Good Communication

[Guest gupt]

WAHEGURU JI KA KHALSA!WAHEGURU JI KI FATEH!

How to improve good communication skills?

How to talk in any condition nicely? can u share any nice material related to this?

I have experienced that we should have good communication skill to convince another person. How to do that without buttering?????

Soon i hve to to search for job and i m very confuse in my talks, can't believe easily anyone, think alot about others i m unable to keep my mind focused ,very possessive kind of person with low confidence and low convincing power.

Even the person whom i love left me.......b'coz i was unable to convince him, i don't know what i should talk in which situtation etc and then we fight and he left me :sad: . PLZ DO HELP....................I WANNA IMPROVE MY PERSONALITY but don't have money to spend on psychologist who can help me improve my personality........

[OhTwadi]

A few things that can help with improving one's communication skills:

1. Never lie about anything; always be honest and direct in your speech. However sometimes you need to carefully choose the words you speak so as not to hurt the other person. For example, rather than saying "You are really bad at this" you can say, "that was good but I think if you could improve this by doing so and so". Or it would be even better to get the other person's view on how they did and then try to work with them to come up with ideas on how to improve in the future. Basically, you don't want to come off the one who is lecturing them on something, rather that you want to work with them by understanding them.

Just doing that totally changes the emotional aspect...instead of coming at a problem from a negative view, you take a positive view and encourage the person to do more.

2. Think before you speak, doing this for a mere 2 seconds will have a noticeable impact as you can choose better words. As a general rule, pick words which are positive and paint them ever so slightly with a negative tone. In essence, "negative" should be said as "not positive".

3. Always be humble, any time you talk in ego, you will hurt someone.

4. Most importantly, try to grow out of this thinking that you have to 'convince another person' of something. It does not work, especially when it comes to relationships.

5. If all else fails and you are unable to find constructive words in a situation, just say 'I don't have any value able input at this time, give me some time to think about it and I will get back to you as soon as I can'

I hope that helps, there is lots more but going by your description, this is what came to my mind.

[SunSingh]

-maintain your own integrity, no matter what.

-speak in a nice manner, so the other's feelings are not hurt.

-read books on communication. the best start is 'how to make friends and influence people' by dale carnegie. i'm sure if you google search you can find tons of guides online about communication and job interviewing, but this book is the best start.

-find out who you are as well. you seem somewhat confused on that. soul searching i not easy, but after the journey, which may be long, you will gain the confidence you seek. this will then automatically project into your speech. i recommend you begin by studying Guru ji's teachings about why we are here. listen to katha from mahapurkhs. go to www.gurmatveechar.com and listen to Baba Isher Singh ji rara wale and Baba Gurbachan Singh ji

[Guest gupt]

A few things that can help with improving one's communication skills:

1. Never lie about anything; always be honest and direct in your speech. However sometimes you need to carefully choose the words you speak so as not to hurt the other person. For example, rather than saying "You are really bad at this" you can say, "that was good but I think if you could improve this by doing so and so". Or it would be even better to get the other person's view on how they did and then try to work with them to come up with ideas on how to improve in the future. Basically, you don't want to come off the one who is lecturing them on something, rather that you want to work with them by understanding them.

Just doing that totally changes the emotional aspect...instead of coming at a problem from a negative view, you take a positive view and encourage the person to do more.

2. Think before you speak, doing this for a mere 2 seconds will have a noticeable impact as you can choose better words. As a general rule, pick words which are positive and paint them ever so slightly with a negative tone. In essence, "negative" should be said as "not positive".

3. Always be humble, any time you talk in ego, you will hurt someone.

4. Most importantly, try to grow out of this thinking that you have to 'convince another person' of something. It does not work, especially when it comes to relationships.

5. If all else fails and you are unable to find constructive words in a situation, just say 'I don't have any value able input at this time, give me some time to think about it and I will get back to you as soon as I can'

I hope that helps, there is lots more but going by your description, this is what came to my mind.

Thanx alot for u'r reply..................GOD BLESS U

[Guest gupt]

-maintain your own integrity, no matter what.

-speak in a nice manner, so the other's feelings are not hurt.

-read books on communication. the best start is 'how to make friends and influence people' by dale carnegie. i'm sure if you google search you can find tons of guides online about communication and job interviewing, but this book is the best start.

