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Wedding Proposal/ Resta/ Rishta Questions...


Guest nervousingh
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Guest nervousingh

WJKK WJKF

My family have arranged for me to meet a girl (as a potential bride to be). I've never really been in such a situation, not done the whole dating thing either.

What do guys ask the girl? Like are there certain things i should ask/ avoid? What do girls expect the guy to ask? Or what do girls even ask?

I imagine it being very awkward :/

any advice would be very much appreciated :) thank you!

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Start with basic biodata so ask her height and weight. Take measuring tape and scales with you to check. You can also weigh and measure yourself infront of her to assert your masculinity. Ask about her education and ask to see relevant educational certificates etc on the spot. Ask if she can cook and if so, demand to see evidence if there is a kitchen available - time her making rotia, chopping thurka etc. Make it clear if you think she is too slow, girls like guys who are open and honest with their feelings.

Finally, areas of discussion such as politics, controversial issues (ragmala/dasam granth/keski) are good icebreaker questions and keep things exciting. Nobody wants to be bored in these kinds of meetings.

Good luck!

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Start with basic biodata so ask her height and weight. Take measuring tape and scales with you to check. You can also weigh and measure yourself infront of her to assert your masculinity. Ask about her education and ask to see relevant educational certificates etc on the spot. Ask if she can cook and if so, demand to see evidence if there is a kitchen available - time her making rotia, chopping thurka etc. Make it clear if you think she is too slow, girls like guys who are open and honest with their feelings.

Finally, areas of discussion such as politics, controversial issues (ragmala/dasam granth/keski) are good icebreaker questions and keep things exciting. Nobody wants to be bored in these kinds of meetings.

Good luck!

LOL

Do not do this. Although the sarcasm is obvious, I feel the need to clarify. Approving because I thought this was humorous.

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Guest nervousingh

At this stage, you're just finding out basic info about the girl. Ask her about how she is, how old is she, what kind of job does she have, etc. Ask what she's looking for in a partner. Keep it lighthearted and simple. Don't need to ask deep questions at this stage. Depending on how you're feeling, you might swap phone numbers and can then continue chatting or politely decline if you feel she isn't for you. The first few times I met girls, I was nervous. After a while, it gets easier.

Be yourself. Be honest about yourself. Don't lie or hide things because if this girl is the one you end up marrying, things will reveal themselves.

Thank you so much for your real, honest advice :) just what I was in need of.

What sort of questions did you get asked by the girls? Any that really put you on the spot?

Again, thank you for your response :)

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Guest nervousingh

Start with basic biodata so ask her height and weight. Take measuring tape and scales with you to check. You can also weigh and measure yourself infront of her to assert your masculinity. Ask about her education and ask to see relevant educational certificates etc on the spot. Ask if she can cook and if so, demand to see evidence if there is a kitchen available - time her making rotia, chopping thurka etc. Make it clear if you think she is too slow, girls like guys who are open and honest with their feelings.

Finally, areas of discussion such as politics, controversial issues (ragmala/dasam granth/keski) are good icebreaker questions and keep things exciting. Nobody wants to be bored in these kinds of meetings.

Good luck!

LOL thanks. I needed that today. Icebreakers lol I'll bare that in mind. Thank you for your well wishes :)

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Start with basic biodata so ask her height and weight. Take measuring tape and scales with you to check. You can also weigh and measure yourself infront of her to assert your masculinity. Ask about her education and ask to see relevant educational certificates etc on the spot. Ask if she can cook and if so, demand to see evidence if there is a kitchen available - time her making rotia, chopping thurka etc. Make it clear if you think she is too slow, girls like guys who are open and honest with their feelings.

Finally, areas of discussion such as politics, controversial issues (ragmala/dasam granth/keski) are good icebreaker questions and keep things exciting. Nobody wants to be bored in these kinds of meetings.

Good luck!

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!

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Thank you so much for your real, honest advice :) just what I was in need of.

What sort of questions did you get asked by the girls? Any that really put you on the spot?

Again, thank you for your response :)

It's okay. I know what it's like and it's hard when other people found their own partners.

There was nothing that put me on the spot. The first meet is always the usual questions. These are some of what I remember asking the girls I met:

How old are you?

Simple question but you might already know the answer.

Are you working? What are you doing?

Depends on whether you want someone who works or is a housewife. Also makes you think about whether you want someone in a related job or something completely different. Some people might have contact with the public so they might have more developed social skills than someone who just sits in a room on their own all day.

Where did you study/learn/train?

Just a follow-on question from above, really. Some people move around and there might be reasons for this eg trained in London but moved to Manchester because of family.

Where are you now? Are you living with family?

Useful to know. Not all girls live with family. Some live alone or with friends. Gives you an idea of the person. Are they someone who is likely to go out partying every night or turn up drunk?

Do you have any brothers or sisters? What to they do? What do your parents do?

Really just more fact finding. Are the siblings all professionals? Would you likely fit in with them? This is more about general background than anything else.

What kind of things are you into? Do you have any hobbies? How do you enjoy your spare time?

Some girls might have hobbies that are similar to yours. Or they may not really be into anything other than the usual family, eating out, watching movies and such. This just gives you more of a feel for the kind of person they are.

Do you drink/smoke/go out?

I've heard of stories where a girl admits to a little drink now and again (they say a small glass of wine) and it turns out they go out regularly and get drunk. On the other hand, some guys don't mind.

Do you eat meat?

Again, important to know for compatibility.

Why are you looking to get married now? (ie why didn't they start looking last year, or why not wait?)

It might be pressure from family. It might be because their older sibling has been married and now it's their turn. Or it might be that they feel it's the right time to settle down. This doesn't seem like an important question but I think it is. You really need to find out if this person is serious, because the last thing you want to do is waste your time with a girl who's not ready to settle.

What are you looking for in a partner?

Important. Are the qualities that she wants something that you possess? If she wants someone who's tall and works a professional job, then there's no point if you're short and a manual worker.

Have you been in a relationship before? Do you or have you had a boyfriend in the past?

It's up to you whether you want to ask this question. It's a thorny one because you risk upsetting the girl, but at the same time you might want to know. I asked all the girls I met this question but I tried to ask in a gentle, polite way.

I'm going to be really crass here. When you meet these girls, two things should be going through your mind:

1. Does this girl seem like the kind you'd be happy to marry and spend the rest of your life with?

2. Do you feel you're the right guy for her?

Think of it a bit like an interview. You need to work out whether each girl is worth spending time getting to know. Only you can place values on certain features. You might be happy that the girl is slim and long hair and turn a blind eye that she occasionally eats at Nandos. Or you might feel that you want someone who is in a professional job but would accept that she has to work late shifts, nights and/or weekends. Or you might want someone who can stay at home and be a housewife.

But at the same time remember that the girl is doing the same as you. She's checking you out, assessing whether you're a potential suitor or someone she wouldn't want to know. So you might like her but she doesn't like you. Or she likes you but you don't like her. The only thing I would say is be upfront if you're not interested. Let them know ASAP. I'd usually text the same day and say "Hey thanks for meeting up with me today. You're a nice girl but I feel we're different. Wish you all the best for the future and home you find the right person" or something like that. Alternatively, let your parents talk to each other and say no.

Be honest with yourself. If you don't think she's the one, don't spend any more time. If you don't feel you're a suitable partner for her, don't string things along. Be honest in the answers you give because you'll get found out either before marriage, or after (which is probably worse). Good luck and don't put pressure on yourself that you're gonna marry the first girl you meet. It might be the first girl, the third girl, the tenth girl...only Akal Purkh knows.

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