Guest followthelight

Amritvela with a roommate not wanting to inconvenience

116 posts in this topic

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

PROBLEM CONTEXT

I am living/ working in a country for a few months where there are no Sikhs, let alone a Gurudwara. I've tried contacting via FB etc, there is no sangat near me. My team is nice, we get along fine. 

I do not at all feel even the slightest temptation to drink alcohol, touch meat (vegertarian options without egg are so scarce here), have relationships with other travellers or remove my body hair (even though it is 50 degrees heat and everyone is wearing singlets and shorts going to the beach). I know this is all Guru Ji's help. 2 years ago I was drinking and vomiting in toilets, having sex with strangers, removing as much body hair as I could and thinking i was a 'spiritual person' I know I've been addicted to alcohol, cannabis, MDMA and the fact I have no desire now isn't something I am capable of- this is Guru Ji's working.

THE PROBLEM

I'm really starting to miss my Amritvela. I used to so freely wake up, shower, do simran and nitnem and not worry. now I have to worry about so many things with my roommate, especially as she sleeps so late. Even though I don't complain of her sleeping late (perhaps I should, tactfully?) she will say things like "I couldn't sleep because I heard your alarm so I've been up since very early." This makes me feel super guilty. 

Extra guilty because I'm so TIRED that I don't even remember hearing the alarm myself or turning it off... I DONT WAKE UP AT AMRITVELA. 

i end up waking up around 5.30-6am so amritvela is long-gone. 

Since my time being here, I've only once had the chance to do amritvela freely, and that is when everyone had gone out drinking/ clubbing for the night and came home late. 

When I do my nitnem I don't say it aloud because she is always in the room (and a different faith so i don't want to ever feel like I'm forcing or invading personal space). But man. I miss doing simran aloud- feeling my throat muscles saying Waheguru and closing my eyes so my ears could hear my body speak Waheguru. Be grateful to Waheguru for allowing my body, my lips to be blessed with the beauty of their Naam. The sweetness in my mouth, the warmth of the love but the cool breeze of peace settling in my head, sinking into my heart...anyway Imma get senti real quick lol. So please. I understand my current situation is resultant of karams from this life and previous. But I want help in improving my new karams that I'm (not) earning every moment. How do I wake up at Amritvela?

Need help with how to 

1. Ask to turn lights off earlier because I can't sleep until ALL lights are off (which doesn't happen till around 11pm)

2. Shower without feeling guilty about making noise and waking her up too early

3. Sing Gurbani aloud. I'm scared I'll get into a bad habit if I keep doing this and become lazy in the future. 

And any other advice you could offer would be highly appreciated 

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To OP, how long are you there for? It's not an ideal environment to be in, but the questions you've asked on here, maybe you could ask them instead. Explain about being a Sikh and what your daily routine is. The alarm going off is going to disturb anybody asleep if they don't normally get up at that time. Have the alarm on silent mode, but you won't get up then, as its already not working. Can you not get a room on your own? 

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On 8/3/2017 at 4:41 PM, Guest followthelight said:

2 years ago I was drinking and vomiting in toilets, having sex with strangers, removing as much body hair as I could and thinking i was a 'spiritual person' I know I've been addicted to alcohol, cannabis, MDMA and the fact I have no desire now isn't something I am capable of- this is Guru Ji's working.

If you're female, watch out for all this. Lots of alcohol isn't processed well by the female body and can have serious enduring effects in a relatively short time. Plus being off your head in public is a guaranteed way of attracting predators directly towards you - with all that entails....

As Simran345 suggested, try getting your own room if possible but don't slip back to old behaviours once no one is watching you. 

Edited by dallysingh101
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2 hours ago, simran345 said:

To OP, how long are you there for? It's not an ideal environment to be in, but the questions you've asked on here, maybe you could ask them instead. Explain about being a Sikh and what your daily routine is. The alarm going off is going to disturb anybody asleep if they don't normally get up at that time. Have the alarm on silent mode, but you won't get up then, as its already not working. Can you not get a room on your own? 

What's OP?

I wish I could have my own room haha, everything would be much easier. It's just expensive, considering I'm staying for another approx 2 months. Plus it feels like I'm avoiding the situation at hand? (Learning to put Sikhi first, learning to communicate ?) 

and dallysingh101 agreed... I just learnt that the hard/ longer way. #egoprobs 

 

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I was going to say, if you're having problems waking before 6, you should sleep at 8 or 9, and easily wake up 6-7 hours later, making it between 2 and 4.

