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Why Do All Marriages Between Sikh Women And Non-Sikh Men End In Divorce?


Guest kalyug times
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I am a white atheist man in a relationship with a Sikh lady. She is the most amazing person I have ever met. I do not try to lead her astray, I try to help her to become a better person as she does me. I actually remind her when she has not said her prayers and I tell her that she needs to visit the temple more often. I love her with all my heart, the only problem with our relationship is people like this gentleman and their opinions. I am a secret to the majority of her family and friends. Those that know about us like me and know that I am good for my girlfriend. I lead my life in an honest and honourable manner. I spend half of my year working in India and regularly help charities there. I feel like I am being punished because I was not born in a certain place and I do not believe that God would take this as acceptable behaviour.

Hey buddy! What you and your gf have does sound beautiful. I genuinely wish you guys all the best!

The problem here is that your gf happens to be punjabi. Now as punjabis we're not very accepting of you foreign folk taking our ladies!! Lol. Even if you decided to become a sikh (you'd obviously never be punjabi), you'd find that many of us would still have a problem with you. Basically, theres no winning with punjabis. So erm... good luck!

Regarding Sikhi however, pre-marital relations are not permitted. Nor are interfaith marriages!! So I hope you wont be one of those joeys clad in indian dress wanting to partake in a bogus anand karaj (sikh wedding) with your gf. Wrong on so many levels mate! Stick to a civil ceremony if you get that far ;)

All that being said though, dont let any of that come between you guys. Whether you believe in god or not, at the end of the day, you're free to make whatever decision you wish to make. Just remember you're not free from the consequence of that decision. A paradox indeed...

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  • 7 months later...

All I dream about is a seemingly nonexistent Punjabi woman who would fall in love with me, and I with her, and she would teach me the Punjabi language and I would teach her Norwegian and English, and as non Sikhs we would explore the Guru Granth Sahib and become Khalsas together during Amrit on Baisakhi and get married and live the Sikh lifestyle together in love forever. In the meantime, I'm just an absurd Norwegian-American fool with a dream of something impossibly wonderful.

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Guest Jacfsing2

All I dream about is a seemingly nonexistent Punjabi woman who would fall in love with me, and I with her, and she would teach me the Punjabi language and I would teach her Norwegian and English, and as non Sikhs we would explore the Guru Granth Sahib and become Khalsas together during Amrit on Baisakhi and get married and live the Sikh lifestyle together in love forever. In the meantime, I'm just an absurd Norwegian-American fool with a dream of something impossibly wonderful.

You don't need a woman to bring you to Sikhi; only Dhan Dhan Sri Guru Nanak Dev Ji can bring Sikhi to you. If I had any power to save anyone as simply a follower of Dhan Dhan Sri Guru Nanak Dev Ji, I wouldn't do it just for same dating-ritual. Every Gursikh will try their very best to assist you, without some ulterior motives.
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I have a question How come someone like me a Amritdhari Distar wala married to an Amritdhari Distar Wali Singhni have been divorced for the last 6 years after 17 years of marriage. It had nothing to do with cheating and stuff. If marriage is going to break it does not matter if you are a Sikh, Hindu, Christian, Atheist. You are just not meant to be with a person for life.

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Guest Jacfsing2

I have a question How come someone like me a Amritdhari Distar wala married to an Amritdhari Distar Wali Singhni have been divorced for the last 6 years after 17 years of marriage. It had nothing to do with cheating and stuff. If marriage is going to break it does not matter if you are a Sikh, Hindu, Christian, Atheist. You are just not meant to be with a person for life.

I would answer your question if you are willing to rephrase the question.
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  • 4 months later...
Guest Rajeev Agrawal

Yes i do believe that its true most of punjabi girl marriages to non punjabis end up in divorce, as not even punjabi girls but the whole punjabi community is very selfish & cunning so the same way thier girls...many of you will ask how can i say that? ans is that because my family had faced the same issue thrice... and now the foruth one is me....punjabi girls are cheaters...not even one or two but the all of them same ----

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  • 4 months later...
Guest CDNGuest
On 25/07/2014 at 2:39 PM, Ranjeet01 said:

Bhul Chuk Maf for my sexist comment but there is an element of truth of what I am going to say.

Why do many oriental girls prefer to marry White men? It is largely because women marry for status, they generally like to marry for higher status. A lot of these Sikh women who would marry out of the religion because they feel they would be getting a higher status by bagging a white guy.

There has been a concerted effort by areas in the media, particularly the Gurinder Chadha types to encourage this type of thing, by manipulating the young impressionable Sikh girls. There is a great push for our community to be

seen as oppressive and patriarchal by certain areas of the media, this makes our impressionable girls think that certain behaviours acceptable.

As long as our girls are sexually available for other communities and our culture can be defined by the confines of the White Western narrative,

Punjabis are some of the most back stabbing and hypocritical people I've ever had the misfortune of growing up around. The fact that most people have seen sikh and non sikh marriages end up in divorce doesn't surprise me. Eventually, the facade of being in a 'progressive' relationship falls aside for even the most liberal caucasian when they've come to the realization that the person they've married was after them, first and foremost, for their elevated status as a white male/female, and not for their personality, interests, views, or even looks on a base level. That being said,conversely, I find that most of the white males that are in these relationships tend to be unappealing, whether physically or otherwise and will only go after punjabi women because either they can't find anyone  within their own race or they like the idea of having a 'submissive' foreign woman. So the shallow mentality goes both ways, leading both parties to get what they want, that is, until the mask slips off years down the road. I base these observations off the past 10 years of interactions with punjabi women in the workforce. Most of the ones that chase after whites love the attention and the smug feeling of satisfaction knowing they're stickin it to their communitiy as a result of all their negative.experiences and are now 'being accepted' by the anglos. They usually tend to be very flat personality wise or in terms of looks themselves, which likely attracts other foreign males who are equally the same.

