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Guest Murakh

Jealousy

9 posts in this topic

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa. Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

Im really hating myself at this moment. Im doing allots of naam japp right now because i know this is not good but i cant handle myself. 

Its just someone has something which i dont have and thinking that i can do that too. My level of jealousy is on the peak right now that im doing naam japp so i can prevent my hyperventilation and get some strength. 

I am trying to not to think but because of my anxiety its going deeper. Thinking that i couldnt do or why i cant be on that level as someone else. 

I failed multiple times and still trying my best. I know this is challenge for me and i will stil do my best, thats the journey of life. But i want to get rid of my obstacle like jealous, hate, anxiety etc.  Does anyone know how to do that?? And my exams also starting Monday which I am scared of it. 

I hope my brothers and sisters can help this young murakh girl..

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh ji

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On 6/1/2017 at 6:20 PM, Guest Murakh said:

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa. Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

Im really hating myself at this moment. Im doing allots of naam japp right now because i know this is not good but i cant handle myself. 

Its just someone has something which i dont have and thinking that i can do that too. My level of jealousy is on the peak right now that im doing naam japp so i can prevent my hyperventilation and get some strength. 

I am trying to not to think but because of my anxiety its going deeper. Thinking that i couldnt do or why i cant be on that level as someone else. 

I failed multiple times and still trying my best. I know this is challenge for me and i will stil do my best, thats the journey of life. But i want to get rid of my obstacle like jealous, hate, anxiety etc.  Does anyone know how to do that?? And my exams also starting Monday which I am scared of it. 

I hope my brothers and sisters can help this young murakh girl..

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh ji

You have no need to be jeolous. One only needs to hunger for other peoples things if one is poor or wanting in life. But you are the daughter of the king of kings, the highest of the high. Instead of feeling weak or jeolous, reach out to the real giver. Tell him, you are the real giver, so you gave the other people the gifts, i want. Since you are the giver, you can give them to me too. Say, i domt mind if others have things, becauae u in ur infinite wisdom have given them thise things, but please be kind to me as well. Turn your jeolousy into an ardaas, an ardaas to thank the greatest  giver

 

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Vaheguru ji Ka Khalsa
Vaheguru ji Ki Fateh, ji

Ji, sikhaan ale bohat hai, par sikhi da ni. Basically you should not compare yourself to others.. That is the root of your suffering. Materialistic things don't really matter anyways, in fact you should be happy for the success of someone else since they too are from Sri Paramatman ji like you. If anyone thinks that they will do bad for someone, they are actually doing bad for themselves via karma. Then when the negative karma seed which they sowed is awarded in the future, they say 'why me?'. bhul chuk maaf kijye Vaheguru ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru ji Ki Fateh, ji

Edited by Preeet
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Waheguru ji ka khalsa 

Waheguru ji ki fateh

 

Aasaa:

 

To some, the Lord has given silks and satins, and to some, beds decorated with cotton ribbons.

 

Some do not even have a poor patched coat, and some live in thatched huts. ||1||

 

Do not indulge in envy and bickering, O my mind.

 

By continually doing good deeds, these are obtained, O my mind. ||1||Pause||

 

The potter works the same clay, and colors the pots in different ways.

 

Into some, he sets pearls, while to others, he attaches filth. ||2||

 

God gave wealth to the miser for him to preserve, but the fool calls it his own.

 

When the Messenger of Death strikes him with his club, in an instant, everything is settled. ||3||

 

The Lord's humble servant is called the most exalted Saint; he obeys the Command of the Lord's Order, and obtains peace.

 

Whatever is pleasing to the Lord, he accepts as True; he enshrines the Lord's Will within his mind. ||4||

 

Says Kabeer, listen, O Saints - it is false to call out, ""Mine, mine.""

 

Breaking the bird cage, death takes the bird away, and only the torn threads remain. ||5||3||16||

 

https://gurbaninow.com/shabad/1783/21579

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Dear  Guest Murakh,

below is some useful information I found on your topic of jealousy, which I am sharing here , hope it helps you to "see" things related to you from it,  and get the solutions also  by not getting traped by this bundle of  negative emotions.

With a clearer perspective, being jealous, is in a way, unconscioussly doubting Wahiguru.

Thanks to Guru Jee, we all know, nobody gets more,  nor less, than what is written in destiny for each one of us.

So, then why to be jealous?  Or, what for?  Life is quite fair, though we may not be aware of it., in its full measure.

 

Jealousy is described as the emotional attitude of wishing not to lose something that is important to the subject’s self-definition to someone else (Ben-Ze’ev, 1990, pg. 489).

 

An ancient and primitive emotion, jealously can lead to impulsive or reckless decisions, the creation of harm, the ruin of relationships, and an overall destructive state of mind.

 

As with most emotions, it manifests itself differently from individual to individual, but most would agree that when experienced, it can often be overwhelming.

 

Jealousy can also manifest itself in relationships between siblings, friends, supposed social rivals and many other affiliations.

The causes of jealousy vary from situation to situation, but are all associated with one feeling that something of value that they possess could be lost to another. 

