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Gursikh Singh

Sikhs Marrying Their Own Cousins

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On the Nihal's morning discussion show (on the BBC Asian Network) they were discussing (after 10am) for an hour about religious tensions amongst the south Asian communities. A Muslim woman on the show stated that she had made a documentary on forced marriages were Sikhs were forced into marrying their own cousins. I was really shocked by this. Is this true? Does this really happen? How can such a marriage occur in a Gurdwara were a Sikh couple are each others cousins?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/aod/asiannetwor.../asiannihal_tue

Listen about 1:45 minutes into show.

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thobaa thobaa, this should not happen, you should not marry anyone from four pinds in your neighbourhood, so that counts out your family, and anyone with the same surname as you.

you should have phoned in and told them the truth.

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Not four pinds yaar... Its not into own surname, moms surname, and granny's surname...

For example my 2 bhuas are married in a neighbouring pind, but we are Doad Rajputs (our pind is, I am not into caste), and that pind is Parmar Rajput... So its okay as long as the surname isnt same. Eg. Chauhan marrying chauhan etc

Please note that this is a tradition of Punjabi culture (Islamic influence in Pakistani Punjab, have looted them of their heritage), and nowhere in SGGS is it said that one can't marry in family. Although this is best, as incest can lead to various problems in the children.

Bhul Chuk Maaf,

WJKK WJKF

Bhul Chuk Maaf,

WJKK WJKF

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That woman was lying.....even if people aren't religious, Punjabi culture doesn't allow it - it's common sense.

There are some old rehats that mention this as well.

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Wow Matheen bhaji, could you shed more light on the rehitnamas, as I always thought this was Punjabi culture.. (But I believe in it, as it is scientifically proven)

Bhul Chuk Maaf,

WJKK WJKF

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I will look through the old rehats and find it. There are some good things in Punjabi culture but to call this Punjabi culture isn't 100% correct - Punjabi Muslims sometimes marry cousins as well.

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Lying is a well known Muslim trait so I wouldn't waste time worrying about it. After all the biggest Muslim lie of recent years is that Islam means Peace when everyone knows that it means Submission!

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A show created by a muslim on the BBC asian network talking c*** about sikhs?

:rolleyes:

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I have come across this before apparently it’s done to get a Visa for a relative to come over to U.K. sick ppl out there need a few good slaps and an old fashion kicking with mojae like the ones Gabar wears in Sholay.

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from my point of view, if we believe in seeing God in everyone then in reality each and every of us become of God. Then all this man-made relations that we have mother, father, brother, wife are all false. The reality is that they are all God. so we treat all as one and same.

if one falls in true love with someone, when i say true love, i mean true selfless love, where the lover will sacrifice his/her self for his parther. If there is GOD in the love, then even marriage between a cousin is not wrong. Everyone have their own unique destiny, everyone is different, everyone in different situations

so i believe this is the natural way of living. originally, human were made so as the other species and we were at top of the chain as you guys already know. so in reality even marriage itself is man-made. There is only one marriage and thats the real marriage with God, right? so you can only follow love with one person not all? when you fall in love with GOD, you love god in every part of his creation.

gurbani says when we go higher into spirituality, we go over the panj doots, the panj doots are defeated and they cannot steal our inner-amrit that we get from God. everytime we take part in the panj doots act (lust, anger, ego, attachment and greed) our inner amrit is stolen and our soul is hurt. our soul is hurt so we are hurt. for moments of selfish satisfaction we lost the true amrit.

so when we in higher spiritual state it means we are in higher mental state as well, no depression, anxiety, absolute calmness and control. We are stable. we automatically start to have positive thinking towards life and people around you. and then what you give to the nature while you are in that state, the nature gives back to you. so if we give love, we get love. if we give hate, we get hate back, look at history, people in different countries hating each other, which resulted in war, both died. so we have to give love to everyone, we have to go beyond religion, and see god in everyone. no, i am not the man-made sikh that some people tried to make, i am the true sikh that gurbani teaches me to be. if i need help, i go to the guru for guidance, if we are searching for the truth, how can we go to anyone other than a person truthhimself, the perfect satguru?

our parents are lost in rituals themselves, guru told us not to do rituals. We have made many things as ritual especially the kes bit. people just think now a days keeping kes is what sikhi is. this why people have hell in their house if their mind is sorrounded by the 5 theieves regardles of what religious ritual they follow. god is not about religious rituals, its about the truth. we come here, follow the truth gurus message and become one with God. the perfect state, the state of absolute bliss, truth and infinite love. the 5 thieves do not dare to come to the person in that mental state anymore. He's gone above from the animal state of mind to god state of mind.

sorry if i offend everyone but i'd like to share with you guys what i believe is true.

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I have come across this before apparently it’s done to get a Visa for a relative to come over to U.K. sick ppl out there need a few good slaps and an old fashion kicking with mojae like the ones Gabar wears in Sholay.

what a film!!!!!!!! lol

kithney aadmee see?

btw thats just ew marry cuzins..

but ye ive herd what veerjee above said, to get pukka in uk..

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....if one falls in true love with someone, when i say true love, i mean true selfless love, where the lover will sacrifice his/her self for his parther. If there is GOD in the love, then even marriage between a cousin is not wrong.......

Veer Ji, unfortunately the God-made laws of genetics don't agree with your view.

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Sikhs do not marry in their own family. Sikh Panjabis traditionally do not marry anyone with teh same surname, the same surname as mom (prior to marriage). Prem Sumarag goes into detail about it apparently.

It may be a case of "visa" marriages.

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