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Don't Want To Be A Sikh.


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Guest HELP!

Dear Sangat,

I became interested in sikhism 2 years ago. I was bought up as a sikh, going gurudwara etc. My dads amritdhari and my grandad is a amritdahri giani. However, I have recently lost all interest in religion. I just don't see the point. I tried being religious, but have realised it's not for me. I do believe in a superior being (God) but don't want to follow any organised religion.

I am not amritdhari (yet...) and don't want to be. My dad's definitely going to force me to take amrit, and live my life as a sikh.

I am keshdari and go grudwara with my family regularly. I can read/write punjabi and used to do nitnem everyday (when I was religious) but I dont feel like it anymore.

Even if I do take amrit, remain keshdari, i'm not really a devout sikh. I just look like one.

The problem with being a keshdari sikh is that if you are religious you will look religious on the outside, but if you are not religious, you will still look religious on the outside whether you like it or not.

The members on this board obviously know more than me about this religion, so i would like to know your views.

Thanks in advance.

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Guest peacemaker

I'm confused. Do you want us to convince you to remain a Sikh? You didn't really leave us with a question. What exactly do you need help on? Take a hukamnama here sikhitothemax.com

This Shabad is by Guru Raam Daas Ji in Raag Jaithsree on Pannaa 697

jYqsrI mhlw 4 ]

jaithasaree mehalaa 4 ||

Jaitsree, Fourth Mehla:

ijn hir ihrdY nwmu n bisE iqn mwq kIjY hir bWJw ]

jin har hiradhai naam n basiou thin maath keejai har baa(n)jhaa ||

The Lord's Name does not abide within their hearts - their mothers should have been sterile.

iqn suM\I dyh iPrih ibnu nwvY Eie Kip Kip muey krWJw ]1]

thin su(n)n(j)ee dhaeh firehi bin naavai oue khap khap mueae karaa(n)jhaa ||1||

These bodies wander around, forlorn and abandoned, without the Name; their lives waste away, and they die, crying out in pain. ||1||

myry mn jip rwm nwmu hir mwJw ]

maerae man jap raam naam har maajhaa ||

O my mind, chant the Name of the Lord, the Lord within you.

hir hir ik®pwil ik®pw pRiB DwrI guir igAwnu dIE mnu smJw ] rhwau ]

har har kirapaal kirapaa prabh dhhaaree gur giaan dheeou man samajhaa || rehaao ||

The Merciful Lord God, Har, Har, has showered me with His Mercy; the Guru has imparted spiritual wisdom to me, and my mind has been instructed. ||Pause||

hir kIriq kljuig pdu aUqmu hir pweIAY siqgur mwJw ]

har keerath kalajug padh ootham har paaeeai sathigur maajhaa ||

In this Dark Age of Kali Yuga, the Kirtan of the Lord's Praise brings the most noble and exalted status; the Lord is found through the True Guru.

hau bilhwrI siqgur Apuny ijin gupqu nwmu prgwJw ]2]

ho balihaaree sathigur apunae jin gupath naam paragaajhaa ||2||

I am a sacrifice to my True Guru, who has revealed the Lord's hidden Name to me. ||2||

drsnu swD imilE vfBwgI siB iklibK gey gvwJw ]

dharasan saadhh miliou vaddabhaagee sabh kilabikh geae gavaajhaa ||

By great good fortune, I obtained the Blessed Vision of the Darshan of the Holy; it removes all stains of sin.

siqguru swhu pwieAw vf dwxw hir kIey bhu gux swJw ]3]

sathigur saahu paaeiaa vadd dhaanaa har keeeae bahu gun saajhaa ||3||

I have found the True Guru, the great, all-knowing King; He has shared with me the many Glorious Virtues of the Lord. ||3||

ijn kau ik®pw krI jgjIvin hir auir DwirE mn mwJw ]

jin ko kirapaa karee jagajeevan har our dhhaariou man maajhaa ||

Those, unto whom the Lord, the Life of the world, has shown Mercy, enshrine Him within their hearts, and cherish Him in their minds.

Drm rwie dir kwgd Pwry jn nwnk lyKw smJw ]4]5]

dhharam raae dhar kaagadh faarae jan naanak laekhaa samajhaa ||4||5||

The Righteous Judge of Dharma, in the Court of the Lord, has torn up my papers; servant Nanak's account has been settled. ||4||5||

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vaheguru ji ka khalsa vaheguru ji ki fateh

What exactly do you mean by you "don't want to follow any organised religion."

I'd recommend reading as much Gurbani as possible, preferably doing a Sehaj Paath (with translations/meanings if needed), before making your final decision.

vaheguru ji ka khalsa vaheguru ji ki fateh

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I used to think whats the point of all this 'religious' stuff, and think that they were all pretty much the same. Infact, I was an atheist. the idea of God sitting on some lil chair and controllin the world never made sence, and ontop of that, why would we have to praise him? wouldnt that make him selfish and egotistical? the concept never made sence. untill..i began to understood a lil more bout sikhi.