I agree with your assertion on the media and how it paints brown males, or any.minority males for that matterleading to mostly negative stereotypes which influence their position on the socio-sexual hierarchy. According to what the media tells us, it's alright for white males to be loud, assertive and confident in public; however, anyone who is a minority that is seen as being loud and dominant with a strong personality is stereotyped as likely being a gangster or "someone who has failed to assimilate". On the flip side, if your a person that plays by the rules and gets a career, you go the route that many other minority males go through unfortunately, (especially asians) of being stereotyped as being safe, docile and falling in line to the white hegemonic social structure, which is simply emasculating in the eyes of other women, including punjabi women. Essentially, what you can take from these points is that racism, which leads to segregation of communities, furthering the divide, has a huge role to play in how punjabi males are seen by white male society, which in turn, affects how females view them. 

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17 hours ago, Guest CDNGuest said:

Punjabis are some of the most back stabbing and hypocritical people I've ever had the misfortune of growing up around. The fact that most people have seen sikh and non sikh marriages end up in divorce doesn't surprise me. Eventually, the facade of being in a 'progressive' relationship falls aside for even the most liberal caucasian when they've come to the realization that the person they've married was after them, first and foremost, for their elevated status as a white male/female, and not for their personality, interests, views, or even looks on a base level. That being said,conversely, I find that most of the white males that are in these relationships tend to be unappealing, whether physically or otherwise and will only go after punjabi women because either they can't find anyone  within their own race or they like the idea of having a 'submissive' foreign woman. So the shallow mentality goes both ways, leading both parties to get what they want, that is, until the mask slips off years down the road. I base these observations off the past 10 years of interactions with punjabi women in the workforce. Most of the ones that chase after whites love the attention and the smug feeling of satisfaction knowing they're stickin it to their communitiy as a result of all their negative.experiences and are now 'being accepted' by the anglos. They usually tend to be very flat personality wise or in terms of looks themselves, which likely attracts other foreign males who are equally the same.

I agree with your assertion on the media and how it paints brown males, or any.minority males for that matterleading to mostly negative stereotypes which influence their position on the socio-sexual hierarchy. According to what the media tells us, it's alright for white males to be loud, assertive and confident in public; however, anyone who is a minority that is seen as being loud and dominant with a strong personality is stereotyped as likely being a gangster or "someone who has failed to assimilate". On the flip side, if your a person that plays by the rules and gets a career, you go the route that many other minority males go through unfortunately, (especially asians) of being stereotyped as being safe, docile and falling in line to the white hegemonic social structure, which is simply emasculating in the eyes of other women, including punjabi women. Essentially, what you can take from these points is that racism, which leads to segregation of communities, furthering the divide, has a huge role to play in how punjabi males are seen by white male society, which in turn, affects how females view them. 

This was so on point it was staggering.

One thing that I think it missed was how physical attractiveness plays a part too. I think some very pretty brown girls see themselves as too good for brown guys (or are at least made to think that way of themselves) and jump off with a white boy (or any other race) as a result. I've seen whites in office environments subtly, but persistently and carefully isolate and patronise such girls to an extent that these girls are constantly made to socialise with whites only, and a subtle but powerful pressure is applied by whites that makes us feel almost ashamed of being seen to be associating with other brown people in their environs. What's really telling for me is that I've seen that these 'isolation' techniques are also applied by Pakistani groomers as well in their early stages of grooming. My feeling is that communities with longstanding traditions of slavery, foreign colonialism, rigid class systems, pimping and harem culture have perfected the technique of grooming and 'obtaining' other females via psychological means through centuries of refining the technique whilst in absolute positions of power.  The lesson to learn is: when you are in a dominant position of power or strength, possessing females of other lesser strong communities is easy and doing this actually reinforces the power structure that exists. 

Whitey obtaining some pretty trophy brown girl is their way of saying we can have your best and sticking it to nonwhite males. lol 

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Guest Jacfsing2
3 hours ago, dallysingh101 said:

One thing that I think it missed was how physical attractiveness plays a part too. I think some very pretty brown girls see themselves as too good for brown guys (or are at least made to think that way of themselves) and jump off with a white boy (or any other race) as a result. I've seen whites in office environments subtly, but persistently and carefully isolate and patronise such girls to an extent that these girls are constantly made to socialise with whites only, and a subtle but powerful pressure is applied by whites that makes us feel almost ashamed of being seen to be associating with other brown people in their environs. What's really telling for me is that I've seen that these 'isolation' techniques are also applied by Pakistani groomers as well in their early stages of grooming. My feeling is that communities with longstanding traditions of slavery, foreign colonialism, rigid class systems, pimping and harem culture have perfected the technique of grooming and 'obtaining' other females via psychological means through centuries of refining the technique whilst in absolute positions of power.  The lesson to learn is: when you are in a dominant position of power or strength, possessing females of other lesser strong communities is easy and doing this actually reinforces the power structure that exists.  

This goes 2 ways. From Daas's personal experience from when I went to school, a lot of Non-Sikh girls were interested in seeing Daas as some guy that was seen in the same way Non-Sikhs look at pieces of steak. Women are attracted to what they are not, or the uniqueness, (and Daas was the only Sikh guy at school in a relatively Conservative part of the U.S.), the lesson of atttactiveness is don't be like the people who like you.

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