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waheguroo ji ka khalsa waheguroo ji ki fateh..veerji divine journey...well..you got the answer to the question..we are like lotus...as per Guru Nanak Dev Ji maharaj said..and may i ask you..you have sex...the whole time...well when ever you wan..then u think ur wiser than guru maharaj?cause guru maharaj said stay away from the 5 evil ones...and u here state that..its ok to have sex how many times u wan!...theres this sant ji..who said...if u wana have sex in 6 months time once..no prob...once a month...no prob...once a week..no prob..but if u still cant control...than ur not a sikh of the guru!y u think they said tht...n btw..y do u wan ahave so much sex ???sex is just to have for babaies...but if u cant control..well its ok...but u wana have sex like a lot of ttimes!...then whats the use!u cant concentrate on naam...can u?..bhul chuk maaaf..wjkk wjkf!

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First I feel that if v go overboard over the issue of sex then i guess its gonna surely create problem for us...n there is no need to put the sex into any kinda time frame that u can have once in a week or once in a month or once in a six week..then u will all the time wating for this 'Jugment day' only and count down will always there at the bak of our mind...lol....its sooo absurd...u eat when u feel like eating..u shud sleep when u feel sleepy dance when u feel like dancing...if u put it all these activites into a kinda of time frame then it gonna make our life hell...like even if u dont want to have food u go out n stuff ur tummy juss coz it TIME to eat ..same goes wid sex....have when u feel like...dont have wehn u dont feel likewise.... (SEHAJ rang rach raheaa)..u can go whole life without having sex(ahem ahem sounds bit harsh??) if u have understood the love....we all have made the phenomenon of sex a big taboo by goin overboard and deeming it someting 'extraordinary'...that where i guess things start to go wrong...if we deem sex as natural as laughing as natural as sleep as natural as ne other activity we do then i think things can be sorted out...neigher shud v look down upon the activity of sex nor shud we burden ourselves wid sex...full stop.

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VJKKVJKF

I dont agree here with Khalsa pajis using word 'Pleasure' here...i think there is no relationship between having a good life style and ur spiritual being..u can be religious while having allll world pleasures including sex..i think its a state of mind..it has nuffin to do that what kinda and how costly ur horse is and how costly ur bed is and how befultiul ur wife/hubby is and all that....and wat kinda clothes ur wear and all dat......

i dont think sikhi is against enjoying the worldly pleasure...its not a marg of tyagi (cowards)(read my signature)...its a marg of brave (gristhis).....u gotta live like Lotus in the mud...although Lotus gets the food from this mud (sansaar) but it always raised above this mud (its never OBSSESSED with it)

u can be religious while having allll world pleasures including sex
i dont think sikhi is against enjoying the worldly pleasure

What can you possibly gain from repeated lust of your partner? You think orgasms are going to bring you closer to Vaheguru? Good luck "divine journey". I'm starting to wonder what you meant by "divine" journey.

Sex for pleasure; it is not a necessity. Food, rest and water are vital for our being. Sexual pleasure is a desire not a need, and we all know Sikhi promotes adopting a humble lifestyle. How could you possibly attain humble and respectful characteristics when you’re indulging in your partner? Your wife is not an activity that you can use and play with when you feel like it. He or she is your husband or wife. Maybe you should look up what a husband and wife is; I’ll even buy you the dictionary.

If Sikhi is against anything, it is against unnecessary pleasure, and unnecessary desire.

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Hello sangat this is my first post.

I had question about sikhism..

After marriage,  Is it ok to have sex everday?  Also,  Is it wrong to be sexually active during marriage when it has no purpose (purpose: having a baby).  ?

i dont want to be rude but this is what i wanted to  know and i am sorry if i am asking the wrong question.

Discuss blush.gif

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Kaam is an unatural attachment to sexual pleasure. If you mfeel you wish to have sex everyday then by all means cary on, BUT ask yourself this, are you becoming addicted to the pleasure associated with sex.

