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Is Counselling Seen As Weak/unnecessary In Sikhi?


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Guest Nobody

A true Sikh knows that in this world their only true friend is Waheguru.

However, I am not a true Sikh, but have only recently embarked upon this path with more devotion than ever; not that my devotion is of significant amount.

This means that I know my only friend is Waheguru, but at the same time, I am not at such a stage or level where I am so connected with God that I am always happy, always in high spirits.

I would appreciate the opinions of the online Sangat regarding counselling.

Mentally, I've gone through many different highs and lows. It used to be manageable but this year my thinking has changed a lot and I am no longer able to keep everything to myself.

I have never had someone there for me to talk to, apart from a few particular friends recently. But I have never felt worse and I want to see a counsellor as I feel as though it'll help.

I am however battling myself because I feel as though as a Sikh I should be stronger and concentrate on Naam and Gurbani to help me become stronger and better. But I am a human with feelings of loneliness, and want to improve and move on now. I've kept everything in for too long now, and I feel as though now is the right time for me.

So Sangat Ji, what are your thoughts personally and/or other thoughts you have heard when it comes counselling and Sikhi? Are there any 'cases' you know of that you can share?

I feel as though I am not the only one wondering this, so please share your thoughts for everyone else too.

Thank you

Forgive me

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Nobody Jee,

we as humans have mental or physical ups and downs. And if we are down in anyway, we need help.

At physical level, it may be some sickness or a disease, at mental level it may be a nervous breakdown with its several consequences in different forms in different individuals.

Please do not consider it being weakness to ask for help from the right sources. It is all imposed manmukhta, that we men have to hide our sentiments...

Of course we have to bear to an extent, but when we see it is out of our reach, it is better to ask for help,which is common sense, otherwise we may be silly to do the contrary.

Wahiguru does not say, if you are a sikh and get sick do not go to the doctor, or do not take medicine .... You see, illness or destiny is due to past karam, which we may have to undergo by suffering it, or by paying it off with the doctors, chemists, etc .....The law of karam is quite complex....

As human beings, we should act as humans, with rationality.

The path of Gurmat or ruhaniyat, is for the mind and soul, where we have to subdue our haume,and develop strong love, and firm faith at the Lotus Feet of Wahiguru, through His simran...that is it .... and from this as a result of His grace,one will get will power, and inner strength to face any karam and stay in His hukum.

This is in nutshell, the character of a true sikh.

May God bless you.

Sat Sree Akal.

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A true Sikh knows that in this world their only true friend is Waheguru.

However, I am not a true Sikh, but have only recently embarked upon this path with more devotion than ever; not that my devotion is of significant amount.

This means that I know my only friend is Waheguru, but at the same time, I am not at such a stage or level where I am so connected with God that I am always happy, always in high spirits.

I would appreciate the opinions of the online Sangat regarding counselling.

Mentally, I've gone through many different highs and lows. It used to be manageable but this year my thinking has changed a lot and I am no longer able to keep everything to myself.

I have never had someone there for me to talk to, apart from a few particular friends recently. But I have never felt worse and I want to see a counsellor as I feel as though it'll help.

I am however battling myself because I feel as though as a Sikh I should be stronger and concentrate on Naam and Gurbani to help me become stronger and better. But I am a human with feelings of loneliness, and want to improve and move on now. I've kept everything in for too long now, and I feel as though now is the right time for me.

So Sangat Ji, what are your thoughts personally and/or other thoughts you have heard when it comes counselling and Sikhi? Are there any 'cases' you know of that you can share?

I feel as though I am not the only one wondering this, so please share your thoughts for everyone else too.

Thank you

Forgive me

Nobody ji, go for it, that's what I would advise. There is nothing wrong in getting help or asking for it when it's needed. If we were perfect, we wouldn't be here in this world. Nobody is perfect, every soul has their own share of weaknesses, so don't feel ashamed or embarrassed when you cannot cope or need a little help.

You are actually doing the right thing questioning whether you should go for counselling. Counsellors are too, God's creation, just like doctors, health professionals and friends and family members. Waheguru does not expect one to solely rely on them, but you also live in duniadhari world, meaning you need to live life as gristhi jeevan and not isolate yourself from the world. We also need to communicate with people as they are same as us souls that are here to help each other.

Every soul has the light of God in them, some more, some less, but each soul has their own duty in this world, so God sends certain souls to those who need help also. Everything and everybody belong to Waheguru, God, the one Lord.

When I go to the doctors or somebody helps me, I think of it as God sending those people for my benefit. I wish I had counselling earlier, as would have been equipped with the tools to cope with the Dukhs of life. Not everybody is able to solely rely on Gurbani alone. The Gurus could have done miracles when they wanted to make somebody better from being ill, but only could do with the Hukam of Waheguru. Living in Hukam and accepting what is happening, is what I advise, and not expect God to sort it all out, but make an effort also to ask for help yourself.

If you find that you dont get on with the counsellor, you can ask for another one instead, that you feel comfortable talking to.

You may go through some emotions or you may feel better early on in the sessions. It all depends on the methods used by the counsellor and if they are able to communicate with you on an interpersonal level. If it's not for you, then at least you would have tried it.

I found that when I had counselling, the first counsellor I did not like at all, and i got upset by the way he dealt with me, so then I said to him that I didn't want to see him, as I thought he wasn't a good counsellor and made it clear I was upset by his method.

He was fine by this, and I had to wait only a few weeks later, and was referred to somebody else, and I can say rather than giving up and not going back, she was the best counsellor I seen. It took the second session to get used to her, and I wish it didn't finish as she was brilliant.

Never feel hesitant, you won't know until you try out something.

Gurbani will work alongside the doctors methods, and help you to cope with what you are going through, so you need both, and trust Waheguru, they are there to make sure everything goes smoothly.

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This means that I know my only friend is Waheguru, but at the same time, I am not at such a stage or level where I am so connected with God that I am always happy, always in high spirits.

I think realistic expectations might help too?

Life is inevitably going to give you some knocks, being happy and in high spirits all the time isn't necessary. Sometimes a person has to go through some trials and tribulations and come out of the other end - the experience can make them stronger in future.

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Guest counselling

I am going to see a counsellor hopefully this week to help me to get over a battery.

Counsellors can teach you how to be positive and to enjoy your life instead of creating negativity or folding to any negativity and negative losers around you (slanderers, trouble makers(all haters) etc.)

Seeing the bright side, loving who you are and what and who God has made you, contentment, peace and sehaj and joy are qualities that can be brought out of you or enhanced by seeing a counsellor.

It's Kalyug and although we will indefinitely come across losers/ haters in this janam, gurbani and counsellers can teach us how to ignore their rubbish and to see life in a more simple way.

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I am going to see a counsellor hopefully this week to help me to get over a battery.

Counsellors can teach you how to be positive and to enjoy your life instead of creating negativity or folding to any negativity and negative losers around you (slanderers, trouble makers(all haters) etc.)

Seeing the bright side, loving who you are and what and who God has made you, contentment, peace and sehaj and joy are qualities that can be brought out of you or enhanced by seeing a counsellor.

It's Kalyug and although we will indefinitely come across losers/ haters in this janam, gurbani and counsellers can teach us how to ignore their rubbish and to see life in a more simple way.

Good idea.
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  • 5 months later...
Guest Nobody (OP)

I know this was posted a while ago, but I just want to point out that when thugger said "if you are not sound of mind, you cannot be sound of soul";

this helped me understand a lot. There are definitely some people I know that need to listen to that advice before they try to push through their troubles alone.

Thank you to everyone that replied to this post as well, you all really helped!

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