I realised after that i had known nothing about sikhi. I'm not trying to infer that you dont know much about sikhi, well perhaps i am, because if you did know what sikhi was really about, the 'dont wana be a sikh' would never come to mind.

Please dont get sikhi confused with religion, its a dharma, a way of life, truth.

Sikhi is a beautiful journey of self-discovery, realising your true nature, that we are all one - one energy, one being, that we are God itself.

Take a glance at our rich history - Brahmgyaani Baba Deep Singh ji, who fought with his HEAD IN HIS HAND - VAH! not many people can do that.

you know WHY he was able to do that? cos he was ONE with everything, through kamai and understanding and submission to Bani.

Paji, sikhi is a jewel, PLEASE, benti from you sister, before you decide to 'give it up', put it under a magnifying glass and see how beatiful it is, once you realise its beauty, you wont ever want to look away.

aap pashhaanai th eaekai jaana - know/understand yourself, then you will know THE one.

I aplogise if i confused you even more, or offended you.

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I advise you to do this, and do it with full effort. If you still feel nothing after then I wont say anything on that, but without doing this atleast, dont quit.

With FULL EFFORT and the want to understand Sikhi

-Do a proper Ardas to Guru Nanak Dev Ji Maharaj, he understands all he knows what is in your heart so dont be hesitant to say to Guru Nanak Dev Ji exactly as you feel, i.e. "sorry Guru Ji I don't understand this, I dont have faith in you, but I want you to have mercy on me", something like that but exactly as you feel. Believe me have a full conversation with him, be completley open.

-Take a Hukamnama after this, and make effort to understand it all, this is Guru Sahib's living reply to your ardas. In humility and reading from the angle that Guru Sahib is indeed higher than you try to understand and apply this to your situation. Follow what is told

-Do another ardas and then go to your next local Akj Rainsabhai and try to sit through the night.

Make an effort to actually understand bani, start by reading translations of nitnem and also taking a hukamnama and reading the meaning everyday.

PLEASE feel free to private message me before you take a huge step such as leaving Sikhi.

I have taken a hukamnama for you, make sure to take more yourself.

This Shabad is by Guru Arjan Dev Ji in Siree Raag on Pannaa 52

isrIrwgu mhlw 5 ]

sireeraag mehalaa 5 ||

Siree Raag, Fifth Mehla:

sMq jnhu suix BweIho CUtnu swcY nwie ]

sa(n)th janahu sun bhaaeeho shhoottan saachai naae ||

O Saints, O Siblings of Destiny, listen: release comes only through the True Name.

gur ky crx sryvxy qIrQ hir kw nwau ]

gur kae charan saraevanae theerathh har kaa naao ||

Worship the Feet of the Guru. Let the Name of the Lord be your sacred shrine of pilgrimage.

AwgY drgih mMnIAih imlY inQwvy Qwau ]1]

aagai dharagehi ma(n)neeahi milai nithhaavae thhaao ||1||

Hereafter, you shall be honored in the Court of the Lord; there, even the homeless find a home. ||1||

BweI ry swcI siqgur syv ]

bhaaee rae saachee sathigur saev ||

O Siblings of Destiny, service to the True Guru alone is True.

siqgur quTY pweIAY pUrn AlK AByv ]1] rhwau ]

sathigur thut(h)ai paaeeai pooran alakh abhaev ||1|| rehaao ||

When the True Guru is pleased, we obtain the Perfect, Unseen, Unknowable Lord. ||1||Pause||

siqgur ivthu vwirAw ijin idqw scu nwau ]

sathigur vittahu vaariaa jin dhithaa sach naao ||

I am a sacrifice to the True Guru, who has bestowed the True Name.

Anidnu scu slwhxw scy ky gux gwau ]

anadhin sach salaahanaa sachae kae gun gaao ||

Night and day, I praise the True One; I sing the Glorious Praises of the True One.

scu Kwxw scu pYnxw scy scw nwau ]2]

sach khaanaa sach painanaa sachae sachaa naao ||2||

True is the food, and true are the clothes, of those who chant the True Name of the True One. ||2||

swis igrwis n ivsrY sPlu mUriq guru Awip ]

saas giraas n visarai safal moorath gur aap ||

With each breath and morsel of food, do not forget the Guru, the Embodiment of Fulfillment.

gur jyvfu Avru n idseI AwT phr iqsu jwip ]

gur jaevadd avar n dhisee aat(h) pehar this jaap ||

None is seen to be as great as the Guru. Meditate on Him twenty-four hours a day.

