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Help regarding Parents and Ritualism


Thanatos
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Congrats Mr Doaba Jee,

according to your beautful post above, with which I agree 100%, plus I could say, that at last, there is someone with common sense and truthful to Gurmat.

Once again, hats off Brother!!!

What I have seen here is, times are changing, so is the mentality of the newer generations, though more or less they are on Gurmat, but are somehow rebels, stubborn...

I really can not understand, how most of us come daily and spend sometime here apparently amicably, and still, at the least chance we spit fire, without giving a second chance, that their words, may hurt or be painful to others ....

I can not understand, how can people change their behaviour just like that ....from east to west, really disturbing and not understandable.

Referring to Brother Singhbj Singh, from his posts since he is member here, I can say he is a coolest and most peaceful person which can be found here...

I really feel sorry for him, being abused so mercilessly .... Let us ask ourselves, has he sudeenly forgotten all his manners or virtues displyed in his posts till now?

After all what was his crime, if any? 

I only saw goodness, and he has been offended for it.

Shame on all of them.

Sometimes this place is worse than a mad house. All attacking at a time to someone or the other.  That too, what for?

It is very unpleasant to see, how some can change their behaviour to the extremes, almost as fanatics... getting trapped in krodh, and spreading uneasiness/ashanti.

Let us widen the horizons of our minds, and stop blaming and accusing others for our own pettiness

Why can not we intercat with each other with respect and decency without loosing our mental balance? 

It is like a castle of cards, one card looses its balance, all others follow blindly and fall on the ground....

Remember, no matter how much we may say, we are sikhs, we are this or that, if we have no mercy or kindness in  our hearts towards others, we shall never be able to walk on the beautiful and unique path of Sikee.

God is love, and unless we learn to love and plant the virtues of mercy, of forgiveness and tolerance, we can never be able do His chintan/His Dhyan.

Only those pure of hearts and minds, (it is a state of avastha of purity, of goodness), can tread the path of Gurmat.

Jin prem kiyo, tinhee Prabh paayo.

Sat Sree Akal.

 

 

 

 

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5 hours ago, singhbj singh said:

If my parents ordered me to cut my Kesh, I won't !

Now let me ask a question,

Who deserves to stay in family home one whose obedient or who disobey's ?

 

What sort of parent would throw their child out, if you lived with your parents and refused to cut your hair you're dishonouring them and causing strife. Please don't backtrack your own words, those are your words mate. If you lived with your parents and they orders you to cut your kesh by your logic you would do it.

31 minutes ago, MrDoaba said:

Next year the thread title will be “Does wearing a rakhri mean I support RSS?”

A lot of apne need to take a few Benadryls because they’ve got a serious Hindu allergy.

Rakhri is NOT a religious ceremony anyway.

Why people can’t understand that symbolic practises are not anti-Gurmat is beyond me.

One must understand that symbolic practises and rituals are criticized in Gurbani as people had started to believe that the rituals alone had spiritual benefit. If we follow Gurbani then we wil not fall into this trap.

But by using the logic that xyz is anti-Gurmat and an empty ritual then many things in Sikhi would need a serious overhaul. Other aspects of our lives would also need rethinking.

When we get into this frame of mind you can ask whole load of ridiculous questions. You can see how quickly it becomes pagal puna to ask such bakwaas:

Many people wear a thin Kara so the Kara has become symbolic. Should we stop wearing them?

Why matha tek? It’s only symbolic.

Why do palle da rassam before Anand Karaj? It’s only symbolic. Hell why even do phere around Mahraaj during Anand Kaaraj.

Why do we have white chadaraan at the Gurdwara? It’s just a symbolic way of Mahraaj calling us the Sadh Sangat so we don't really need them.

Why have jyot at the Gurdwara? And you can’t say because ghyio purifies the air because jyot these days is always in a small cabinet tucked away in a little corner. It’s just symbolic.

Tbh why do we even have Akhand Path maryada? Much of it is symbolic.