-find out who you are as well. you seem somewhat confused on that. soul searching i not easy, but after the journey, which may be long, you will gain the confidence you seek. this will then automatically project into your speech. i recommend you begin by studying Guru ji's teachings about why we are here. listen to katha from mahapurkhs. go to www.gurmatveechar.com and listen to Baba Isher Singh ji rara wale and Baba Gurbachan Singh ji

Thanks alot for u'r reply,,,,,,,,,,,,,I have taken printout of the book 'how to make friends and influence people' by dale carnegie from internet. Once again thanx i will definitely read that bookkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

[Guest -gupt-]

Thanks alot for u'r reply,,,,,,,,,,,,,I have taken printout of the book 'how to make friends and influence people' by dale carnegie from internet. Once again thanx i will definitely read that bookkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

Is book vicha toha yeha hi sab dita hai jis person naal gal karde paye ode interest da topic vicha gal karo 'how to make friends and influence people' by dale carnegie. This things are buttering. Also if my love wanna talk about sex and i don't want to talk about it more before marriage. So the only thing to impress him is to talk about sex.....this is wrong and against sikhi this is just one example if we go according to that book.

BUL CHUK MAFA!

[Guest Dhan Guru Nanak]

Penji.. do ardass to guru sahib to bless u with more confidence and self esteem... guru sahib is the only giver.. do some chaupai sahibz or any other bani u like and do ardass with pyar and sincerity.. n maharaj will help u.. dosnt matter wht kinda situtation u r in.. he is alwayz listenin and alwayz helpin us. whteva he does is for our own gud.. jus like u said if ur partner wantz to talk bout sex and u dont want to befo marriage... well tht jus givez u the indication.. ur vichaarz dont match ...maharaj ji knowz whatz gud and bad for us.. he knowz better thn us.. so be thnkful for whteva he has done and given u... with his kirpa u'll find someone even more loving and respecting and understanding... dont think its ur fault tht ur partner left u.. it could be his weaknesses.. but dont jugde.. jus be thnkful to maharaj and leave it to maharaj

be positive.. dont let the negativity come into ur mind... no one likes a negative person ... neva eva think ur not gud enough .. be proud of urself.. be proud of wht guru sahib has made u... u'll gain alot of confidence jus by being positive.. u'll be more happy and cheerful and alwayz willing to help and tht attractz alot of ppl and ppl actually listen to u when ur polite and dont crictize .. if ur happy.. u'll actually make other ppl happy.. who doesnt like bein happy.. so my whole point is be positive.. stay away from hatered, jealousy, nindeya, chugli .. n all this can happen with guru sahib kirpa... so do ardass and ask for maharaj jis blessings .. nanak naam chardi kala.. tere bhane sarbaat da bhala....

[Guest gupt]

Penji.. do ardass to guru sahib to bless u with more confidence and self esteem... guru sahib is the only giver.. do some chaupai sahibz or any other bani u like and do ardass with pyar and sincerity.. n maharaj will help u.. dosnt matter wht kinda situtation u r in.. he is alwayz listenin and alwayz helpin us. whteva he does is for our own gud.. jus like u said if ur partner wantz to talk bout sex and u dont want to befo marriage... well tht jus givez u the indication.. ur vichaarz dont match ...maharaj ji knowz whatz gud and bad for us.. he knowz better thn us.. so be thnkful for whteva he has done and given u... with his kirpa u'll find someone even more loving and respecting and understanding... dont think its ur fault tht ur partner left u.. it could be his weaknesses.. but dont jugde.. jus be thnkful to maharaj and leave it to maharaj

be positive.. dont let the negativity come into ur mind... no one likes a negative person ... neva eva think ur not gud enough .. be proud of urself.. be proud of wht guru sahib has made u... u'll gain alot of confidence jus by being positive.. u'll be more happy and cheerful and alwayz willing to help and tht attractz alot of ppl and ppl actually listen to u when ur polite and dont crictize .. if ur happy.. u'll actually make other ppl happy.. who doesnt like bein happy.. so my whole point is be positive.. stay away from hatered, jealousy, nindeya, chugli .. n all this can happen with guru sahib kirpa... so do ardass and ask for maharaj jis blessings .. nanak naam chardi kala.. tere bhane sarbaat da bhala....

thanx alot............may god bless u