Weddings: An expensive affair for guests

[jkvlondon]

Just now, MisterrSingh said:

They'd argue it's their money and nobodies business, but it's another one to add to the ever expanding list of problems that may seem superficial to some, but points towards a disturbing decay in our priorities, our ethics, and our attitudes, that can be found at the heart of our people.

but when they can't pay their plastic off I'm sure they'll go running to Daddy and Mummy and rip them off too ...seen it too many times . So infantile becoming a slave to the plastic just for a few hours worth of clotheswear. Somebody suggested hirewear ...these kind of sirrphiriya would turn up  their nose to it ... honestly they deserve all they get ...

[simran345]

6 minutes ago, jkvlondon said:

I spent 300 on my shoes and matching handbag for my wedding day and I thought that was extravagance . My whole suits collection for the new life were a grand total of 1 lakh rupees (14 suits all embroidered plus chunnian) which was less than the price of one of my Masi's chunnis for her wedding ...I think my Nana ji was impressed at my level headed- ness . I still have some of the chunnian (lost most of them in housefire) yep 26 years after the buying .... I just make new plain suits to go with them ... I do not agree with the whole ik din paalea dujha din sittleha, 

I don't need to get married again so I aint out to outshine the main players and youngsters, if it's something I like and have made well I wear it, else I'll just grab one of the old ones ... I don't care if it's been seen before , life's too short  and I'm just there to be part of the sangat.

 

Lol, I chose the cheapest lehnga in the store, although I wanted to wear a suit, but the nanke kept insisting on the lehnga and that they were paying for it. I wasn't happy about wearing it, I felt too ott. A suit I wanted, plain n simple, but instead a Xmas tree with a curtain wrapped around me, was what I became for the day, fancy dress or what ?. Never been worn again, now somewhere at my mother's house, under all the other suitcases, pile full of junk, which is getting smaller thankfully. 

My nanke said, you're the easiest girl out of the family to impress with outfits. I organised  most things diy myself, didn't see the point of going over the top. I even made the flowers myself. And now I'll not copy the other cousins, but wear what I'm comfortable in and that I can wear again to the Gurdwara. 

[jkvlondon]

6 minutes ago, simran345 said:

Lol, I chose the cheapest lehnga in the store, although I wanted to wear a suit, but the nanke kept insisting on the lehnga and that they were paying for it. I wasn't happy about wearing it, I felt too ott. A suit I wanted, plain n simple, but instead a Xmas tree with a curtain wrapped around me, was what I became for the day, fancy dress or what ?. Never been worn again, now somewhere at my mother's house, under all the other suitcases, pile full of junk, which is getting smaller thankfully. 

My nanke said, you're the easiest girl out of the family to impress with outfits. I organised  most things diy myself, didn't see the point of going over the top. I even made the flowers myself. And now I'll not copy the other cousins, but wear what I'm comfortable in and that I can wear again to the Gurdwara. 

my nana ji knew me well enough and despite not knowing even what colour he would select  it worked out plain light pink silk suit with pink on pink fine embroidery and fine gold bead on the edge of the chunni. 

Literally it was simple enough to wear to gurdwara any program . He knew I wasn't a showy person

[simran345]

45 minutes ago, MisterrSingh said:

Couple of young women in my neck of the woods spent no less than £2000 on a suit for a wedding that's never worn again. The wedding itself wasn't even in their family... 

They don't report the true price of what they're buying. £200-300 for a wedding suit is considered pauper-quality clothing. And these aren't wealthy people; they're just your average 9 to 5 women. And the husbands don't have a clue. 

That's the couture stuff, mehnga a. I think in London area, they spend more and it's more the higher end of designer clothes they go for. It's cheaper from India, but the only stuff I saw was over bright colours and all one type of design which are too colourful. I've noticed the women that recently come from India, they spend loads on their outfits, and like you said, their husbands probably don't know, but when they're paying for them they buy it them, which I've witnessed in stores. And there's me thinking "main sasta labdi a, and eh dhono couple mehngea nu pende" ??

[simran345]

56 minutes ago, singhbj singh said:

I totally agree with the author, "Wedding is an expensive affair for guests".

It's better to attend one or two events of the lot !

Rather than buying, one should consider renting a tux or lehenga.

That way you don't repeat an outfit plus can always keep up with trend.