 

The primary effects of jealousy are usually emotional and experienced by the individual alone. Secondary effects arise from how the subject reacts to that emotion.

 

In today’s society jealousy can be sparked by a potential threat to one’s mate, social standing, emotional and physical well-being or resources. Infidelity, or the threat of infidelity, can cause extreme jealousy in both males and females. If an individual is in a position of social power and feels that that standing is jeopardized by another, it often rears its ugly head. Sibling rivalry is often a result of jealousy, with siblings vying for parental attention or resources such as food. It also appears in friendships, when one feels that they are losing the attention of their friend to another.

 

Primary responses to jealousy are both emotional and physical. Sadness, anger, depression, hopelessness and feelings of unworthiness are just some of the emotions that result from it.

 

Crying, increased pulse rate, sweating and shaking are some of its physical symptoms . Feeling jealous is a natural reaction if one feels that their current state of well-being is threatened by another. What is perhaps more important is how one reacts to the negative emotions elicited by this emotional state. The primary effects of jealousy affect only the individual experiencing the emotion whereas the secondary effects (how that individual reacts) can influence the subject or subjects of jealousy.

 

There are myriad examples of jealousy being explored in literature throughout human history.  Cinderella is made to slave away for a jealous stepmother and step sisters in the famous fairy tale, and Shakespeare immortalized the destructive effects of the emotion in many of his plays, but perhaps the most poignant example was the cautionary account of Othello.

 

Protagonist Othello reacts to his jealousy with rage which results in the death of the woman he loves. He later finds that she was not unfaithful, as he had suspected.

 

Long before and long after the time of Shakespeare many individuals have reacted to jealousy in such a way.

 

In various studies, this strong emotion was found to have been one of the top three motives for non-accidental homicides where the motive is known (Harris, 2004, pg. 62).

 

Although an individual’s reaction to jealousy is not always to a murderous extreme, it serves as an example of how strong an emotion can be.

 

Other effects of jealousy include a decrease in one’s perceived self-worth, emotional instability, feelings of bitterness, the breaking of relationships, prolonged depression and extreme anxiety.

 

The history of jealousy may date back to the very beginnings of modern man. It is a primitive response to any potential threat to one’s overall emotional and physical well-being. Feelings of jealousy are unavoidable, but it is critical to examine one’s emotional response to any stimuli and react with a clear and conscious mind. Emotions are temporary, but actions are irrevocable.

 

 

Sat Sree Akal.

 

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Thank you very much for your beautiful my brothers & sisters for your replies. I read it with a smile that someone somewhere just care about me. 

Right now I am in my exam period and really scared because of my own behaviour. I dont want to give evil eyes to someone else. Whoeveer succeed in his/her life I am really happy but in my mind its the why question. "why i cannot be succesfull as others.." I know life is challenge and have to accept what Waheguru ji will give to me. I have already been trough from hell and thought positive. But at some point you give up and I am really scared about it. Because of my lack of strength, thinking negative and thinking that somebody would give me evil eyes I dont know what to do. My motivation for the exams is really low right now and really need that strength to have a better future for myself and people around my environment I really care.

Is there any Shabad or path I can do to control myself??

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8 hours ago, Guest Guest Murakh said:

 

Whoeveer succeed in his/her life I am really happy but in my mind its the why question. "why i cannot be succesfull as others.."

Guest Jee, being successful is also due to pat karam, noithing happens just like that.

I know life is challenge and have to accept what Waheguru ji will give to me.

Wahiguru gives only love, forgivness and blessings, let us not be unfair to Him, by making Him responsible for things which are own, like our each and own karam as said before. Why He would be unfair to anybody, or fvour anybody with partiality? He is not a manipulative Father, He is all loving, as seen by our Guru Sahiban.

I have already been trough from hell and thought positive.

But at some point you give up and I am really scared about it. Because of my lack of strength, thinking negative and thinking that somebody would give me evil eyes I dont know what to do.

Do not ever give up, giving up is like being as well as dead, try always your best, that much is only in your hands. Remember, before you were born, your destiny was already written according to your recorded karam.                 

It is like going to watch a movie, where no changes can be made on the spot, but just watch it with a detached and unaffected mind

My motivation for the exams is really low right now and really need that strength to have a better future for myself and people around my environment I really care.

Motivation for something like in your present condition is due to expectations. So, just simply do not expect anything, but face bravely any situation, like a sikh, with only hope and devotion in Wahiguru Akal Purukh.

If you have this attitude of sharda, slowly all negativity shall fade away

Is there any Shabad or path I can do to control myself??

Below, I am going to supply  2  lovely Shabads, which from my view, fit into the frame of your question, and your perception of uncertainity.