What’s the point of the Khanda? It’s just a symbol isn’t it? Similarly why does Nihang Fauj wear Aad Chand? Just another symbol isn’t it?

Why have Amrit Sanchar? It’s just symbolic.

Why did Guru Sahiban do the rituals and symbolic practises when passing on the Gurgaddi? It was just an empty ritual and symbolic!! Will people now go and question Mahraaj?!

Why did Dhan Dhan Satguru Sri Guru Gobind Singh Ji Mahraaj wear a Kalgi? It’s only symbolic of being a King. Will we now question Mahraaj?!

The above are just a few obvious questions that can be asked but if we keep going, as I once read, we will firmly end up in Kala Afghanas camp. The missionaries are attacking Sikh left, right and centre by posing similar questions but about the fundamental concepts of Sikhi.

Please stop this Talibanisation of Sikhi Sangat Ji.

Rakhi is a religious holiday, just look it up. The whole concept comes from canonical Hinduism. Even the secular approach to it is extremely pointless. 

On phone right now so I can't really go into WHY it is pointless. However I will ask you is there's a difference between symbolism and empty ritual. I wouldn't call Amrit "symbolic" as well, that's a direct jnsult to Guru Gobind Singh Ji. 

There no talibanasation Guru Sahib never took part in it so why are you so hell bent on defending it?

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Sant Ji mentions it and how we as Sikhs have our own Rakhi (the the form of Gurbani). That is what we should follow, none other.

 

Guru Sahib also wisely states.

 

 
 
लख चोरीआ लख जारीआ लख कूड़ीआ लख गालि ॥
 
Lakẖ cẖorī▫ā lakẖ jārī▫ā lakẖ kūṛī▫ā lakẖ gāl.
 
He commits thousands of robberies, thousands of acts of adultery, thousands of falsehoods and thousands of abuses.
 
 
 
लख ठगीआ पहिनामीआ राति दिनसु जीअ नालि ॥
 
Lakẖ ṯẖagī▫ā pahināmī▫ā rāṯ ḏinas jī▫a nāl.
 
He practices thousands of deceptions and secret deeds, night and day, against his fellow beings.
 
 
 
तगु कपाहहु कतीऐ बाम्हणु वटे आइ ॥
 
Ŧag kapāhahu kaṯī▫ai bāmĥaṇ vate ā▫e.
 
The thread is spun from cotton, and the Brahmin comes and twists it.
 
 
 
कुहि बकरा रिंन्हि खाइआ सभु को आखै पाइ ॥
 
Kuhi bakrā rinniĥ kẖā▫i▫ā sabẖ ko ākẖai pā▫e.
 
The goat is killed, cooked and eaten, and everyone then says, "Put on the sacred thread".
 
 
 
होइ पुराणा सुटीऐ भी फिरि पाईऐ होरु ॥
 
Ho▫e purāṇā sutī▫ai bẖī fir pā▫ī▫ai hor.
 
When it wears out, it is thrown away, and another one is put on.
 
 
 
नानक तगु न तुटई जे तगि होवै जोरु ॥२॥
 
Nānak ṯag na ṯut▫ī je ṯag hovai jor. ||2||
 
O Nanak, the thread would not break, if it had any real strength. ||2|

 

25 minutes ago, harsharan000 said:

Congrats Mr Doaba Jee,

according to your beautful post above, with which I agree 100%, plus I could say, that at last, there is someone with common sense and truthful to Gurmat.

Once again, hats off Brother!!!

What I have seen here is, times are changing, so is the mentality of the newer generations, though more or less they are on Gurmat, but are somehow rebels, stubborn...

I really can not understand, how most of us come daily and spend sometime here apparently amicably, and still, at the least chance we spit fire, without giving a second chance, that their words, may hurt or be painful to others ....

I can not understand, how can people change their behaviour just like that ....from east to west, really disturbing and not understandable.

Referring to Brother Singhbj Singh, from his posts since he is member here, I can say he is a coolest and most peaceful person which can be found here...