But then you say your roommate doesn't turn the lights off till 11. I think that is highly unfair of her. If you wants to watch movies till 11, let her do so, on her iPad with earphones and the lights off. Most people prefer to watch movies in the dark, anyways.

Shower noise should only be a problem if she is an extremely light sleeper.

Assuming she drinks and eats meat, you might be able to say that you would never think to impose your religion on her, but equally, she should not seek to prevent you from practicing your own.

As for the speaking Gurbani out loud, I would say you shouldn't, as a reasonable accommodation to your roommate. But, you can listen to Gurbani on earphones while you're reading the text. There are Nitnem apps for that.

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Oh, one more point:

This should definitely prove all of you wrong who say, "Where does it say you can't marry a non-Sikh?"

It should be clear as day you can't really live in Sikh rehit when you live with a non-Sikh. You'd always be walking on eggshells, and be living two different lives, which is one thing for roommates, but not acceptable for husband and wife, otherwise, why get married in the first place?

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First of all, that sangat will poison you, if not right now, later. Secondly about your AmritVela issue use a sleep calculator like www.SleepyTi.me. As for the rest I think other members have given good advice.

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Like many of the people here, I do recommend that you get a new roommate; or if that's not possible, you tell her straight-up that you have to wake-up early for religious reasons, usually people will try to be accommodating or will flat out give you the other advice of getting a new roommate who can accommodate you. The solution to showers is just make it as quick as possible. If you can't do Gurbani out loud try to listen to Gurbani on a device and repeat what they are saying quietly.

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5 hours ago, BhForce said:

Oh, one more point:

This should definitely prove all of you wrong who say, "Where does it say you can't marry a non-Sikh?"

It should be clear as day you can't really live in Sikh rehit when you live with a non-Sikh. You'd always be walking on eggshells, and be living two different lives, which is one thing for roommates, but not acceptable for husband and wife, otherwise, why get married in the first place?

I don't think comparing 2 people living each other to a married couple is either rational or beneficial. 

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1 hour ago, Jacfsing2 said:

I don't think comparing 2 people living each other to a married couple is either rational or beneficial. 

I think it's entirely rational and beneficial, brother.

But first, let me ask you if you think a Sikh can marry a non-Sikh, and we can go on from there. (I realize people can do anything they want--what I'm asking is if Guru Sahib wants us to do so.)

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7 hours ago, BhForce said:

I was going to say, if you're having problems waking before 6, you should sleep at 8 or 9, and easily wake up 6-7 hours later, making it between 2 and 4.

But then you say your roommate doesn't turn the lights off till 11. I think that is highly unfair of her. If you wants to watch movies till 11, let her do so, on her iPad with earphones and the lights off. Most people prefer to watch movies in the dark, anyways.

Shower noise should only be a problem if she is an extremely light sleeper.

Assuming she drinks and eats meat, you might be able to say that you would never think to impose your religion on her, but equally, she should not seek to prevent you from practicing your own.

As for the speaking Gurbani out loud, I would say you shouldn't, as a reasonable accommodation to your roommate. But, you can listen to Gurbani on earphones while you're reading the text. There are Nitnem apps for that.

She's an EXTREMELY light sleeper and will comment on waking up even if I leave the room in the morning/ go to bathroom/ breathe saying I woke her up.

Last night I was more assertive and asked to have lights off by 10 and she grudgingly was like yeah sure. I usually sleep at 8. 

I wanna make it clear she is a nice and accomodating person. From her perspective it is super inconvienient having a room mate with such a different timetable. 

from this advice I feel I should get some courage and "deal with it" haha and talk to her. &##$ blimey that stuff scares me kithe fasgi 😭😂 

And I agree I have been reflecting heaps from this experience about what values I would want my future husband to be, makes sense why amritdhari should marry amritdhari 

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1 hour ago, BhForce said:

I think it's entirely rational and beneficial, brother.

But first, let me ask you if you think a Sikh can marry a non-Sikh, and we can go on from there. (I realize people can do anything they want--what I'm asking is if Guru Sahib wants us to do so.)

I don't see what this has to do with the roommate issue, but no, I don't think it's recommended that Non-Sikhs marry Sikhs.

