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13 hours ago, Guest singhperspective said:

I'm going to say something which you may not like bit I think it's important I put this out there for people to read.

I'm a 27 year old amritdhari singh (unmarried) from the uk. I'm quite "active" in religious circles and have many Singh friends similar to me aging from 20-30. We all feel the same way about most Singhnia we see in the UK. Primarily that they are very western in negative ways. Now we are western too and there is nothing wrong with taking the good bits of western culture, but we feel alot of kaurs these days take the wrong bits -mainly that they are not very family orientated and have a bit of an attitude. I'm really sorry if that offends but it is truly how ALOT of us feel.

Please don't confuse this with having a strong personality. We are all for strong, confident and independent singhnia, but at the end of the day we are looking for caring and warm qualities in a singhni as well. Alot of us singhs find uk singhnia to be quite cold and aloof and not very approachable. I think alot of uk girls have wrongly taken the concept of feminism and being equal to just being rude to singhs - i know some marriages that have broken over this stuff. Singhnis need to realise that it does not make them weak to take some care over their Singh and cook for them, look after the home etc. These are qualities which will be greatly appreciated but the Singh and in return the Singh will guve a great deal of love and support.

You are preaching to the wrong crowd.  No one can help these folks.  They will continue to aim the axe at their head repetitively.  It's like a drug, they know it is hurting them, but they continue to use because it's an addiction.   

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18 hours ago, Cloud said:

When your parents came to UK for 25+ years ago. Alot of things were different then in Punjab compared to their new country. 

Usually when any family moves to another country, one coping defense mechanism to deal with the situation is to hold on tradition and values. That is basically what your parents have done. This will affect your parents and your brothers judgement when selecting a partner for your brother. 

Mostly they think that if they can choose a country girl that does not have access to internet they can then "mold" that country girl to your brothers future with that girl. Unfortunetly that country girl after getting married to your brother then want to go to Paris fashion week 2018 and become a modern sikh woman.

This is a example what your parents see when they think of women in UK, US, CANADA etc.

https://www.youtube.com/v/LFebWgqUtRY?start=27&end=420

Watch this until 7:17. Safe for work.

That said I would just like to give you a word of advice.

Right now in India was not what is what 25+ years ago. What is going on is a "Woodstock sexual revolution" were young teenage girls have to choose between view of women in India which has been so distorted by the moghals for 800-1000 years which treat them like cattle or like a group of consumers in the modern consumer culture which is right now consuming the consciousness of mankind.

Most of them will choose the consumer ones of course. They will think this is 2017!

They do not know of the "bad" sides of consumer culture like Bibi Sat Kirin Kaur.

 

Good luck penji

VVJK VJKF

You keep putting up these 3HO peoples videos.  How are they in anyway noble.  They get unmarried people to perform tantric sex positions and play Vaheguru simran.  They perform worship of idols.  What can they teach others? 

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19 hours ago, Guest singhperspective said:

I'm going to say something which you may not like bit I think it's important I put this out there for people to read.

I'm a 27 year old amritdhari singh (unmarried) from the uk. I'm quite "active" in religious circles and have many Singh friends similar to me aging from 20-30. We all feel the same way about most Singhnia we see in the UK. Primarily that they are very western in negative ways. Now we are western too and there is nothing wrong with taking the good bits of western culture, but we feel alot of kaurs these days take the wrong bits -mainly that they are not very family orientated and have a bit of an attitude. I'm really sorry if that offends but it is truly how ALOT of us feel.

Please don't confuse this with having a strong personality. We are all for strong, confident and independent singhnia, but at the end of the day we are looking for caring and warm qualities in a singhni as well. Alot of us singhs find uk singhnia to be quite cold and aloof and not very approachable. I think alot of uk girls have wrongly taken the concept of feminism and being equal to just being rude to singhs - i know some marriages that have broken over this stuff. Singhnis need to realise that it does not make them weak to take some care over their Singh and cook for them, look after the home etc. These are qualities which will be greatly appreciated but the Singh and in return the Singh will guve a great deal of love and support.

