. Just cut your friends off. It sounds harsh but do it. You dont need that kind of company. 

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Guest Kaur

Its good that you are making changes. I just hope nobody holds your past against you and that your future wife and family can accept your past because not all girls can accept somebody who makes mistakes. Im not trying to make you feel bad but its like thay saying:  A mistake is once but if you keep doing it then it becomes a choice.  

I think as long as you keep making the right choices and have a bit of dignity and respect then you will be fine. 

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3 hours ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

I guess there not true friends. Rather than encouraging and supporting they sit there and take the P lol I’m not really bothered about what they want think anymore. The most difficult part for me is explaining why I’m not coming out when they ring.

They don’t understand why you are changing, but still it’s wrong for them to behave like this. It’s because they can’t see past what they think is “normal”. And they’re probably afraid of change themselves and losing a member of the group who they get confidence from. But why should you carry on feeding their confidence, when you need to help yourself first. 

Many friends may come and go, but don’t waste your life on something you don’t want to do just for the sake of it. You never know, they may start to think about themselves too, once you let go of that way of life. You can still be friends, but just have different lifestyles, just don’t become enemies with anybody in the process. It’s good you’re not bothered about them anymore, this  shows the change that’s taking place on a positive note. 

When somebody calls and I don’t want to do something or talk, I don’t answer it 😀.  Just let the call go to voicemail and listen to it in your own time when you’re ready to. This way, you won’t be pressured into making a decision. 

3 hours ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

Going to the actual gurdwara is easy because I enjoy it and want to do it 

Because you want to do it, is what matters. And that’s what’s going to help you. 

Guest Kaur is right, do you really want to be around those that keep dragging you down? She’s said some good things about your future. 

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Guest Kaur
2 hours ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

Totally agree and I understand if someone cant accept the mistakes ive made. I would find it difficult if it was the other way round 

Yeah Im no angel but I dont think I could except it if my future husband had been with other girls just because I dont go around doing stuff like that. But I know way too many boys and girls that just go round doing what they like and the worst thing is nobody cares and they get married soo easily. I am surprised that you have not found somebody yourself especially if you go out and about. 

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Guest Kaur
20 minutes ago, SikhInTheMaking said:

I used to always be out and about but ive never been that type of guy. Im not a very confident person in that manner so I havent been able to meet anyone in that way. Im trying to keep faith in waheguru and just hoping it will happen when he wants it to - I really hope he doesnt want me to be alone forever lol but what will be, will be 

Yeh I agree. When the timing is right it will happen.  Its just a waiting game. A really annoying irritating and frustrating wait.  I hope this girl you have fallen for changes her mind. You sound like a nice decent person despite the fact that you have made mistakes. 

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