ndir kry qw pweIAY scu nwmu guxqwis ]3]

nadhar karae thaa paaeeai sach naam gunathaas ||3||

As He casts His Glance of Grace, we obtain the True Name, the Treasure of Excellence. ||3||

guru prmysru eyku hY sB mih rihAw smwie ]

gur paramaesar eaek hai sabh mehi rehiaa samaae ||

The Guru and the Transcendent Lord are one and the same, pervading and permeating amongst all.

ijn kau pUrib iliKAw syeI nwmu iDAwie ]

jin ko poorab likhiaa saeee naam dhhiaae ||

Those who have such pre-ordained destiny, meditate on the Naam.

nwnk gur srxwgqI mrY n AwvY jwie ]4]30]100]

naanak gur saranaagathee marai n aavai jaae ||4||30||100||

Nanak seeks the Sanctuary of the Guru, who does not die, or come and go in reincarnation. ||4||30||100||

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Dude do you get sangat of sikhs your age? You need to talk to a Gursikh your age, and find the reason why you feel the way you do.

If you haven't go to Sikhi camp where you will find others who may have felt the way as you have.

Even some of the youth programmes or kids camps.

Dear Sangat,

I became interested in sikhism 2 years ago. I was bought up as a sikh, going gurudwara etc. My dads amritdhari and my grandad is a amritdahri giani. However, I have recently lost all interest in religion. I just don't see the point. I tried being religious, but have realised it's not for me. I do believe in a superior being (God) but don't want to follow any organised religion.

I am not amritdhari (yet...) and don't want to be. My dad's definitely going to force me to take amrit, and live my life as a sikh.

I am keshdari and go grudwara with my family regularly. I can read/write punjabi and used to do nitnem everyday (when I was religious) but I dont feel like it anymore.

Even if I do take amrit, remain keshdari, i'm not really a devout sikh. I just look like one.

The problem with being a keshdari sikh is that if you are religious you will look religious on the outside, but if you are not religious, you will still look religious on the outside whether you like it or not.

The members on this board obviously know more than me about this religion, so i would like to know your views.

Thanks in advance.

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Dear Sangat,

I became interested in sikhism 2 years ago. I was bought up as a sikh, going gurudwara etc. My dads amritdhari and my grandad is a amritdahri giani. However, I have recently lost all interest in religion. I just don't see the point. I tried being religious, but have realised it's not for me. I do believe in a superior being (God) but don't want to follow any organised religion.

I am not amritdhari (yet...) and don't want to be. My dad's definitely going to force me to take amrit, and live my life as a sikh.

I am keshdari and go grudwara with my family regularly. I can read/write punjabi and used to do nitnem everyday (when I was religious) but I dont feel like it anymore.

Even if I do take amrit, remain keshdari, i'm not really a devout sikh. I just look like one.

The problem with being a keshdari sikh is that if you are religious you will look religious on the outside, but if you are not religious, you will still look religious on the outside whether you like it or not.

The members on this board obviously know more than me about this religion, so i would like to know your views.

Thanks in advance.

In your heart you'll know when you want to be religious or not. If inside you are not ready then no point pretending to be GurSikh outwardly. I see too many people who outwardly are keshdhari and amritdhari yet are weak when it comes to the 5 vices.

Being Sikh is about growing spiritually inside first then outwardly it will come in time. bottomline is...It shouldnt be forced upon you....

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^^^

that's okay advice.. but it has serious implications as future parents.

should parents then cut their children's hair, for example, and let them find the sikhi internally since simply carrying the outer isn't enough?? being a parent involves quite a large degree of brainwshing... you want your kids to act a certain way and do certain things, so you reward them when they do things that match this, and reprimand them when they do the opposite.

I totally agree with you, that there has to be an internal grace and an internal "chaah" to want to be "religious"... but i don't think it has to come at the expense of the outside.

The poster seems to just be uninspired to follow a religious path... and I totally agree with him/her.. and on that front, i entirely agree with Mindless' post.

Unfortunately, the poster seems to live in a household where he/she feels that the spirituality, the self-journey is not encouraged as much as are robotic practices... ( major disclaimer: i'm not calling nitnem robotic.. i'm saying it's robotic if there's no sharda or desire to do it or what not, AND i think we've all been in a place where we've realized we're just saying words and not really feeling the bani)

so as mindless said... pursue a higher plane of thoughts to discover who you are... Read spiritual books, read books of high quality. If you don't have good sangat around you, then make good books and gurbaani your sangat... and most of all, find out who you are and where you fit in this Grand Play. But do it honestly... because anyone can just conclude that "well my place is as a free-spirited spiritual dude that thinks everything is just awesome and everything is a form of devotion". Discipline and actions that encourage discipline are not bad things

and then, Peace, Comfort, and Solace are sure to follow, hopefully!

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