I'd like to hear more. I've heard murmurings from young, decent Singhs about these issues, but for some reason they've been led to believe that articulating these concerns makes them anti-Guru mysoginists who want a wife that'll be chained up in the kitchen all day. It seems there's no middle ground. The question remains: how has third wave feminism - for that's essentially what we're seeing in action - managed to gradually mesh itself with orthodox, timeless Sikh ideals (in the truest sense of the phrase) in the West?

 

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@OP  i think the main reason ur parents want someone from india is that she will be more likely to live with an extended family. Most modern girls want their privacy, own place, and will see the in laws as interfering, criticizing burdens instead of as helpful, advice offering, sometimes annoying responsibility who r still family.

Secondly, they do want a wife that is dependent on the husband. That way she will be less likely to divorce over trivial things, and will be more likely to be a housewife and stay at home mom. Most modern uk women would not want to give up their careers to stay at home. And a stay at home mom is really important to raise kids in a traditional, healthy way.

Thirdly, i think there are very rare families who raised their daughters like ur parents did in the uk. Ur probably the only one in uk. In america there r some familiws that r as strict as urs complete with no internet n picking up kids from school. But still rare. Most tend to be strict taksali families, i think akj r more modern, more english speaking at home too. Maybe some very misogynist, traditional panjabi families r the same, but most panjabis that r not amritdhari r pretty lax.

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4 hours ago, Ranjeet01 said:

Girls from Punjab are no better or worse than UK girls.

The only difference is that UK girls are more open with their intentions whereas Punjab ones are more clandestine. 

Girls from Punjab are very much different than girls in the UK.  Girls in the UK hide a lot from their parents.  Changing at gas stations into promiscuous clothing, sometimes in the back of a cab, so they can go have a night out boozing, taking pills, and grind up on random guys.  Then comes the excuse.....mom im stay at my friends house.........which means, I met a guy and I am going to go sleep with him for the night.  Get up the next morning, change back into clothing their parents accept and back home to act like the best daughter any parents will have.  Parents know what goes on, but they rather not confront the demon in the room.  What's the excuse these girls use to hide their past from their husband...that's right....you are getting married to me and not my past.  And like a good puppy dog the western guy rolls over and takes it like a good boy.  This is the reality everywhere in the country.  There are a few good girls in the western world, but their demeanor is rude and stuck on extreme feminist ideology.  Who wants the Hulk as their partner. 

Girls in Punjab are not all the same.  The one`s who live in big cities are more likely to be stained with a similar brush as the UK girls.  Girls who leave for university outside of the family unit will be in a similar situation as the girls in a bigger city.  Unless she finds sangat in this manures field who does not also prescribe to the promiscuous lifestyle.   But girls in the pind that have their family and brothers and cousins to watch out for them have not indulged in this behaviour.  They had no chance and their moral compass does not allow them.  There sangat never existed of girls who were promiscuous and if, ever they befriend a girl who is.  The brother makes sure that friendship does not last more than 2 seconds. 

Can we say the same about western brothers or cousins, never!!!  Instead they party with their sister as their best friend feels her up as her boyfriend.  And the Punjabi girls who live in areas where there is less Punjabis.  They should be saved from this behaviour.  Nope not true at all.  Instead they date guys from other cultures and races.  These are the girls who will mostly like marry a person of a different race.  Parents in the western country have no control over their girls.  Some have been saved because they know better themselves.  Yet in Punjab, more girls are under the control of their parents and will not even attempt to go down the road of looking at a boy.  The consequences are too high.  If some backwards western minded person finds this as controlling.  Then tell me how much control your daughter has when she is drunk and on some sort of pill that was prepared by a crackhead.  I ask this question because this is the reality.  Unfortunately, police respond to a lot of cr*p they never want to see.

