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SURVEY: 90% DIVORCED WOMEN PREFER GURSIKH,15% UNMARRIED PREFER GURSIKH


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25 minutes ago, Jacfsing2 said:

Doesn't our community have lots of doctors and lawyers though? Maybe it's subcontinent mentality of something. Also most of the Jatt diaspora aren't farmers, so they could've easily gotten someone to marry of the same standards. 

Dependent on where they were looking and the relevant age they required for the girl, they'd already been snapped up I suppose. The crux of the issue I was trying to highlight was that the apparently concrete criteria the potential boy had to meet that the mother was specifying (a white-collar professional in a prestigious industry) was thrown out of the window when they received a rishta whereby the guy was, to all intents and purposes, a millionaire, or at least set to inherit his father's considerable assets. His lack of education and qualifications, or his coarse, unrefined personality wasn't considered to be an issue, due to him having an abundance of income at his disposal. So, therefore, the true requirement / condition for a potential match the mother was stating was proven to be a lie. What she should've said was, "I want someone who is filthy rich." The "highly educated / white-collar professional in an elite industry" criteria was proven to be a smokescreen.

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56 minutes ago, MisterrSingh said:

Dependent on where they were looking and the relevant age they required for the girl, they'd already been snapped up I suppose. The crux of the issue I was trying to highlight was that the apparently concrete criteria the potential boy had to meet that the mother was specifying (a white-collar professional in a prestigious industry) was thrown out of the window when they received a rishta whereby the guy was, to all intents and purposes, a millionaire, or at least set to inherit his father's considerable assets. His lack of education and qualifications, or his coarse, unrefined personality wasn't considered to be an issue, due to him having an abundance of income at his disposal. So, therefore, the true requirement / condition for a potential match the mother was stating was proven to be a lie. What she should've said was, "I want someone who is filthy rich." The "highly educated / white-collar professional in an elite industry" criteria was proven to be a smokescreen.

1 hour ago, Ranjeet01 said:

For diaspora Sikhs, there is less stigma marrying out of traditional caste, there is a new caste system taking place based on profession and income.

Women always marry up. A girl working in a supermarket earning 15k a year can marry a boy who works as a lawyer earning 80k a year. 

A girl who works as a lawyer earning 80k a year cannot marry a boy working in a supermarket earning 15k a year.

She will want some earning more than her.

One final question for both these answers, (both are very good), why don't casteist Jatts marry Brahmins and Khatris if their goal is marrying up? Jatts considered much lower than Brahmins according to the Hindu Caste system, (this always surprised Daas, because of everyone wanted to marry higher than the caste believers would want to marry higher as well?) But most matrimonial people say they want to marry a Jatt boy, (to those Jatts who believe in caste), but never saying Brahmins and Khatris, (both of whom are higher ranked?)

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26 minutes ago, Jacfsing2 said:

One final question for both these answers, (both are very good), why don't casteist Jatts marry Brahmins and Khatris if their goal is marrying up? Jatts considered much lower than Brahmins according to the Hindu Caste system, (this always surprised Daas, because of everyone wanted to marry higher than the caste believers would want to marry higher as well?) But most matrimonial people say they want to marry a Jatt boy, (to those Jatts who believe in caste), but never saying Brahmins and Khatris, (both of whom are higher ranked?)

The sense of "shame" of marrying out of the Sikh religion (for some people who consider such things as relevant) is an insurmountable barrier. I guarantee you, particularly in the diaspora, if Sikhs openly and readily marrying Hindus was a cultural norm, the scenario you posited in bold above would be incredibly common. Some of our lot would rather their offspring marry out of the faith to someone comparatively higher-up on the social ladder, than marry anyone of perceived lower status in the same religion. Why do you suppose our lot beam with joy when their son brings home a white girl? It's a sign of upwards mobility. We are truly a befuddled people, lol, and things are set to get much, much worse as time goes by.

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2 hours ago, Jacfsing2 said:

One final question for both these answers, (both are very good), why don't casteist Jatts marry Brahmins and Khatris if their goal is marrying up? Jatts considered much lower than Brahmins according to the Hindu Caste system, (this always surprised Daas, because of everyone wanted to marry higher than the caste believers would want to marry higher as well?) But most matrimonial people say they want to marry a Jatt boy, (to those Jatts who believe in caste), but never saying Brahmins and Khatris, (both of whom are higher ranked?)

There is a peculiarity amongst Jatts. Even though they are lower on the ladder in the caste hierarchy, Jatts do not feel inferior to Brahmin and Khatris.

Jatts, even Hindu Jatts do not follow Brahmin authority.

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1 minute ago, Ranjeet01 said:

There is a peculiarity amongst Jatts. Even though they are lower on the ladder in the caste hierarchy, Jatts do not feel inferior to Brahmin and Khatris.

Jatts, even Hindu Jatts do not follow Brahmin authority.

And that, I believe, is due to the confidence and teachings imparted to us by our Gurus. Of course, there's social and cultural issues that come into play as well, but it's a brilliant observation that holds water.

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9 hours ago, Ranjeet01 said:

For diaspora Sikhs, there is less stigma marrying out of traditional caste, there is a new caste system taking place based on profession and income.

Women always marry up. A girl working in a supermarket earning 15k a year can marry a boy who works as a lawyer earning 80k a year. 

A girl who works as a lawyer earning 80k a year cannot marry a boy working in a supermarket earning 15k a year.

She will want some earning more than her.

nah you got it wrong the male lawyer marries his choice of young eager brides to be who more than likely don't have equal level of education but are younger (something's got to give). So the time the female qualifies by passing the bar there is a dearth of same age/level guys to marry so then she hangs around looking but keeps getting rebuffed for her age then she has to settle for less educated guys whose lifeview is different than hers and she will get grief for her educated ways by her MIL.

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On 10/09/2016 at 7:13 PM, Jacfsing2 said:

How is slavery funny? This isn't just you marrying someone from a different culture, religion, nation, and whatever, but rather it's a system of paying money to buy someone who has other problems. (They even list an exact price, how awful can it get?) 

So you are forbidding me to laugh at something wrong? Slavery existed from the time of The Roman empire. And guess what? Slavery & other bad things that happen to people, it is a product of their karm, basically they deserved it.

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1 hour ago, CEO said:

So you are forbidding me to laugh at something wrong? Slavery existed from the time of The Roman empire. And guess what? Slavery & other bad things that happen to people, it is a product of their karm, basically they deserved it.

If your bringing Karams into it, we'd all be in constant punishment. Only the Satguru was ever without Karma. Daas knows that none of us are completely pure without Guru Sahib. Don't mix Hindu Karam ideology with the idea of Sikh Karam, the 2 are very different. Also there seems to be confusion between Hukam and Karams. When Gurbani says,and "manas ki jat sabhe eke paihcanbo", and then we have some people believing in slavery, we got a problem. (Also what makes your Karams so great, since you want to bring that into it, if we were judged on Karams 100% of us would be permanent in reincarnation, like Hindus believe?)

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8 hours ago, jkvlondon said:

nah you got it wrong the male lawyer marries his choice of young eager brides to be who more than likely don't have equal level of education but are younger (something's got to give). So the time the female qualifies by passing the bar there is a dearth of same age/level guys to marry so then she hangs around looking but keeps getting rebuffed for her age then she has to settle for less educated guys whose lifeview is different than hers and she will get grief for her educated ways by her MIL.

Interesting you use the word "settle" and you prove my point exactly. 

For most men, they do not really care whether their potential spouse is a lawyer or works in a supermarket. The biggest factor is that they are young and pretty.

Education for women is status related. Women always want to raise their level.

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