Done A Sin - Worried

[Guest harleen]

hi i am scared, i have been ill for along time now, b4 i had full vishwas and pyar for god, and everytime i got worse i turned to Guruji for help and slowly used to get bk on my feet again. Now for last 3mths i deteriorated quickly becoming physically disabled and even typin is a hard task let alone think. most times i feel i am going to die. at times i lie there n do waheguruji but i cant do anything. i know i should not do this but hand on heart i didnt even realise it was a paap, and dont even realise i,m doing it, i have sworn at Guru Nanak devji and god on few ocassions. at the time i dont realise wat im doing, and also swear at family members and have like mental attacks like pagal dhore as u would say. my family think im possessed, but then i cry afterwards lots and maafi mang from guruji at wat i have done, i honestly dont want to go against god coz at end of day i know he is th only one i have alwys turned to and he alwys helpd me, but now i am so physically weak i dont realise wat i am saying or doing. my family went to see a mahapurukh n said i will get better but to be honest i dont feel i am, and i never ever wanted to say anything bad to guruji, even when path is on i dont want to listen to it, its like i feel its making me weaker, i feel god is so far from me, th more faith i have tried to put in, the worse my actions have got.

i am sooo scared i am going to die now, and that guruji wont make me better, i know now i have done very bad, and guruji wont forgive me, but i honestly dont have any control on this when it happens. i even want to die and ask god to let me go now., even thinking about suicide as i cant go on anymore, i thought god was there but feels likes he's not. i try so so hrd to keep quiet and to tolerate wat is happeing to me, but i dont evn know wats happeining myslf.

is there any mahapurukh in uk that can help me, are they all in india?

i know nobody can help me, only Sri Guru Granth Sahibji can but i feel they have left me now too. i always ask waheguruji to help me, even if i done wrong, then i think wat abt all these other people, i am soo ill dont realse wat im doing, but wat abt others that do. sory if i offended nybody, no actually sorry i offended god.

[Matheen]

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa! Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh!

Harleen Ji, please register so you can be reached by PM.

Thanks.

[TejiKaur]

Gurufateh g

i needa talk to u asap

went thro somethin similar

God will help u thro this

[Sikh_Soldier]

PM me if you like

[Kaljug Singh]

hi i am scared, i have been ill for along time now, b4 i had full vishwas and pyar for god, and everytime i got worse i turned to Guruji for help and slowly used to get bk on my feet again. Now for last 3mths i deteriorated quickly becoming physically disabled and even typin is a hard task let alone think. most times i feel i am going to die. at times i lie there n do waheguruji but i cant do anything. i know i should not do this but hand on heart i didnt even realise it was a paap, and dont even realise i,m doing it, i have sworn at Guru Nanak devji and god on few ocassions. at the time i dont realise wat im doing, and also swear at family members and have like mental attacks like pagal dhore as u would say. my family think im possessed, but then i cry afterwards lots and maafi mang from guruji at wat i have done, i honestly dont want to go against god coz at end of day i know he is th only one i have alwys turned to and he alwys helpd me, but now i am so physically weak i dont realise wat i am saying or doing. my family went to see a mahapurukh n said i will get better but to be honest i dont feel i am, and i never ever wanted to say anything bad to guruji, even when path is on i dont want to listen to it, its like i feel its making me weaker, i feel god is so far from me, th more faith i have tried to put in, the worse my actions have got.

i am sooo scared i am going to die now, and that guruji wont make me better, i know now i have done very bad, and guruji wont forgive me, but i honestly dont have any control on this when it happens. i even want to die and ask god to let me go now., even thinking about suicide as i cant go on anymore, i thought god was there but feels likes he's not. i try so so hrd to keep quiet and to tolerate wat is happeing to me, but i dont evn know wats happeining myslf.

is there any mahapurukh in uk that can help me, are they all in india?

i know nobody can help me, only Sri Guru Granth Sahibji can but i feel they have left me now too. i always ask waheguruji to help me, even if i done wrong, then i think wat abt all these other people, i am soo ill dont realse wat im doing, but wat abt others that do. sory if i offended nybody, no actually sorry i offended god.

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh!

First do what Matheen veer has suggested and register so that anyone who has gone through similar experiences can contact you.

Second, tell us (or someone here via PM) when this started, whether you believe anything triggered this experience, and whether you have sought medical attention and what the diagnosis was (and if so, what medication if any you are taking).

Most importantly, you need to let go of any guilt feelings you are harbouring - if things are beyond your control, you have no need to feel guilty. Besides, Guru ji is not going to leave His Sikh for such reasons. :-)

Also, continue to do your paath even if you do not feel it helping. Sometimes the benefits of our bhakti are not obvious but they are there nonetheless.

K.