 

That's a good idea, they do this in India. Thankfully we don't have many to attend, but those that do, must be hard for them, as people may get offended if they don't go. It's like a merry go round though isn't it. " Una ne sanu bulaya c viah te, hun sanu jana pena, ja na geye fer rusjana. Je geye, fer kise bolna nai, je asi bole, fer kena chaudar karde a."  This is what happens hana. 

 

[dallysingh101]

1 hour ago, MisterrSingh said:

Couple of young women in my neck of the woods spent no less than £2000 on a suit for a wedding that's never worn again. The wedding itself wasn't even in their family... 

They don't report the true price of what they're buying. £200-300 for a wedding suit is considered pauper-quality clothing. And these aren't wealthy people; they're just your average 9 to 5 women. And the husbands don't have a clue. 

I'm wondering. Is there an issue with women and consumerism, especially when it comes to make up and clothes? I guess we can also say that many blokes get stuck in this too, what with having to have the latest ride and stuff. 

[simran345]

24 minutes ago, jkvlondon said:

my nana ji knew me well enough and despite not knowing even what colour he would select  it worked out plain light pink silk suit with pink on pink fine embroidery and fine gold bead on the edge of the chunni. 

Literally it was simple enough to wear to gurdwara any program . He knew I wasn't a showy person

Wow this sounds nice and simple. You have the same taste as me penji. I've never seen anything like this in the stores nowadays, it's all too bright colours or heavily embroidered or big borders. 

Going back to the males, I have noticed the younger generation splash out a bit too, with their designer shirts and shoes, wonder if they are trying impress for future proposals or if it's just the trend now. 

[jkvlondon]

Just now, simran345 said:

Wow this sounds nice and simple. You have the same taste as me penji. I've never seen anything like this in the stores nowadays, it's all too bright colours or heavily embroidered or big borders. 

 

probably true I prefer classical reshmi embroidery like kashmiri shawls , phulkari embroidery, brocade designs like silk saris,  chikan or lucknow cotton suits are fave ... I will wear jewel colours but in plain material e.g. emerald, firozi , peacock blue , navy ... silver thread rather than gold . Point is I learnt from life that you make your own style from what looks good on you not what's on trend necessarily and it doesn't need to be expensive just well made . I've literally seen a cousin in simple colourful cotton suit look more glam than her sister decked in the bling OTT style suits . There is a point where Indians say to themselves one ring looks good so I should wear the full jewllery store then I'll look so cool ....pet peeve is a suit which has great material , good print but then been hot glued with pearl and gemstones all over , not even paying attention to whether it still looks good . 

[singhbj singh]

26 minutes ago, simran345 said:

That's a good idea, they do this in India. Thankfully we don't have many to attend, but those that do, must be hard for them, as people may get offended if they don't go. It's like a merry go round though isn't it. " Una ne sanu bulaya c viah te, hun sanu jana pena, ja na geye fer rusjana. Je geye, fer kise bolna nai, je asi bole, fer kena chaudar karde a."  This is what happens hana. 

 

It happens all over; India, America, UK

http://flyrobe.com/women/western?gclid=CLuu9tDLzNICFdKOaAod7CkPPA

https://tuxedo.menswearhouse.com

http://www.bollywoodborrowed.com

[simran345]

11 minutes ago, dallysingh101 said:

I'm wondering. Is there an issue with women and consumerism, especially when it comes to make up and clothes? I guess we can also say that many blokes get stuck in this too, what with having to have the latest ride and stuff. 

There are two reasons for this overspending, first being, the cousins or friends have the latest look, and they have to get a better outfit, which they think the more expensive one will be better. ?

The other reason is, the feel good factor. As women multi task a lot, and what with looking after kids, and in this country working too, they feel it's only right to treat themselves. But for some that goes beyond what they can afford. It's nice to have a treat, but personally I wouldn't be splashing out that much on something I'm not going to wear again. 

I hope when they're done with the outfits they don't throw them away. They can be given to charities for women in India who are unable to have things like that. 

I think men think more logically when it comes to weddings and parties, there's less competition and pressure. In India, you'll see the women with the latest fashion outfits and like here, but some men turn up wearing track suits or the winter jumpers, and jeans like normal clothes. So yes I see it as an issue, which needs educating on, here and India.