I really feel sorry for him, being abused so mercilessly .... Let us ask ourselves, has he sudeenly forgotten all his manners or virtues displyed in his posts till now?

After all what was his crime, if any? 

I only saw goodness, and he has been offended for it.

Shame on all of them.

Sometimes this place is worse than a mad house. All attacking at a time to someone or the other.  That too, what for?

It is very unpleasant to see, how some can change their behaviour to the extremes, almost as fanatics... getting trapped in krodh, and spreading uneasiness/ashanti.

Let us widen the horizons of our minds, and stop blaming and accusing others for our own pettiness

Why can not we intercat with each other with respect and decency without loosing our mental balance? 

It is like a castle of cards, one card looses its balance, all others follow blindly and fall on the ground....

Remember, no matter how much we may say, we are sikhs, we are this or that, if we have no mercy or kindness in  our hearts towards others, we shall never be able to walk on the beautiful and unique path of Sikee.

God is love, and unless we learn to love and plant the virtues of mercy, of forgiveness and tolerance, we can never be able do His chintan/His Dhyan.

Only those pure of hearts and minds, (it is a state of avastha of purity, of goodness), can tread the path of Gurmat.

Jin prem kiyo, tinhee Prabh paayo.

Sat Sree Akal.

 

 

 

 

Bro things can get heated here but Singhbj is being a hypocrite in this situation. If sour words were said I apologise on my behalf.

 

In Sukhmani Sahib Guru Arjun Dev Ji writes 

 

 
मिथिआ तनु धनु कुट्मबु सबाइआ ॥
 
Mithi▫ā ṯan ḏẖan kutamb sabā▫i▫ā.
 
False are body, wealth, and all relations

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Guru Arjun Dev Ji writes 

 

 
मिथिआ तनु धनु कुट्मबु सबाइआ ॥
 
Mithi▫ā ṯan ḏẖan kutamb sabā▫i▫ā.
 
False are body, wealth, and all relations

 

 

 

 

 

He also states 

 

 
जब लगु जानै मुझ ते कछु होइ ॥
 
Jab lag jānai mujẖ ṯe kacẖẖ ho▫e.
 
As long as someone thinks that he is the one who acts,
 
 
 
तब इस कउ सुखु नाही कोइ ॥
 
Ŧab is ka▫o sukẖ nāhī ko▫e.
 
he shall have no peace.
 
 
 
जब इह जानै मै किछु करता ॥
 
Jab ih jānai mai kicẖẖ karṯā.
 
As long as this mortal thinks that he is the one who does things,
 
 
 
तब लगु गरभ जोनि महि फिरता ॥
 
Ŧab lag garabẖ jon mėh firṯā.
 
he shall wander in reincarnation through the womb.

A brother can't make a pledge to protect his sister, he's not the one with actual power to do such a thing is he now?

 

 

@harsharan000 Singhbj JI is being a hypocrite right now, that's way many of the Sangat are frustrated. Guru Sahib even stated that Rehit is equally important in a proper GurSikh life, Guru Sahib was very clear in his Jeevan life and his Gurbani that tying any thread is an empty ritual. The concept of Rakhsa Bandan came from a purana (iirc) and Guru Gobind Singh Ji told us to reject them and follow only Gurbani.

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1 hour ago, Thanatos said:

Rakhi is a religious holiday, just look it up. The whole concept comes from canonical Hinduism. Even the secular approach to it is extremely pointless. 

On phone right now so I can't really go into WHY it is pointless. However I will ask you is there's a difference between symbolism and empty ritual. I wouldn't call Amrit "symbolic" as well, that's a direct jnsult to Guru Gobind Singh Ji. 

There no talibanasation Guru Sahib never took part in it so why are you so hell bent on defending it?

Thantos Veera if you do not wish to wear a rakhri then refrain from doing so. My post in no way meant to state that it is fundamental to celebrate it. Rakhri is a two way street if both parties are not sincere in their heart then celebrating Rakhri is indeed pointless. If the celebration of Rakhri brings no benefit to an individual then it is also pointless. In your case it probably is.

