I Married a saint or what?

[Guest Baljit kaur]

Thanks for the kind replies 

yes i used to work at timhortans supervisor but he never forced me to work,now he told me to rest at home. He never asked how much money and salary i got. Yes he taught me car and i can drive alone.

 

i am not complaining about him, there is no negative point in him but as a wife i want him to love me more than other people. I feel he loves everyone equally, no matter i am his wife or his mom or dad, even unlnown people are lovely to him i think. There is no extra attentions for me. I cant explain his behaviour exactly. He cares a lot. If i am sick and tell him,he cares full, ask me for meds on time, help me in cooking,kepp telling me to eat raw veggies but doing all this he is just kind of tension free, if i am well again he is not happy or i think even if i get more sick ,he will take more care but he willnot be sad i am sure.

 

Yes i keep asking many many questions about sikhi, he gave me answers no that kathawachaks tells. He said sant Rara Sahib Ishar singh was a true saint and I wanted to be with in their jatha. But I born about 10 yrs after sant ji. He listens to their deewans and bachans all the time.

[Akalifauj]

Why don't you join him? Do paath together.  Do seva together.  Discuss Shabad and maybe you will be able to understand and then experience what he is experiencing.

[Guest Reality check]

Consider yourself extremely lucky to be married to him.  I'll tell u what a "normal" married life is like.  Husband is busy chatting up girls on the net, doesn't tell u where he is, is busy with "friends", busy drinking, busy eating loads of steaks that stink up the whole house, busy complaining about you to his parents, extremely emotional, has anger management issues, spending time at the club, is a workaholic that has no time for you or kids, constantly complaining about money and I could go on and on.  You did something good in your past life to be married to a guy like him...just don't screw it up. 

[Guest Singh]

Vaheguru ji ka khalsa Vaheguru ji ki fateh. 

When or if you get to his stage everything changes. Nothing is equal to that anand. He has searched internally you are looking from the outside.

[Guest Jacfsing2]

8 hours ago, Guest Baljit kaur said:

Thanks for the kind replies 

yes i used to work at timhortans supervisor but he never forced me to work,now he told me to rest at home. He never asked how much money and salary i got. Yes he taught me car and i can drive alone.

 

i am not complaining about him, there is no negative point in him but as a wife i want him to love me more than other people. I feel he loves everyone equally, no matter i am his wife or his mom or dad, even unlnown people are lovely to him i think. There is no extra attentions for me. I cant explain his behaviour exactly. He cares a lot. If i am sick and tell him,he cares full, ask me for meds on time, help me in cooking,kepp telling me to eat raw veggies but doing all this he is just kind of tension free, if i am well again he is not happy or i think even if i get more sick ,he will take more care but he willnot be sad i am sure.

 

Yes i keep asking many many questions about sikhi, he gave me answers no that kathawachaks tells. He said sant Rara Sahib Ishar singh was a true saint and I wanted to be with in their jatha. But I born about 10 yrs after sant ji. He listens to their deewans and bachans all the time.

Sometimes we don't know what we want, which is why we are in deep confusion. Once in a while we get someone we NEED, and we wonder why we have it, your marriage to him has been Hukam from Vaheguru, Vaheguru felt it was order for both of you to get married so it happened. The question is what more do you want from someone? He doesn't judge you on how wealthy you are, he doesn't judge you whether you rest or work, he takes time out of his day to teach you driving, he loves you accordingly, (even without Moh), he takes care of you, he despite being tired makes food for you, and ultimately he cares about your spiritual growth. Your husband is the ideal, not some Hollywood/Bollywood nonsense, the ONLY one who could be better is the Vaheguru himself.

[Guest Jacfsing2]

15 hours ago, Guest Femaleboss said:

However,

Maybe you could introduce half an hour every day where he has to try to be like most of society, talk to you about the things you want to talk about, be engrossed in you. You will need him to be back down to earth when the baby arrives, you can't be the only one dealing with all the challenges, highs and lows parenting bring.

One of my uncles is like this and his kids resent him for it because he never pushed them at school or for careers, never took enough interest in developing them, only in sikhi.... Its a tough one, you need a balance when having a baby especially. You have to speak about it, have you spoken?

The price for attempting to change a Mahapurukh would be so high, it's not worth it. Exactly what is great about any society West or East, that would surpass Gurmat? When one parent is obsessed with their significant other, it just takes time away from everyone, he might probably be a legendary parent for his kids because he doesn't spoil people or put them on special pedestals. Daas's grandfather was somewhat like O.P.'s husband, (engrossed in doing Gurbani, and Naam), and nobody seemed to be making complaints about him, other than he doesn't talk much.

[jkvlondon]

10 minutes ago, Jacfsing2 said:

The price for attempting to change a Mahapurukh would be so high, it's not worth it. Exactly what is great about any society West or East, that would surpass Gurmat? When one parent is obsessed with their significant other, it just takes time away from everyone, he might probably be a legendary parent for his kids because he doesn't spoil people or put them on special pedestals. Daas's grandfather was somewhat like O.P.'s husband, (engrossed in doing Gurbani, and Naam), and nobody seemed to be making complaints about him, other than he doesn't talk much.

difference was I guess he wasn't being compared to some worldly ideal ...love's other name is acceptance , maybe bhainji needs to love him in gurmukh sense too

[Guest _ssinghuk_]

Amazing, if I saw your husband bhenjee, I'd touch his feet!!! Dhan GurSikh! You are so lucky to have sangat of such a person.

[singhbj singh]

Bheinji normally Bibi's are busy chatting with their sisters, mom, cousins, aunts, friends, neighbors etc

They don't have time to think about this sort of stuff.

Problem in marrying abroad is you don't get this support group which is available at home.

Don't know how things work in your community but most Bibi's call their parents so that they can help during pregnancy & delivery.

In older times Bibi's were send to PEKE so that they are comfortable and taken care of at the time of delivery.

This might give you and your husband a Break !

 

[Guest Jacfsing2]

31 minutes ago, singhbj singh said:

PEKE 

What's Peke?