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On 03/08/2017 at 4:41 PM, Guest followthelight said:

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

PROBLEM CONTEXT

I am living/ working in a country for a few months where there are no Sikhs, let alone a Gurudwara. I've tried contacting via FB etc, there is no sangat near me. My team is nice, we get along fine. 

I do not at all feel even the slightest temptation to drink alcohol, touch meat (vegertarian options without egg are so scarce here), have relationships with other travellers or remove my body hair (even though it is 50 degrees heat and everyone is wearing singlets and shorts going to the beach). I know this is all Guru Ji's help. 2 years ago I was drinking and vomiting in toilets, having sex with strangers, removing as much body hair as I could and thinking i was a 'spiritual person' I know I've been addicted to alcohol, cannabis, MDMA and the fact I have no desire now isn't something I am capable of- this is Guru Ji's working.

THE PROBLEM

I'm really starting to miss my Amritvela. I used to so freely wake up, shower, do simran and nitnem and not worry. now I have to worry about so many things with my roommate, especially as she sleeps so late. Even though I don't complain of her sleeping late (perhaps I should, tactfully?) she will say things like "I couldn't sleep because I heard your alarm so I've been up since very early." This makes me feel super guilty. 

Extra guilty because I'm so TIRED that I don't even remember hearing the alarm myself or turning it off... I DONT WAKE UP AT AMRITVELA. 

i end up waking up around 5.30-6am so amritvela is long-gone. 

Since my time being here, I've only once had the chance to do amritvela freely, and that is when everyone had gone out drinking/ clubbing for the night and came home late. 

When I do my nitnem I don't say it aloud because she is always in the room (and a different faith so i don't want to ever feel like I'm forcing or invading personal space). But man. I miss doing simran aloud- feeling my throat muscles saying Waheguru and closing my eyes so my ears could hear my body speak Waheguru. Be grateful to Waheguru for allowing my body, my lips to be blessed with the beauty of their Naam. The sweetness in my mouth, the warmth of the love but the cool breeze of peace settling in my head, sinking into my heart...anyway Imma get senti real quick lol. So please. I understand my current situation is resultant of karams from this life and previous. But I want help in improving my new karams that I'm (not) earning every moment. How do I wake up at Amritvela?

Need help with how to 

1. Ask to turn lights off earlier because I can't sleep until ALL lights are off (which doesn't happen till around 11pm)

2. Shower without feeling guilty about making noise and waking her up too early

3. Sing Gurbani aloud. I'm scared I'll get into a bad habit if I keep doing this and become lazy in the future. 

And any other advice you could offer would be highly appreciated 

It's a really interesting issue you have raised.. I think your instincts to not impose your practices upon another and cause them undue inconvenience is absolutely in keeping with Sikh traditions! I think just for this reason you should be very happy and recognise that this is the embodiment of satnam.. And you are truly keeping satnam at the centre of your heart.. Having this consciousness is more important than amrit vela ablutions becoming ritualistic. I commend you on your empathy.. I don't think you should feel any guilt whatsoever your being harsh on yourself! 

You obviously get a lot of peace from naam Jaap simran /nitnem  at amrit vela.. There probably are a number of practical ways to address your current predicament.. 

I think you can separate some of the issues out those which are related to your personal spiritual needs and those which are to do with sharing a common space with a room mate. 

1. I think it is perfectly reasonable and normal to ask your roommate to have lights out by at the latest 11pm. 

2. Getting up to shower at whichever time you need to is your prerogative and not really something your roommate should take issue with. Obviously you should,  as I'm sure you do already, be as quiet as possible and not unduly inconvenience your roommate. 

3. I think until you can change your circumstances you should definitely exhaust all possible ways to sleep earlier to help you wake earlier.. Maybe try eye mask and ear plugs or phones.. It's worth a shot? 

4. Try achieving one thing at a time.. Getting to sleep to wake up at the time you want and build up from there. 

5. Speak to your roommate about your thoughts you may find they are sympathetic and will try and be considerate 

Your heart is in the right place don't be too hard on yourself and your respect for your roommate is a microcosm of the Sikh macro approach to the wider world. However it is a fine line if your room mate is behaving inappropriately then there are wider issues to address. 

Clearly you have been blessed with 'gurprasad'! You are lucky! It's not supposed to be easy.. If the way to be a good gursikh was as simple as 'ritualistically'  waking up at amrit vela, doing nitnem etc taking amrit etc then it wouldn't really be khoj 

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On 03/08/2017 at 4:41 PM, Guest followthelight said:

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

PROBLEM CONTEXT

I am living/ working in a country for a few months where there are no Sikhs, let alone a Gurudwara. I've tried contacting via FB etc, there is no sangat near me. My team is nice, we get along fine. 