 

(382-8)
aasaa mehlaa 5.
Aasaa, Fifth Mehl:

jaa tooN saahib taa bha-o kayhaa ha-o tuDh bin kis saalaahee.
Since You are my Lord and Master, what is there for me to fear? Other than You, who else should I praise?


ayk tooNtaa sabh kichh hai mai tuDh bin doojaa naahee. ||1||
You are the One and only, and so do all things exist; without You, there is nothing at all for me. ||1||


baabaa bikh daykhi-aa sansaar.
O Father, I have seen that the world is poison.


rakhi-aa karahu gusaa-ee mayray mai naam tayraa aaDhaar. ||1|| rahaa-o.
Save me, O Lord of the Universe! Your Name is my only Support. ||1||Pause||


jaaneh birthaa sabhaa man kee hor kis peh aakh sunaa-ee-ai.
You know completely the condition of my mind; who else could I go to tell of it?


vin naavai sabh jag ba-uraa-i-aa naam milai sukh paa-ee-ai. ||2||
Without the Naam, the Name of the Lord, the whole world has gone crazy; obtaining the Naam, it finds peace. ||2||


ki-aa kahee-ai kis aakh sunaa-ee-ai je kahnaa so parabh jee paas.
What shall I say? Unto whom shall I speak? What I have to say, I say to God.


sabh kichh keetaa tayraa //tai sadaa sadaa tayree aas. ||3||
Everything which exists was created by You. You are my hope, forever and ever. ||3||


jay deh vadi-aa-ee taa tayree vadi-aa-ee it ut tujheh Dhi-aa-o.
If you bestow greatness, then it is Your greatness; here and hereafter, I meditate on You.


naanak kay parabh sadaa sukh-daatay mai taan tayraa ik naa-o. ||4||7||46||
The Lord God of Nanak is forever the Giver of peace; Your Name is my only strength

 

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(1096-15)
pa-orhee maaroo dakh-nay vaar mehlaa 5.
Pauree: Vaar Of Maaroo Dakhanay, Fifth Mehl

jaa too mayrai val hai taa ki-aa muhchhandaa.
When You are on my side, Lord, what do I need to worry about?


tuDh sabh kichh maino sa-upi-aa jaa tayraa bandaa.
You entrusted everything to me, when I became Your slave.


lakhmee tot na aavee khaa-ay kharach rahandaa.
My wealth is inexhaustible, no matter how much I spend and consume.


lakh cha-oraaseeh maydnee sabh sayv karandaa.
The 8.4 million species of beings all work to serve me.


ayh vairee mitar sabh keeti-aa nah mangeh mandaa.
All these enemies have become my friends, and no one wishes me ill.


laykhaa ko-ay na puchh-ee jaa har bhakhsandaa.
No one calls me to account, since God is my forgiver.


anand bha-i-aa sukh paa-i-aa mil gur govindaa.
I have become blissful, and I have found peace, meeting with the Guru, the Lord of the Universe.


sabhay kaaj savaari-ai jaa tuDh bhaavandaa. ||7||
All my affairs have been resolved, since You are pleased with me.

 

Guest Jee, best of luck for your exams and may His blessings be upon you always.

 

Sat Sree Akal.

 

 

 

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On 6/1/2017 at 6:20 PM, Guest Murakh said:

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa. Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

Im really hating myself at this moment. Im doing allots of naam japp right now because i know this is not good but i cant handle myself. 

Its just someone has something which i dont have and thinking that i can do that too. My level of jealousy is on the peak right now that im doing naam japp so i can prevent my hyperventilation and get some strength. 

I am trying to not to think but because of my anxiety its going deeper. Thinking that i couldnt do or why i cant be on that level as someone else. 

I failed multiple times and still trying my best. I know this is challenge for me and i will stil do my best, thats the journey of life. But i want to get rid of my obstacle like jealous, hate, anxiety etc.  Does anyone know how to do that?? And my exams also starting Monday which I am scared of it. 

I hope my brothers and sisters can help this young murakh girl..

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh ji

I know you got your answer, but why exactly are you jealous?

 

23 hours ago, Guest Guest Murakh said:

Is there any Shabad or path I can do to control myself??

Every shabad will do.

 

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On 6/8/2017 at 9:24 AM, Guest Guest Murakh said:

Thank you very much for your beautiful my brothers & sisters for your replies. I read it with a smile that someone somewhere just care about me. 

Right now I am in my exam period and really scared because of my own behaviour. I dont want to give evil eyes to someone else. Whoeveer succeed in his/her life I am really happy but in my mind its the why question. "why i cannot be succesfull as others.." I know life is challenge and have to accept what Waheguru ji will give to me. I have already been trough from hell and thought positive. But at some point you give up and I am really scared about it. Because of my lack of strength, thinking negative and thinking that somebody would give me evil eyes I dont know what to do. My motivation for the exams is really low right now and really need that strength to have a better future for myself and people around my environment I really care.

Is there any Shabad or path I can do to control myself??

Do sukhmani sahib da paath. I do it before every exam. Not to ask for good grades (tho i do ardaas for that as well ;)  but because it calms me down. My anxiety goes away and i can trust that all is in gods hand and he is the most kindest, so all will be well. That way you dont have to worry about giving evil eye since u wont be anxious. Try to do the paath with love and concentration.

Also it is said, that sukhmani sahib protects from buri nazar. 

And whenever your mind starts comparing you to others or thinking about how others did, tell ur mind to mind ur own business. Tell it to take care of itself, stop worrying abt wat others r doing

  

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