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Guest YoungFlyFlashy

Whats So Bad About Lust/kaam?

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Guest YoungFlyFlashy

I Understand over doing masturbation and things, but even that upto a certain limit can be alright. I dont understand what is wrong with having a girlfriend and spending quality time with her and maybe even pleasure with each other(Not just sex). Who are you really hurting? You are just sharing each others love and if they happen to be a great people in life and have good morals and standards of living why should it matter. I think kaam is one of the evils which is over exaggeretted in sikhism.

Just my two cents... What do you think?

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I Understand over doing masturbation and things, but even that upto a certain limit can be alright. I dont understand what is wrong with having a girlfriend and spending quality time with her and maybe even pleasure with each other(Not just sex). Who are you really hurting? You are just sharing each others love and if they happen to be a great people in life and have good morals and standards of living why should it matter. I think kaam is one of the evils which is over exaggeretted in sikhism.

Just my two cents... What do you think?

Khalsa Ji

Physical relations before marriage is forbidden by Guru Ji as stated in Mukti Nama. Kaam can be a beautiful experience if it is our servant , Kaam can be a horrendous experience if we allow it to be our master.

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I Understand over doing masturbation and things, but even that upto a certain limit can be alright. I dont understand what is wrong with having a girlfriend and spending quality time with her and maybe even pleasure with each other(Not just sex). Who are you really hurting? You are just sharing each others love and if they happen to be a great people in life and have good morals and standards of living why should it matter. I think kaam is one of the evils which is over exaggeretted in sikhism.

Just my two cents... What do you think?

no its the most powerful vice , GURU JI save me god I am stuck in the love and comfort of my family , think in real life the gf u have r u going to get old with her , i no alot of ppl that think that dating u find ppl , well they have had over 20 gf's and none wanted to go into marriage . in the old times ppl did arrange marriage and u get married , even in love marriages theyre are fights . u r hurting ur self by kaam , and moh .

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Think about this......what message does Guru Gobind Singh Jee give us in Charitropakhyan? Is that Emotional Attachment is wrong. What you think is Love is actually Lust. Your body gets used up and time,effort, body, energy is wasted on doing Lustful acts. In the end you have to go through 8.4 Million life forms/janam. Singh'o if you want to Love someone then Love your Guru! :) Have a nice day :D

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Guest MKaur

I Understand over doing masturbation and things, but even that upto a certain limit can be alright. I dont understand what is wrong with having a girlfriend and spending quality time with her and maybe even pleasure with each other(Not just sex). Who are you really hurting? You are just sharing each others love and if they happen to be a great people in life and have good morals and standards of living why should it matter. I think kaam is one of the evils which is over exaggeretted in sikhism.

Just my two cents... What do you think?

Who are you really hurting..

Wow, what a question. You are hurting yourself, your aatma and your spiritual jeevan.

In order to understand why kaam is dangerous, we have to understand our purpose as a Sikh of the Guru.

Our purpose is to remember Waheguru, follow Gurmat and gain Satgurus blessings. How do we do this? By doing simran/japping naam, doing seva, earning an honest living and sharing what we have.

So, why can't we do all that but still be in a relationship? You may know about kaam (lust), krodh (anger), lobh (greed), moh (attachment) and hankaar (pride) AKA the Panj Chor. Why are they chor or thieves? Because they steal from you. What do they steal? They steal your amrit. We all have amrit inside us, and when/if Satguru blesses us with Amrit di daat, we are able to enjoy that amrit. Hence the meaning of amritdhari.

These Panj Chor steal our amrit and take us closer to maya. But what's wrong with maya?

maya mohi visaariaa jagath pitaa prathpaal ||

In attachment to maya, they have forgotten the Father, the Cherisher of the World.

It makes us forget Waheguru. So, if our purpose as Sikhs is to remember Waheguru, anything that takes us away from Waheguru should be avoided right? What else does Satguru tell us about maya?

maaya jaevad dukh nahi sabh bhav thakae sansaar||

There is no pain as great as the pain of Maya; it drives people to wander all around the world, until they become exhausted.

All these celebrities who have an abundance of worldly wealth, flashy cars, all the women they want, huge mansions etc. Do you think they're happier than the average person? No. They experience just as much pain as everyone else on this earth.

bikh maaya dhan sanch marehi anthae hoe sabh shaar||

He collects the poisonous wealth of Maya, and then dies. In the end, it is all reduced to ashes.

How deep is that? We spend our whole lives collecting money, attaching ourselves to people, doing all these things that we think will benefit us and make us happy. But when we die, we leave it all behind. That's it. None of it goes with us! Shrouds don't have pockets.

If you're in a relationship with someone and you've been intimate with them, what if it doesn't work out? It's depressing, to put it mildly. People sit around for days on end crying and being miserable. Until they get over it and start again with someone else. And the cycle repeats itself. Does that sound like happiness to you? Read Salok Mahalla 9. It's so deep. It tells us about how everything we see is temporary. How we are wasting our entire lives when we forget the one who created us!