I do not at all feel even the slightest temptation to drink alcohol, touch meat (vegertarian options without egg are so scarce here), have relationships with other travellers or remove my body hair (even though it is 50 degrees heat and everyone is wearing singlets and shorts going to the beach). I know this is all Guru Ji's help. 2 years ago I was drinking and vomiting in toilets, having sex with strangers, removing as much body hair as I could and thinking i was a 'spiritual person' I know I've been addicted to alcohol, cannabis, MDMA and the fact I have no desire now isn't something I am capable of- this is Guru Ji's working.

THE PROBLEM

I'm really starting to miss my Amritvela. I used to so freely wake up, shower, do simran and nitnem and not worry. now I have to worry about so many things with my roommate, especially as she sleeps so late. Even though I don't complain of her sleeping late (perhaps I should, tactfully?) she will say things like "I couldn't sleep because I heard your alarm so I've been up since very early." This makes me feel super guilty. 

Extra guilty because I'm so TIRED that I don't even remember hearing the alarm myself or turning it off... I DONT WAKE UP AT AMRITVELA. 

i end up waking up around 5.30-6am so amritvela is long-gone. 

Since my time being here, I've only once had the chance to do amritvela freely, and that is when everyone had gone out drinking/ clubbing for the night and came home late. 

When I do my nitnem I don't say it aloud because she is always in the room (and a different faith so i don't want to ever feel like I'm forcing or invading personal space). But man. I miss doing simran aloud- feeling my throat muscles saying Waheguru and closing my eyes so my ears could hear my body speak Waheguru. Be grateful to Waheguru for allowing my body, my lips to be blessed with the beauty of their Naam. The sweetness in my mouth, the warmth of the love but the cool breeze of peace settling in my head, sinking into my heart...anyway Imma get senti real quick lol. So please. I understand my current situation is resultant of karams from this life and previous. But I want help in improving my new karams that I'm (not) earning every moment. How do I wake up at Amritvela?

Need help with how to 

1. Ask to turn lights off earlier because I can't sleep until ALL lights are off (which doesn't happen till around 11pm)

2. Shower without feeling guilty about making noise and waking her up too early

3. Sing Gurbani aloud. I'm scared I'll get into a bad habit if I keep doing this and become lazy in the future. 

And any other advice you could offer would be highly appreciated 

ok ,

for a homeopathic seminar which lasted 2 weeks I had to roomshare with a white non-religious person, similar worries 

1. get an alarm on your watch which is  quiet or use vibrating silent alarm on phone

2. have your bathroom stuff sorted, preferably in the bathroom so you can make less noise in the room at morningtime.

3. sit on your made bed and do your nitnem quietly, maybe you could your Nitnem in the living room at that early time instead of the bedroom. (then you can sing gurbani)

4. why don't you get an eyemask to block out lights and earplugs if she is noisy

5. stop worrying , Rabb rakha

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Don't worry about anything - luckily you have come to the right place.

All you need to do is invite over jagsaw Singh from this forum, who in sure would be delighted to visit you and would have absolutely no problem waving his kirpan about in your room acting like a tw*t, and if your roommate asks any questions he will just make loads of crap up that will be almost entirely nonsensical. 

Your roommate will then be nice as pie. You could take a crap in the middle of the floor and she would say nothing as she would be grateful you were not in the same stratosphere of behvkoofi as jagsaw....

Wjkk wjkf

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Vaheguru ji ka khalsa vaheguru ji ki fateh.

I wish I had the same pyaas as you. You can go outside and do your nitnem, preferably at a local park. The only problem is the shower which if you think your roommate will have a problem then maybe get an 24/7 gym pass and go use the shower there. The only thing you gotta do is to wake up! 

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11 hours ago, Jacfsing2 said:

I don't see what this has to do with the roommate issue, but no, I don't think it's recommended that Non-Sikhs marry Sikhs.

 

OK, why should Sikhs not marry non-Sikhs? Yes, I know that you can say that it's a command of Guru Sahib, but the next question is what does that accomplish? E.g., there's a command to wear a kirpan, but then the next question is why? And we give the answer as self-defense. So why not marry non-Sikhs?