Is it controlling your life. Like a drug addict addicted to drugs, has sex become an addiction that cotrols your life, rather than you controlling sex.

To answer you question is it OK to be sexually active during marriage, even when a baby is not the end result then yes, but always bare in mind the sddictive nature of the 5 vices, and Kaam being one of them. :TH:

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VJKKVJKF
I dont agree here with Khalsa pajis using word 'Pleasure' here...i think there is no relationship between having a good life style and ur spiritual being..u can be religious while having allll world pleasures including sex..i think its a state of mind..it has nuffin to do that what kinda and how costly ur horse is and how costly ur bed is and how befultiul ur wife/hubby is and all that....and wat kinda clothes ur wear and all dat......

i dont think sikhi is against enjoying the worldly pleasure...its not a marg of tyagi (cowards)(read my signature)...its a marg of brave (gristhis).....u gotta live like Lotus in the mud...although Lotus gets the food from this mud (sansaar) but it always raised above this mud (its never OBSSESSED with it)

u can be religious while having allll world pleasures including sex
i dont think sikhi is against enjoying the worldly pleasure

What can you possibly gain from repeated lust of your partner? You think orgasms are going to bring you closer to Vaheguru? Good luck "divine journey". I'm starting to wonder what you meant by "divine" journey.

Sex for pleasure; it is not a necessity. Food, rest and water are vital for our being. Sexual pleasure is a desire not a need, and we all know Sikhi promotes adopting a humble lifestyle. How could you possibly attain humble and respectful characteristics when you’re indulging in your partner? Your wife is not an activity that you can use and play with when you feel like it. He or she is your husband or wife. Maybe you should look up what a husband and wife is; I’ll even buy you the dictionary.

If Sikhi is against anything, it is against unnecessary pleasure, and unnecessary desire.

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Sinner dont be so harsh to judge.

Remeber food can be associated with Greedn (Lobh) which is on par with Kaam, as one of the 5 vices. So a necessity for food can become addiction, just like the necessity to have sex can become an addiction (which known as Kaam)

For example, I get real pleasure from eating White Channay, and cant get enough. That could easily turn into an obsession and greed if I don't control it. :TH:

you said

If Sikhi is against anything, it is against unnecessary pleasure, and unnecessary desire.

I would modify this and say that Sikhi is against the obsession with pleasure and desire not with the pleasure or desire itself. We may get a desire to read, or pleasure from exercise, but hen we become obsessed with these things and ignore all and sunder, then we are creating problems.

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ang 760

Page 760

raag soohee mehulaa 5 ghur 3

Raag Soohee, Fifth Mehl, Third House:

ik ounkaar sathigur prusaadh

One Universal Creator God. By The Grace Of The True Guru:

mithun moh agan sok saagur

Attachment to sex is an ocean of fire and pain.

kar kirupaa oudhur har naagur

By Your Grace, O Sublime Lord, please save me from it. ||1||

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Divine Journey, you talk about this lotus coming out of mud.

I just wold like to emphasise on the fact that lotus flowers grow from nutrients and water :@ Not the mud itself.

THINK about it..

Sikhi isnt agaisnt sex, but against the misuse of sex - kaam - (ie: the mud). If the lotus flower starts to suck up mud itself, it will wither and die form suffocation. Same with Sikhi and sex for fun (kaam)

However, sex (the nutirients inside the mud) is part of gristhi life.. Since without it we cannot reproduce and therefore spread Sikhi etc etc.

:@

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Divine Journey, you talk about this lotus coming out of mud.

I just wold like to emphasise on the fact that lotus flowers grow from nutrients and water :@ Not the mud itself.

THINK about it..

Sikhi isnt agaisnt sex, but against the misuse of sex - kaam - (ie: the mud). If the lotus flower starts to suck up mud itself, it will wither and die form suffocation. Same with Sikhi and sex for fun (kaam)

However, sex (the nutirients inside the mud) is part of gristhi life.. Since without it we cannot reproduce and therefore spread Sikhi etc etc.