I’m not forcing Rakhri on anyone as I do not indulge in Talibanisation.

I have one rakhri tied on my wrist which has been sent to me by a cousin sister from India. She has sent one every year since I was little. We rarely see each other. Someone has made an effort to make a point that their relationship with me is important so I simply wish to honour this. When I receive that rakhri in the post and then have it tied I feel humbled that I am lucky enough to have a strong family bond and it invokes strong feelings of pyaar. Having said that one can say this is promoting Moh to which I will reply I am not Bramhgyani and currently these feelings are somewhat important to a moorakh like me. Maybe this will change in time but I can say for now Rakhri has definitely benefited me.

I should add my own sisters do not celebrate Rakhri and that is their choice. I have no problem with this.

There are many things Mahraaj didn’t take part in that we do today. This is an illogical argument. I believe there isn’t any reference to Rakhri in any Puratan Granths.

You should also remember we all see the world in a different light and all our brains work differently. Two people may interpret a Shabad differently etc. Forcing one to believe what you deem correct is Talibanisation. If we approach everything with strict interpretations then how would anyone learn? Contemplation would go out the window and the essence of Veechar would be lost. Like Harsharan Veera said above, let us widen the horizons of our minds.

And Veera read my post carefully; I did not say that Amrit itself was symbolic but merely the idea of Pahul. It’s a symbolic initiation of the Sikh to his Guru.

If there are any references to sacred or religious threads in Gurbani then one should first go and find out the purpose and meaning of those threads in the Mat they're used in. There are many types sacred and religious threads and all hold different meaning so please remember this when quoting Gurbani and also remember the context of the Shabad.

On a lighter note, I once learned something valuable from the wrapper of some supposedly sacred thread. There was a quote on the wrapper which was as follows:

“Jahan Puja Dharam...Vahan Saraswati Param.”

 

This loosely translates to “Where there is worship and Dharam...At that place knowledge is supreme”.

 

Bhul Chuk Maaf

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8 hours ago, singhbj singh said:

If my parents ordered me to cut my Kesh, I won't !

Now let me ask a question,

Who deserves to stay in family home one whose obedient or who disobey's ?

 

bro answer me this ...Did ANY of the Guru Sahiban disown their children (apart from that son that altered gurbani to impress the mughal Emperor) did Guru Nanak Dev ji disown Sri Chand when he gave jawaab for any of the tasks set to test him or even when he rejected sikhi to become an udaasi? or even Pritvi Chand by Guru Ram Das ? 

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2 hours ago, MrDoaba said:

Thantos Veera if you do not wish to wear a rakhri then refrain from doing so. My post in no way meant to state that it is fundamental to celebrate it. Rakhri is a two way street if both parties are not sincere in their heart then celebrating Rakhri is indeed pointless. If the celebration of Rakhri brings no benefit to an individual then it is also pointless. In your case it probably is.

I’m not forcing Rakhri on anyone as I do not indulge in Talibanisation.

I have one rakhri tied on my wrist which has been sent to me by a cousin sister from India. She has sent one every year since I was little. We rarely see each other. Someone has made an effort to make a point that their relationship with me is important so I simply wish to honour this. When I receive that rakhri in the post and then have it tied I feel humbled that I am lucky enough to have a strong family bond and it invokes strong feelings of pyaar. Having said that one can say this is promoting Moh to which I will reply I am not Bramhgyani and currently these feelings are somewhat important to a moorakh like me. Maybe this will change in time but I can say for now Rakhri has definitely benefited me.

I should add my own sisters do not celebrate Rakhri and that is their choice. I have no problem with this.

There are many things Mahraaj didn’t take part in that we do today. This is an illogical argument. I believe there isn’t any reference to Rakhri in any Puratan Granths.

You should also remember we all see the world in a different light and all our brains work differently. Two people may interpret a Shabad differently etc. Forcing one to believe what you deem correct is Talibanisation. If we approach everything with strict interpretations then how would anyone learn? Contemplation would go out the window and the essence of Veechar would be lost. Like Harsharan Veera said above, let us widen the horizons of our minds.

