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Guest Kaur
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6 hours ago, Jacfsing2 said:

I read exactly what she said, and she said "now", she lives in Rehat and doesn't commit Bhujer

Hmm.

22 hours ago, Guest Kaur said:

I know I'm only to blame for this but why would Maharaj allow me to take Amrit if they knew I wasn't ready for it? Yes now I do live in rehat don't commit any bujjar kreths but I find it so hard. I did it because I thought I loved a boy and he pressured me into it being Amrit Dhari himself.

I read that as saying "I wasn't truly ready for Amrit. Why did Guru ji allow this? Now (meaning after taking Amrit), I live in rehat and don't commit bajjer kurehits, but it's still so hard. I did it (taking Amrit) because I loved a boy (mentally, not physically) and he pressured me into taking Amrit".

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Guest Jacfsing2
7 hours ago, Guest Kaur said:

Sorry I meant to say I haven't committed a bujjar Kreth since I took Amrit, if I wasn't ready why would Maharaj allow me to take it, knowing I used to cut my hair eat meat etc up to the day before I took Amrit? Honestly speaking I was so much happier before this even normal? This guy has mentally and physically tourmented me, I honestly thought my life would get better after taking it and now I'm just losing faith. 

Life probably was happier for you, but the problem is you are taking this guy as a result of Amrit, when they are both seperate things. Life is very precious, and if you were to end it, how would it affect your loved ones? Amrit is not a chance to free yourselves fron your problems what it is, is that Guru Sahib will hold your hand with your problems. Have you tried talking to a counselor or a close friend or family member to discuss your problems? 

I don't like the whole, "You only live once", but this is the only chance you have to have all your memories and everyone dear to you. Don't give-up life on something because one person did something.

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Guest Bhaenjee

Bhaenjee screw this guy. Speak to 

http://www.sikhhelpline.com

 

They have CONFIDENTIAL professionals that can help you. They will sort this stupid tosser who is giving you grief. He dont own you. You are your own person. Tell him to f*** off. This retard is nothing. You are a beautiful innocent sister who will one day graduate with great marks and eventually have a wicked family and kids to look after. You have a future. Go for a walk outside in the sun. Look at the beautiful nature around you. THERE IS MORE TO LIFE THAN THIS STUPID MAN. Ring your mum, dad and brothers and explaon to them that a guy is giving you grief. I gurantee your dad and brother will come and sort him out. This <banned word filter activated> dont deserve you. If you kill yourself you will never be able to experience the freedom and love you will have in the future away from this sociopath.

Well done for coming on this forum asking for help. You aint alone. We here for you.

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Guest AjeetSinghPunjabi

That guy's a blot on all amritdhari sikhs. But please do not kill yourself over this <banned word filter activated>.

And never should one take amrit for any reason except spiritual.  Can you confide about this situation with your family ? 

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Guest Bhaenjee

Also bhaenjee might I also add:

 

When you take Amrit this is JUST THE FIRST STEP INTO SIKHI. Your not suppose to feel or have some type of out of this world phenomenol experience straight away. Taking Amrit is just the initiacition. As you Japp Naam and keep Rehat and do Saad Sangat amd Seva you will progress ehvastaavaan (spiritual elevations) and more importantly your love for Vaheguru will emerge and blossom. You will no longer feel Sikhi/Amrit as a burden.. chill out and think about yourself. If you local and we can come down and sort this fella out.

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  • 6 months later...
Guest See a Counseller
On 28/04/2017 at 1:43 AM, Guest Kaur said:

I am a young girl who took Amrit recently, I feel like I was pressured and forced into it, I know I could've said no but it was more of a blackmail/love reason. I know I'm only to blame for this but why would Maharaj allow me to take Amrit if they knew I wasn't ready for it? Yes now I do live in rehat don't commit any bujjar kreths but I find it so hard. I did it because I thought I loved a boy and he pressured me into it being Amrit Dhari himself. The boy started hitting me and abusing me and speaking/ meeting several different girls, I couldn't do anything about it because I felt like I had changed for him and I felt like I was stuck with him I feel like I've been groomed in my own religion. Ive lost all my friends and hardly speak to any family (I study so I live out for university), because they know this person isn't good for me. I feel at such a low point in my life and I feel so alone, I thought taking Amrit was meant to uplift someone and make them happy. I'm at a stage in life where I don't even know if I believe in god and feel very suicidal. I just don't know what to do any more I have no one. 

You need to see a counseller urgently, especially if he hit you and you were having suicidal thoughts.

I got beaten up by a guy and contact the NHS IAPT service. They have them all over England so find your local one. But do it quickly before more damage is done to your emotional well-being. 

I was recently seeing a guy and when I told him I can't be with him, he blackmailed me, pretended to call the police on me(his friends were police officers who he said would ruin my life) and tried to force me to be with him. He was an actual psychopath and I knew if I saw him one more time he would likely hit me or worse, so I cut him out of my life, blocked him off everything and left him. I was alone, I don't talk to my family and was very depressed. But I still did it. Then I got back up again and continued with my life, because that's what strong women do. Look at Mai Bhago. She got beaten up and cut up with swords by a lot of men but she kept moving and living her life in chardi kala (Real happiness and peace).

The beauty about the western world is we have alot of choice. If you want to leave a guy you can, the only person who stops you is you. The only person who allows it to destroy them is you. You have options, you have counselling ready available to you when others in different countries don't have that luxury. 

Dont let the bas**rd win, get up, get be strong and go and seize and enjoy your life again. 

He won't lose any sleep over what he did to you, only you will. 

If youre not happy being amritshak and felt u were stronger before then don't do the external bit, go back to how you were. But remain a good soul. Don't go crazy and don't drink smoke etc. You can do internal rehat as other Bhagats, Kabir ji and Ravidas did without being externally amritshak. 

Taking amrit is symbolic externally of becoming internally pure. As long as you're internally pure, then the rest doesn't matter because internal purity is the Aim and end goal of taking amrit.

Get up, seize your life and be strong. Don't even let a man upset or destroy you. The Gurus didn't condone this and I'm sure they'd want you to get your <banned word filter activated> back up and seize this precious Janam too. 

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leave this person behind. Take a hukamnama at a local gurduwara as soon as possible (Guru Maharaj knows best).

When we take amrit we are dead to the world. Keep rehat. Get into contact with good sangat at local gurduwara. If he still bothers you or pphysically abuses then you need to learn how to stand for yourself. That is why it is so important to become shashterdhari or learn how to defend yourself, so you can stand for yourself and those who cannot stand for themselves. Doesn't this person have parents you can contact. If they were aware of what was happening, that might stop that trouble. 

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