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Just now, BhForce said:

OK, why should Sikhs not marry non-Sikhs? Yes, I know that you can say that it's a command of Guru Sahib, but the next question is what does that accomplish? E.g., there's a command to wear a kirpan, but then the next question is why? And we give the answer as self-defense. So why not marry non-Sikhs?

I don't believe this applies to the roommate issue, but I believe the reason a Non-Sikh shouldn't marry a Sikh is due to lifestyles being completely different, and Sikhs are the best. 

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2 hours ago, Jacfsing2 said:

I don't believe this applies to the roommate issue, but I believe the reason a Non-Sikh shouldn't marry a Sikh is due to lifestyles being completely different, and Sikhs are the best. 

Right, which is what I said. What are we arguing about again?

My point was that if you can't live with a non-Sikh roommate for a couple of months and still keep your Sikh rehit, then how can you possibly live with a non-Sikh husband or wife for decades? Not to mention that the lack of agreement that you have regarding just your own lifestyles is multiplied when you have children, and then argue about what lifestyle they should lead. Do Japji Sahib and the rest of Nitnem in the morning? A 1-hour process. Or just a 30-second Christian Lord's Prayer?

18 hours ago, Jacfsing2 said:

I don't think comparing 2 people living each other to a married couple is either rational or beneficial. 

OK, the rational benefit to comparing roommates to married couples is to illustrate the need for a Sikh marriage partner, which I think I just did above, with help from you.

Finally, I don't know if by "compare" you mean only "illustrate the similarities", but Google and Oxford define compare to mean "note the similarity or dissimilarity".

P.S. If anyone thinks Sikhs can or should marry out, speak now or forever hold your peace.

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1 minute ago, BhForce said:

Right, which is what I said. What are we arguing about again?

 

 

We are arguing because you believe comparing a roommate is to a spouse is reasonable, while I still don't.

2 minutes ago, BhForce said:

 

My point was that if you can't live with a non-Sikh roommate for a couple of months and still keep your Sikh rehit, then how can you possibly live with a non-Sikh husband or wife for decades? 

I'd say most people can live as a same-gender, different worldviews lifestyle, a spouse; however is very different from a roommate, people tend to be different for roommates and the way they treat spouses. Whereas I believe that people of incompatible lifestyles can't marry, I don't believe the same for roommates. All in all, there will be situations where it will be near impossible to find Amritdhari roommates.

7 minutes ago, BhForce said:

Not to mention that the lack of agreement that you have regarding just your own lifestyles is multiplied when you have children, and then argue about what lifestyle they should lead.

Usually if I would need a roommate, I'd honestly recommend same-gender, whereas for a spouse that should always be opposite gender, again comparing 2 unlike things. Also I don't really recommend people have sexual relations with roommates, whereas a spouse it's almost expected. Since you think the 2 are comparable, do you really think a spouse is just someone who happens to live with you?

11 minutes ago, BhForce said:

Do Japji Sahib and the rest of Nitnem in the morning? A 1-hour process. Or just a 30-second Christian Lord's Prayer?

If I had a Non-Sikh roommate and he wanted to pray to a monkey it wouldn't bother me at all, as long as I get to worship Vaheguru freely, but again for a spouse it's completely different.

14 minutes ago, BhForce said:

OK, the rational benefit to comparing roommates to married couples is to illustrate the need for a Sikh marriage partner, which I think I just did above, with help from you.

I don't think it's a rational comparison at all to be honest. 

16 minutes ago, BhForce said:

Finally, I don't know if by "compare" you mean only "illustrate the similarities", but Google and Oxford define compare to mean "note the similarity or dissimilarity".

With all due respect, the only similarity I got was between a spouse and roommate is they live with each other.

18 minutes ago, BhForce said:

P.S. If anyone thinks Sikhs can or should marry out, speak now or forever hold your peace.

Not something I'll debate, but if someone else does debate this topic, I'll be on your side.:waheguru:.

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On 04/08/2017 at 1:10 PM, Guest followthelight said:

What's OP?

Means original poster. 

 

23 hours ago, Guest Followthelight said:

blimey that stuff scares me kithe fasgi 😭😂 

Lol

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15 hours ago, BhForce said:

.S. If anyone thinks Sikhs can or should marry out, speak now or forever hold your peace.