:@

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:@ urm...

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soz i only read the last two replies so i hope what i say does relate to all this.

seems K_singh veerji is saying that someone got kaam if they sleeping with their partner for any other reason other than having a little kid.

but i thought Randip Singh bro posted something some time back to show kaam was when a person got too much lust or something.

cant it be ok if all ur doing is trying to become closer as H&W?

er, say when 2 ppl get married but they do not want to have a kid yetty so does that mean they keep their distance till then.

im just saying isnt it a good way to feel closer to one another, a way to start the closeness cos from physically close u become emotionally or mentally or whichever word applies?

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^

You are told to live a GRISHTI Jeevan, not to become a Renounciate. This isn't a black and white issue. If the desire to create a much more deeper relation with your Significant Other is present, then Sex can definelty assist in the matter as the sacredness of the act itself create a vulnerability where both of the individuals can create a much more deeper bond. To surrender your body to your husband or wife is also an act of Love. The Love between 2 people is the beginning, the Sufis have called it Majaji Ishq, it is a step towards the ultimate Love of Haqiqi Ishq.

Sex is at a very low level of Love, the physical connection can also produce spiritual experiences, but this happens on a very rare occasion and even so is more dependent on the individuals.

As there are possibilites of greater good thru a Sexual Relationship between 2 married couple then as there are dangers. The danger obviously are when this Love becomes confined to the Sexuality and creates an addiction where Sex becomes a necessity rather than an expression of a deep Love and surrender.

I have posted this many times before, and here it is again:

Once I was on a journey and someone asked me which word in a man's vocabulary was the most valuable. My reply was, "Love". The man was surprised. He said he had expected me to answer "soul" or

"God". I laughed and said, "Love is God."

Raising on the ray of love one can enter the enlightened kingdom of God. It is better to say that love is God than to say that truth is God, because the harmony, the beauty, the vitality and the bliss that are part of love are not part of truth. Truth is to be known; love is to be felt as well as known. The growth and perfection of love lead to the ultimate merger with God.

The greatest poverty of all is the absence of love. The man who has not developed the capacity to love lives in a private hell of his own. A man who is filled with love is in heaven. You can look at man as a wonderful and unique plant, a plant that is capable of producing both nectar and poison. If a man lives by hate he reaps a harvest of poison; if he lives by love he gathers blossoms laden with nectar.

If I mold my life and live it with the well-being of all men in mind, that is love. Love results from the awareness that you are not separate, not different from anything else in existence. I am in you; you are in me. This love is religious. The doors of love only open for the person who is prepared to let his ego go. To surrender one's ego for someone else is love; to surrender one's ego for all is divine love.

Love is not sexual passion. Those who mistake sex for love remain empty of love. Sex is only a passing manifestation of love. It is part of nature's mechanism, a method of procreation. Love exists on a higher plane, and as love grows, sex dissipates. The energy that has been manifested in sex is transformed into love.

Love is the creative refinement of sex energy. And so, when love reaches perfection, the absence of sex automatically follows. A life of love, an abstinence from physical pleasures is called brahmacharya, and anyone who wishes to be free from sex must develop his capacity to love. Freedom from sex cannot be achieved through supression. Liberation from sex is only possible through love.

I have said that love is God. This is the ultimate truth. But let me say as well that love also exists within the family unit. This is the first step on the journey to love, and the ultimate can never happen if the beginning has been absent. Love is responsible for the existence of the family and when the family unit moves apart and its members spread out into society, love increases and grows. When a man's family has finally grown to incorporate all of mankind, his love becomes one with God.

Without love man is an individual, an ego. He has no family; he has no link with other people. This is gradual death. Life, on the other hand, is interrelation.

