Sanjog-status

[Guest kuwari]

Hi everyone,

 

I live in a Europe with a small punjabi community. My parents were finding a rishta for me but could not meet the requirements (no alcohol, meat, educated, no clubbing, and some requirements of family). Over the years i got introduced by my family to someone in America who does meet the basic requirements. At first it felt really nice and how it seemed meant to be (during my study times) but since I start working on my career I am doubting if I can make this overseas step. A few weeks back someone told my parents about a guy here, they did some background check and seems like a fine boy. However he eats meat but as he cooks on his own, he said I dont need to prepare for him. My moms like this is a small detail and he can give up eating it when he has sangat with me and the fam. So eventually there are two potenrial rishtas and the family is like choose one of them. As I was previously in touch with the american guy (then i said i leave the rest on my parents) im obviously biased..but I was always always stressed about immigration..

I tried to pick parchian and the vote was for America..but Its very hard..im still not content..i feel i have to start all over again, build a new social life and I really love the culture here. However if I view it in terms of Sikhi it seems maybe I should do it as his parents are also amritdhari..more sangat. Also my family is double minded..my mom really wants me closeby and my dad is saying that over there are better opportunities. My siblings are also telling me they support me in every decision but theyll miss me and they know it will be hard for me.. 

Baaki jithe Waheguru ji ne hukam likhea.. but it feels like in the end of the day it all comes on my plate. And i get really stressed about it..

[TaksalDaSingh9771]

Waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh 

i suggest that you take a hukamnama to see what maharaj thinks. Also, are you amritdhari?

[Guest kuwari]

wjkk wjkf, can I take this on my own via a website or should I go to the gurdwara? Im no amritdhari or sehajdhari..

[TaksalDaSingh9771]

Personally I would say that you should go to the local gurdwara but if there are none nearby then do an ardas and open maharaj (PDF or whatever your using) and take the first shabad that comes on the first line or select the shabad that continues on the next page

Bhul chuk maaf 

 

[Not2Cool2Argue]

8 hours ago, Guest kuwari said:

wjkk wjkf, can I take this on my own via a website or should I go to the gurdwara? Im no amritdhari or sehajdhari..

Also will you be able to say No to the American and wat explanation will you give? And will you be able to forget him completely,  if married to the other guy?

Also to make a hard choice, you should  write down the pros and cons of each choice . Then say if i remove all the cons of the Canadian guy, like if he took amrit, will that convince me? If not, then it means ur heart is already set on the other. Also if the american moved to canada, will that be enough to convince you he's the one without a doubt? If not, then maybe consider the other person 

 

[singhbj singh]

On 2017-6-25 at 1:52 AM, Guest kuwari said:

Hi everyone,

 

I live in a Europe with a small punjabi community. My parents were finding a rishta for me but could not meet the requirements (no alcohol, meat, educated, no clubbing, and some requirements of family). Over the years i got introduced by my family to someone in America who does meet the basic requirements. At first it felt really nice and how it seemed meant to be (during my study times) but since I start working on my career I am doubting if I can make this overseas step. A few weeks back someone told my parents about a guy here, they did some background check and seems like a fine boy. However he eats meat but as he cooks on his own, he said I dont need to prepare for him. My moms like this is a small detail and he can give up eating it when he has sangat with me and the fam. So eventually there are two potenrial rishtas and the family is like choose one of them. As I was previously in touch with the american guy (then i said i leave the rest on my parents) im obviously biased..but I was always always stressed about immigration..

I tried to pick parchian and the vote was for America..but Its very hard..im still not content..i feel i have to start all over again, build a new social life and I really love the culture here. However if I view it in terms of Sikhi it seems maybe I should do it as his parents are also amritdhari..more sangat. Also my family is double minded..my mom really wants me closeby and my dad is saying that over there are better opportunities. My siblings are also telling me they support me in every decision but theyll miss me and they know it will be hard for me.. 

Baaki jithe Waheguru ji ne hukam likhea.. but it feels like in the end of the day it all comes on my plate. And i get really stressed about it..

You should go with what your father n PARCHI says "America"

If you have a sister whose also eligible your mother can marry her to the other guy.

 

[Guest Canadian Sikh]

Sister, pulling a parchi makes no sense.

Taking hukamnama is a great suggestion but the hukamnama is not going to tell you which boy to take...Unfortunately there are no shabads that say America wala or England wala lol...

My suggestion is you go sit in the charna of Sri Guru Granth Sahib at your local gurdwara for an hour. Sit there and really focus on your issue. Maharaja will show you the direction.

 

[Guest Jasvir]

Huknama will not tell us Amreca or England but Huknama will tell us pure and right path ok mr.... Canadian sikh ji