I think Sikhs can marry whoever they like 

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On 05/08/2017 at 7:09 AM, Sukhvirk1976 said:

It's a really interesting issue you have raised.. I think your instincts to not impose your practices upon another and cause them undue inconvenience is absolutely in keeping with Sikh traditions! I think just for this reason you should be very happy and recognise that this is the embodiment of satnam.. And you are truly keeping satnam at the centre of your heart.. Having this consciousness is more important than amrit vela ablutions becoming ritualistic. I commend you on your empathy.. I don't think you should feel any guilt whatsoever your being harsh on yourself! 

You obviously get a lot of peace from naam Jaap simran /nitnem  at amrit vela.. There probably are a number of practical ways to address your current predicament.. 

I think you can separate some of the issues out those which are related to your personal spiritual needs and those which are to do with sharing a common space with a room mate. 

1. I think it is perfectly reasonable and normal to ask your roommate to have lights out by at the latest 11pm. 

2. Getting up to shower at whichever time you need to is your prerogative and not really something your roommate should take issue with. Obviously you should,  as I'm sure you do already, be as quiet as possible and not unduly inconvenience your roommate. 

3. I think until you can change your circumstances you should definitely exhaust all possible ways to sleep earlier to help you wake earlier.. Maybe try eye mask and ear plugs or phones.. It's worth a shot? 

4. Try achieving one thing at a time.. Getting to sleep to wake up at the time you want and build up from there. 

5. Speak to your roommate about your thoughts you may find they are sympathetic and will try and be considerate 

Your heart is in the right place don't be too hard on yourself and your respect for your roommate is a microcosm of the Sikh macro approach to the wider world. However it is a fine line if your room mate is behaving inappropriately then there are wider issues to address. 

Clearly you have been blessed with 'gurprasad'! You are lucky! It's not supposed to be easy.. If the way to be a good gursikh was as simple as 'ritualistically'  waking up at amrit vela, doing nitnem etc taking amrit etc then it wouldn't really be khoj 

OUTCOME

Thankyou , jkvlondon and guest singh and others for all your practical tips. 

Can't believe I didn't think about an eye mask, have been looking out for one since. I've been using an alarm on a watch; works so well!! 

24/7 Gym for shower is such a smart idea! but the earliest one here is 5am

We had a conversation and agreed to have lights out by 10pm. 

I'll be taking this opportunity to extend my Amritvela to earlier than usual, so that she is in deeper sleep when I am up (Thankyou Guru Ji for this opportunity )

It's been working for past few days, I feel much better now.

I've also been saying no to some social outings so I can have the room to myself and sing Waheguru aloud... Guru Ji hears all prayers and shows us the way

Thankyou Sangat Ji, I love you all <3 

 

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If I were you I would try and just find and isolated space away from that peticular roommate. your main worry is that she is not disturbed. perhaps at night leave the door just open enough for you to be able to get out. 

as for waking up. are you I a rhythm yet? if not would it be easier for you to stay awake to midnight then to armit vehli and sleep around 1:30am and just sleep in longer. 

as for the showers I guess you have to just be quiet ir find another bathroom in the building to shower in. or idk maybe shower afterwards idk

any safe place in which you dont disturb your roommate or other people in the community would be ideal. if there is a spare room, public foyer, backyard to where your staying?. if the weather is warm even a walk to a safe public place in, near or around where you are. im sure there is somewhere you could go where there is silence..

also is your roommate someone you will know for alongtime after this trip. if not you should just telk her you need to get up cause of religious purposes cause you dont need to explain yourself to every single person in your life. and if you will no her for along time after this trip then you will always have time to become friends and explain to her afterwards.

dont be too hard on yourself. guru ji knows and understands what your going through.

i wish i could helo more or suggest more but tbh there are alot of different ways you could make this work. just need to find one ayy. sorry about my rushed grammer im kinda studying for a maths test I have tomorrow that I so gonna fail in

 

PS: to all those people talking abg marriage, &lt;banned word filter activated&gt; has that got to do with anything in this issue hahaha. argue about it somewhere else. and only leave relevant helpful replys for this person plz

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On Sunday, August 06, 2017 at 2:40 AM, Sukhvirk1976 said:

I think Sikhs can marry whoever they like 

Out of curiousity,  are you one of those ppl that believe sikh means learner, so sikhs have no rules or rehits or restriction and only an obligation to go out and learn. Just learn it could be mathematics, poetry, learn pagean rituals, learn life cycle of beetles, just go learn?

Because from ur posts it seems like u believe sikh just means being a nice person.  

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