These panj chor should be under our control, whereas in reality, most people are slaves to their desires, lust especially.

There is no guarantee that another human being will never leave you or hurt you. They could cheat on you or do any number of things. Lust is not going to make you happy. It is false happiness. The only true happiness is gained when we jap naam and remember Waheguru.

Gur updes saach sukh jaa ko kya this upmaa kehiae||

Those who follow the Guru's teachings find true peace - how can I even describe the glory of such a person?

That's what true happiness and true peace is. Not kaam, not worldly relationships with people who can leave you or hurt you, not money or worldly wealth.

Waheguru, blessings of Satguru & Gurmat = everlasting happiness.

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Khalsa Ji

Physical relations before marriage is forbidden by Guru Ji as stated in Mukti Nama. Kaam can be a beautiful experience if it is our servant , Kaam can be a horrendous experience if we allow it to be our master.

MokhamSingh ji hit the nail on the head. We have to control kaam. Don't let is control you. There are sex addicts out there that revolve their entire existence around getting off. Their family-life suffers, their work suffers, they can't have any meaningful relationships with anyone. They can't even meditate on the naam because all they think about is sex.

I think its impossible to abstain from completely, just don't let it take over your life. Lust is just a biochemical reaction. You see someone attractive and chemicals get released in the brain that make you feel lust. That's all it is. Once you learn to master it, you will see that is just a primal reaction hardwired into our brain. Just like feeling happy, sad, or mad. Don't make it the center of your existence because then you are falling into the trap of Maya. It isn't real.

I apologize if I said anything wrong or offensive.

EDIT: I would like to add, to all those young boys obsessing over that one girl that they think is so beautiful. Or the girls who feel the same about some guy they think is so handsome. Their looks are not permanent. Eventually, they will grow old and their looks will whither away. Their bodies will become ash after they have departed. What use is it being attached to something that isn't permanent? Finding a partner that has a compatible personality is more important. You will help each other grow spiritually and hopefully you will both become jivan mukht.

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Guest gupt

I Understand over doing masturbation and things, but even that upto a certain limit can be alright. I dont understand what is wrong with having a girlfriend and spending quality time with her and maybe even pleasure with each other(Not just sex). Who are you really hurting? You are just sharing each others love and if they happen to be a great people in life and have good morals and standards of living why should it matter. I think kaam is one of the evils which is over exaggeretted in sikhism.

Just my two cents... What do you think?

Of course it doesn't harm others but it harms yourself(soul). Your body is supposed to be the temple of God so all the efforts you make is to clean you mind so that God can come inside you. However, you are destroying God's temple (body) by committing paap and pushing Vaheguru even further away from you. Instead you will bring your matt to the same level as an animal, so you will go through the 8.4 million life forms.

We are not here on this earth to do damage to ourselves but to do good to ourselves and to others. We are here to do bhagti on God so we should focus our energy on Naam.

In sikhi, kaam is seen as one of the 5 evils/thieves, so we need to get rid of this. By indulging in it continuously, kaam will only over take you and your mind will also remain a slave to it. Would you rather be a weakling, no different to anyone else. Guru sahib says a true warrior is one who conquers the 5 demons and is in love with Vaheguru.

With your thinking it doesn't sound moral at all. You're confusing love with lust. You can show lust to anybody but that doesn't mean you love them and love can be shown in many ways such as compassion and that doesn't involve touching them. You would be a disastrous role model for your children if you ever have any because your actions are no different to a prostitute. And just think about it, your wife would be giving birth to your child in the same place where she has been intimate with so many men. Its dishonourable and disrespectful to your child and really disgusting.

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^^^ Very nice replies above...

*deleted* But how do u actually hurt yourself in kaam if it feels goood

Serial killer also enjoys killing people. Robbers also enjoy rob innocent people. Mughals were enjoying what they were doing to sikhs in past.

Waheguru ji says that manukh (human) will continue to do things regardless even if it is bad. Only guidance we have is our bani, again and again guru sahib clearly states manukh to follow sikhi lifestyle in order to live our life on correct path.

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Whats So Bad About Lust/kaam? You know something is wrong about it which is why you asked the question, so basically you already have an answer deep within yourself, isn't that a fact why you asked such a question to begin with? Why don't we ever ask "whats so bad about makki di roti, sarso da saag and lassi", because there is nothing bad and we know it.

:D :D

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"whats so bad about makki di roti, sarso da saag and lassi"
Oh there is plenty bad about it! Saag forces me to put gheo in it, a lot of it! This ends up ruining my heart health :(

*jokes* Sorry I couldn't help it :tongue2:

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Whats everyones views on masturbation? Is it bad? ..how could this be explained to the panj pyaare when you ask for forgivness? How can you put masturbation in words? ...metho kaam di galti hogi ??

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