Age Gap Marriage

[Big_Tera]

Advice needed asap. 

Does age gap in marriage cause a problem? I am talking like 12 years?

Ie marrying a girl from India in arranged marriage. Girl is 20 and male is 32. 

[Ranjeet01]

13 minutes ago, Big_Tera said:

Advice needed asap. 

Does age gap in marriage cause a problem? I am talking like 12 years?

Ie marrying a girl from India in arranged marriage. Girl is 20 and male is 32. 

Go for it Big Tera.

If you are settled down and established you will more attractive.

When you are 40, she'll only be 28.

[Big_Tera]

But I heard that the bigger the age difference the more chance of divorce. Also this is more then a decade and feels not right. Also maybe the girl wants a younger male. As its arranged she could be forced to marry as a way to get to the uk. I just feel guilty and uneasy about it. I would much prefer someone who was 25 + but cant find any girls that age. They all seem to be about 20.  I dont want her to resent me for my age. 

[Ranjeet01]

3 minutes ago, Big_Tera said:

But I heard that the bigger the age difference the more chance of divorce. Also this is more the a decade and feels not right. Also maybe the girl wants a younger male. As its arranged she could be forced to marry as a way to get to the uk. I just feel guilty. I would prefer someone who was 25 + but cant find any girls that age. They all seem to be about 20.  I dont want hwr to resent me for my age. plus would much like domone closer to my age. 

No girl from India going for a better life in the UK or any country in the west will consider it forced.

The only reason I can deduce that you cannot find a girl 25 and above is that they are perhaps educated and they are more picky and the 20 year old has probably done up to plus 2 and did not continue her education.

[Guest Jacfsing2]

If you feel guilty about it you could ask her how she feels about it. Marriages in modern day are just getting more and more where age matter less. If you are from the diaspora you might want to be careful if she's a green-card seeker especially when the girl is from India. That's the only thing to look out for.

[Big_Tera]

27 minutes ago, Jacfsing2 said:

If you feel guilty about it you could ask her how she feels about it. Marriages in modern day are just getting more and more where age matter less. If you are from the diaspora you might want to be careful if she's a green-card seeker especially when the girl is from India. That's the only thing to look out for.

That is the thing. She may or may not have issues with the age now. But her feelings could change down the line. I dont want to be responsible for ruining someones happiness in life. Alot of these women are unfortunatley not well off and have no choice but to marry abroad for a better life. Alot of the girls have no shortage of ristas from the uk. To be honest I am seriously thinking about not going ahead with any marriage proposal unless she is at least over 25. It just does not feel right at all. 

[Big_Tera]

34 minutes ago, Ranjeet01 said:

No girl from India going for a better life in the UK or any country in the west will consider it forced.

The only reason I can deduce that you cannot find a girl 25 and above is that they are perhaps educated and they are more picky and the 20 year old has probably done up to plus 2 and did not continue her education.

I will need to look longer I suppose untill I find someone of a similar age. Even if the girls parents want to go ahead with it. 12 is far to big a gap. I also dont think I will be compatibale with someone who will be less mature then me mentally. 

Not sure if anyone has experience if this ?

[Ranjeet01]

7 minutes ago, Big_Tera said:

I will need to look longer I suppose untill I find someone of a similar age. Even if the girls parents want to go ahead with it. 12 is far to big a gap. I also dont think I will be compatibale with someone who will be less mature then me mentally. 

Not sure if anyone has experience if this ?

If you feel that she is too young and need a girl who is closer to your age group, you have answered your own question.

[Big_Tera]

10 minutes ago, Ranjeet01 said:

If you feel that she is too young and need a girl who is closer to your age group, you have answered your own question.

I am speaking generaly as age is just a number. Thats the thing I am trying to work out what they are like as a person without much knowledge of them and without spending any time with them. Its just a gamble. 

[jkvlondon]

14 minutes ago, Big_Tera said:

I am speaking generaly as age is just a number. Thats the thing I am trying to work out what they are like as a person without much knowledge of them and without spending any time with them. Its just a gamble. 

you are talking the age difference larger than between my eldest and littlest , from observation there is no similarities in life experience barring parental input , all the common lore is not there unless He shows her and he  doesn't have interest or understanding of her viewpoint , so huge generational difference. then on top you have the differences of cultural experiences of growing up in different countries . I would imagine very risky gamble unless she is very traditional then you may be able to relate to her ...