And Veera read my post carefully; I did not say that Amrit itself was symbolic but merely the idea of Pahul. It’s a symbolic initiation of the Sikh to his Guru.

If there are any references to sacred or religious threads in Gurbani then one should first go and find out the purpose and meaning of those threads in the Mat they're used in. There are many types sacred and religious threads and all hold different meaning so please remember this when quoting Gurbani and also remember the context of the Shabad.

On a lighter note, I once learned something valuable from the wrapper of some supposedly sacred thread. There was a quote on the wrapper which was as follows:

“Jahan Puja Dharam...Vahan Saraswati Param.”

 

This loosely translates to “Where there is worship and Dharam...At that place knowledge is supreme”.

 

Bhul Chuk Maaf

 

Bro I've posted a link from a Mahapurkh telling us what true Rakhi is and where it comes from for Sikhs, he told us what WE SHOULD BE FOLLOWING. To back my point up I even posted audio proof from a Mahapurkh who's Avasta is far above yours or mine, 

 

You are right 2 methods may result in 2 variations, however one of those variations can easily be wrong. There's a shabad in Gurbani where Bhagat Kabir Ji spoke against keep kesh supposedly, however the actual arth is talking against hypocrisy. interpretations come from gyan and avasta along side actual coherent knowledge of Sikhism. You've not presented a single line from any Gurbani where these things are considered fine. By your use of logic some Muslims/Hindus/confused sikhs who insist  Dasam Pita's bani are asking us to worship Devi Devta is considered just as right as those who consider the bani to be speaking the exact opposite. Or how about those Hindus who insist that Gurbani is praising Vishnu rather the the primordial lord. Are they just as right as us? Guru Gobind Singh Ji did Santhiya of Gurbani, teaching the true meaning of it. That alone should point out the core of Gurbani is always going to be the same. I don't mean to sound like an <banned word filter activated> but if you need a thread to remind you of family then your bond isn't as strong as you perceive it. 

There's a difference between "Talibanisation" and making coherent points. If you can provide logical proof that Guru Sahib followed this ancient hindu tradition (since its thousands of years old) then present it, we're all ears. No one's stopping you posting proof, but rather than using only your own mind, use Gurbani too. Only difference is Gurbani is 100% correct and we are not. 

Rakhshah Bandan= mentioned in Puranas , The same scriptures Guru Gobind Singh Ji told us Not  to follow, if you want proof of that feel free to read the final portion of Chaupai Sahib. Sorry but no way can someone call themselves a Sikh (not saying anything about you this is a totally seperate statement) and openly defy their father.

 

Maharaj never took part in anything that involved ritualism, this is ritualism. My argument isn't illogical for 1 simple reason. Rakshah Bandan was around then too yet they never took part in it. 

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4 hours ago, jkvlondon said:

bro answer me this ...Did ANY of the Guru Sahiban disown their children (apart from that son that altered gurbani to impress the mughal Emperor) did Guru Nanak Dev ji disown Sri Chand when he gave jawaab for any of the tasks set to test him or even when he rejected sikhi to become an udaasi? or even Pritvi Chand by Guru Ram Das ? 

Bheinji Guru Nanak Dev ji didn't pass on his legacy to disobedient son's.

Similarly Thanatos parents should give all their assets to his sister.

Just because she is a girl her virtue of being an obedient daughter is not rewarded.

Thanatos portraits himself as a true believer then why is he hanging on to financial support of those who don't follow Gurmat ie parents.

 

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8 hours ago, MrDoaba said:

Next year the thread title will be “Does wearing a rakhri mean I support RSS?”

A lot of apne need to take a few Benadryls because they’ve got a serious Hindu allergy.

Rakhri is NOT a religious ceremony anyway.

Why people can’t understand that symbolic practises are not anti-Gurmat is beyond me.