Love surpasses the duality of the ego. This alone is truth. The man who thirsts for truth must first develop his capacity to love—to the point where the difference between the lover and the beloved disappears and only love remains.

When the light of love is freed from the duality of lover and the beloved, when it is freed from the haze of seer and seen, when only the light of pure love shines brightly, that is freedom and liberation.

I urge all men to strive for that supreme freedom.

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^

You are told to live a GRISHTI Jeevan, not to become a Renounciate.  This isn't a black and white issue.  If the desire to create a much more deeper relation with your Significant Other is present, then Sex can definelty assist in the matter as the sacredness of the act itself create a vulnerability where both of the individuals can create a much more deeper bond.  To surrender your body to your husband or wife is also an act of Love.  The Love between 2 people is the beginning,  the Sufis have called it Majaji Ishq, it is a step towards the ultimate Love of Haqiqi Ishq. 

Sex is at a very low level of Love, the physical connection can also produce spiritual experiences, but this happens on a very rare occasion and even so is more dependent on the individuals. 

As there are possibilites of greater good thru a Sexual Relationship between 2 married couple then as there are dangers.  The danger obviously are when this Love becomes confined to the Sexuality and creates an addiction where Sex becomes a necessity rather than an expression of a deep Love and surrender. 

I have posted this many times before, and here it is again:

Once I was on a journey and someone asked me which word in a man's vocabulary was the most valuable. My reply was, "Love". The man was surprised. He said he had expected me to answer "soul" or

"God". I laughed and said, "Love is God."

Raising on the ray of love one can enter the enlightened kingdom of God. It is better to say that love is God than to say that truth is God, because the harmony, the beauty, the vitality and the bliss that are part of love are not part of truth. Truth is to be known; love is to be felt as well as known. The growth and perfection of love lead to the ultimate merger with God.

The greatest poverty of all is the absence of love. The man who has not developed the capacity to love lives in a private hell of his own. A man who is filled with love is in heaven. You can look at man as a wonderful and unique plant, a plant that is capable of producing both nectar and poison. If a man lives by hate he reaps a harvest of poison; if he lives by love he gathers blossoms laden with nectar.

If I mold my life and live it with the well-being of all men in mind, that is love. Love results from the awareness that you are not separate, not different from anything else in existence. I am in you; you are in me. This love is religious. The doors of love only open for the person who is prepared to let his ego go. To surrender one's ego for someone else is love; to surrender one's ego for all is divine love.

Love is not sexual passion. Those who mistake sex for love remain empty of love. Sex is only a passing manifestation of love. It is part of nature's mechanism, a method of procreation. Love exists on a higher plane, and as love grows, sex dissipates. The energy that has been manifested in sex is transformed into love.

Love is the creative refinement of sex energy. And so, when love reaches perfection, the absence of sex automatically follows. A life of love, an abstinence from physical pleasures is called brahmacharya, and anyone who wishes to be free from sex must develop his capacity to love. Freedom from sex cannot be achieved through supression. Liberation from sex is only possible through love.

I have said that love is God. This is the ultimate truth. But let me say as well that love also exists within the family unit. This is the first step on the journey to love, and the ultimate can never happen if the beginning has been absent. Love is responsible for the existence of the family and when the family unit moves apart and its members spread out into society, love increases and grows. When a man's family has finally grown to incorporate all of mankind, his love becomes one with God.

Without love man is an individual, an ego. He has no family; he has no link with other people. This is gradual death. Life, on the other hand, is interrelation.

Love surpasses the duality of the ego. This alone is truth. The man who thirsts for truth must first develop his capacity to love—to the point where the difference between the lover and the beloved disappears and only love remains.

When the light of love is freed from the duality of lover and the beloved, when it is freed from the haze of seer and seen, when only the light of pure love shines brightly, that is freedom and liberation.

I urge all men to strive for that supreme freedom.

141812[/snapback]

really thoughtful and deep post as usual pheena..... :music:

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