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Guest FirstTimeOnThisPage

SatSriAkal to everyone 

im a middle school student 

i had a question for you guys 

is it ok to have a crush on a girl in sikhi but not indulge in any kaam or desires?

Please forgive me if I said anything anything wrong as this is the first time I've been here

thx 

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On Sunday, July 09, 2017 at 1:21 AM, Guest FirstTimeOnThisPage said:

SatSriAkal to everyone 

im a middle school student 

i had a question for you guys 

is it ok to have a crush on a girl in sikhi but not indulge in any kaam or desires?

Please forgive me if I said anything anything wrong as this is the first time I've been here

thx 

Its certainly natural to have a crush, but is it ok? 

Well its natural to feel anger and want to punch someone, when they humiliate u, but is it ok? 

Its natural to want to get a high paying job in the wine industry, but is it ok?

Wat all of these things have in common is that they are of the panj chor, the five thieves: lust, anger, and greed. These are natural, they are our default mode. Everybody including animals are ruled by these desires/instincts. Criminals go too far, they either use force or go against the law to fulfill these desires But most ppl are ruled by these desires, and will do anything to follow them.

Guruji imagined a different, better human being and called him Sikh. Theres nothing wrong with wat you are doing, but nothing good either. You are just following the most basic, simple level of programming of your mind. If you want to achieve higher things in life and sikhi, you have to think higher, better, follow the upgraded level mindset. Which means think above the 5 chor.

Remember guruji says you will be judged on your actions, words, and thoughts. ਮਨ ਬਚ ਕਰਮ. And sikhs should try to have the most exemplary.

Also, guruji said to think of any girl who is not related to you as your mother, sister, or daughter depending on age.

A crush basically means you like that person. Ask yourself why. Most common reason is you admire them or you think theyredifferent or better. Ask yourself why. Because they have good qualities that i like. Either beauty, intelligence, style, kindness...etc

Watever that reason is that you like them for, train your mind to desire that quality instead. If its beauty, that person did not create it. Try to admire beauty everywhere, and be in awe of the creator of that beauty. Try to become beautiful, intelligent, confindent yourself. At this age, you should be trying to improve yourself.  Watever you like in someone else, try to adapt it yourself. Your goal should be to make yourself the best at everything, so that other people have crushes on you. Not that u go around having crushes on other ppl, wasting the best time ਜਵਾਨੀ of your life. 

Dont think badly of yourself for having a crush. Its natural, but arise above it. And make yourself have the good qualities  ( best looks, best style, most intelligent, great conversationalist, most religious, most calm, kind) that you cant find anyone good enough to have a crush on.😆 be the best sikh, best son of Guru Gobind Singh ji. 

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Guest Jacfsing2
On 7/9/2017 at 1:21 AM, Guest FirstTimeOnThisPage said:

SatSriAkal to everyone 

im a middle school student 

i had a question for you guys 

is it ok to have a crush on a girl in sikhi but not indulge in any kaam or desires?

Please forgive me if I said anything anything wrong as this is the first time I've been here

thx 

What do you want to hear? People telling you it's bad, good, the casual see everyone as your sibling, or do you want to know the truth about what is going on. The way I see this idea is that you like someone from afar or close. If you were asking from a side of perfection, (blessed Guru Sahib), then we all know the ideal we should reach is always never going to be perfect. 

Having crushes are natural, but if you asked that you wouldn't have any Kaam,(Kaam is the wanting for sexual relations, not just physical relations), or Moh/Lobh for that person, that's not a crush, that's just someone who looks good and you think about too much on your free time. 

All in all, what would I know, I'm just an imperfect human, but the answer from Bhai Gurdas Vaaran are even greater: https://www.searchgurbani.com/bhai-gurdas-vaaran/vaar/27/pauri/1 (The reason the whole page was cited was because it goes on even longer and would make this post too long).

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