One must understand that symbolic practises and rituals are criticized in Gurbani as people had started to believe that the rituals alone had spiritual benefit. If we follow Gurbani then we wil not fall into this trap.

But by using the logic that xyz is anti-Gurmat and an empty ritual then many things in Sikhi would need a serious overhaul. Other aspects of our lives would also need rethinking.

When we get into this frame of mind you can ask whole load of ridiculous questions. You can see how quickly it becomes pagal puna to ask such bakwaas:

Many people wear a thin Kara so the Kara has become symbolic. Should we stop wearing them?

Why matha tek? It’s only symbolic.

Why do palle da rassam before Anand Karaj? It’s only symbolic. Hell why even do phere around Mahraaj during Anand Kaaraj.

Why do we have white chadaraan at the Gurdwara? It’s just a symbolic way of Mahraaj calling us the Sadh Sangat so we don't really need them.

Why have jyot at the Gurdwara? And you can’t say because ghyio purifies the air because jyot these days is always in a small cabinet tucked away in a little corner. It’s just symbolic.

Tbh why do we even have Akhand Path maryada? Much of it is symbolic.

What’s the point of the Khanda? It’s just a symbol isn’t it? Similarly why does Nihang Fauj wear Aad Chand? Just another symbol isn’t it?

Why have Amrit Sanchar? It’s just symbolic.

Why did Guru Sahiban do the rituals and symbolic practises when passing on the Gurgaddi? It was just an empty ritual and symbolic!! Will people now go and question Mahraaj?!

Why did Dhan Dhan Satguru Sri Guru Gobind Singh Ji Mahraaj wear a Kalgi? It’s only symbolic of being a King. Will we now question Mahraaj?!

The above are just a few obvious questions that can be asked but if we keep going, as I once read, we will firmly end up in Kala Afghanas camp. The missionaries are attacking Sikh left, right and centre by posing similar questions but about the fundamental concepts of Sikhi.

Please stop this Talibanisation of Sikhi Sangat Ji.

I like this post

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7 hours ago, harsharan000 said:

Congrats Mr Doaba Jee,

according to your beautful post above, with which I agree 100%, plus I could say, that at last, there is someone with common sense and truthful to Gurmat.

Once again, hats off Brother!!!

What I have seen here is, times are changing, so is the mentality of the newer generations, though more or less they are on Gurmat, but are somehow rebels, stubborn...

I really can not understand, how most of us come daily and spend sometime here apparently amicably, and still, at the least chance we spit fire, without giving a second chance, that their words, may hurt or be painful to others ....

I can not understand, how can people change their behaviour just like that ....from east to west, really disturbing and not understandable.

Referring to Brother Singhbj Singh, from his posts since he is member here, I can say he is a coolest and most peaceful person which can be found here...

I really feel sorry for him, being abused so mercilessly .... Let us ask ourselves, has he sudeenly forgotten all his manners or virtues displyed in his posts till now?

After all what was his crime, if any? 

I only saw goodness, and he has been offended for it.

Shame on all of them.

Sometimes this place is worse than a mad house. All attacking at a time to someone or the other.  That too, what for?

It is very unpleasant to see, how some can change their behaviour to the extremes, almost as fanatics... getting trapped in krodh, and spreading uneasiness/ashanti.

Let us widen the horizons of our minds, and stop blaming and accusing others for our own pettiness

Why can not we intercat with each other with respect and decency without loosing our mental balance? 

It is like a castle of cards, one card looses its balance, all others follow blindly and fall on the ground....

Remember, no matter how much we may say, we are sikhs, we are this or that, if we have no mercy or kindness in  our hearts towards others, we shall never be able to walk on the beautiful and unique path of Sikee.

God is love, and unless we learn to love and plant the virtues of mercy, of forgiveness and tolerance, we can never be able do His chintan/His Dhyan.

Only those pure of hearts and minds, (it is a state of avastha of purity, of goodness), can tread the path of Gurmat.

Jin prem kiyo, tinhee Prabh paayo.

Sat Sree Akal.

 

 

 

 

Thanks for support 

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