A girl from America who believes she is following Sikhi says she will not be ashamed to be naked in front of Vaheguru when discussing what is moral to wear for a girl in public.  She runs the blog Kaurlife.  Don`t believe me, go read this cr*p for yourself.  This is the crazy mind of a western Punjabi girl.     

There are 100 times better rishta in india than western countries. 

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7 minutes ago, Akalifauj said:

Girls from Punjab are very much different than girls in the UK.  Girls in the UK hide a lot from their parents.  Changing at gas stations into promiscuous clothing, sometimes in the back of a cab, so they can go have a night out boozing, taking pills, and grind up on random guys.  Then comes the excuse.....mom im stay at my friends house.........which means, I met a guy and I am going to go sleep with him for the night.  Get up the next morning, change back into clothing their parents accept and back home to act like the best daughter any parents will have.  Parents know what goes on, but they rather not confront the demon in the room.  What's the excuse these girls use to hide their past from their husband...that's right....you are getting married to me and not my past.  And like a good puppy dog the western guy rolls over and takes it like a good boy.  This is the reality everywhere in the country.  There are a few good girls in the western world, but their demeanor is rude and stuck on extreme feminist ideology.  Who wants the Hulk as their partner. 

Girls in Punjab are not all the same.  The one`s who live in big cities are more likely to be stained with a similar brush as the UK girls.  Girls who leave for university outside of the family unit will be in a similar situation as the girls in a bigger city.  Unless she finds sangat in this manures field who does not also prescribe to the promiscuous lifestyle.   But girls in the pind that have their family and brothers and cousins to watch out for them have not indulged in this behaviour.  They had no chance and their moral compass does not allow them.  There sangat never existed of girls who were promiscuous and if, ever they befriend a girl who is.  The brother makes sure that friendship does not last more than 2 seconds. 

Can we say the same about western brothers or cousins, never!!!  Instead they party with their sister as their best friend feels her up as her boyfriend.  And the Punjabi girls who live in areas where there is less Punjabis.  They should be saved from this behaviour.  Nope not true at all.  Instead they date guys from other cultures and races.  These are the girls who will mostly like marry a person of a different race.  Parents in the western country have no control over their girls.  Some have been saved because they know better themselves.  Yet in Punjab, more girls are under the control of their parents and will not even attempt to go down the road of looking at a boy.  The consequences are too high.  If some backwards western minded person finds this as controlling.  Then tell me how much control your daughter has when she is drunk and on some sort of pill that was prepared by a crackhead.  I ask this question because this is the reality.  Unfortunately, police respond to a lot of cr*p they never want to see.

A girl from America who believes she is following Sikhi says she will not be ashamed to be naked in front of Vaheguru when discussing what is moral to wear for a girl in public.  She runs the blog Kaurlife.  Don`t believe me, go read this cr*p for yourself.  This is the crazy mind of a western Punjabi girl.     

There are 100 times better rishta in india than western countries. 

Akalifauj

The scenario you are talking about UK girls is so 1980's. 

The girls of today are the daughters of those 1980 girls, it's a lot more out in the open.

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Just now, Ranjeet01 said:

Akalifauj

The scenario you are talking about UK girls is so 1980's. 

The girls of today are the daughters of those 1980 girls, it's a lot more out in the open.

Open for the girls who are born to these families, but not open for girls born in the family, who are first generation western born girls.  There parents barely can speak English and don`t know the culture around them.  They still hide what they do outside of the house.  Also I know of white families who don`t allow their daughters to date and go clubbing.  Yet their daughters hide what they do from the parents.  This has nothing to do with what their parents have done in the past.  It`s what the parents want now and what the western culture is telling their girls to do.  So they hide their behaviour.  Which girl goes home and tells their parents, she just got plastered and passed out at some random guys house.  Not even the most liberal girl in a white family will be shameful enough to tell her mother or father. 

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