Jump to content

Search the Community

Showing results for tags 'relationship'.



More search options

  • Search By Tags

    Type tags separated by commas.
  • Search By Author

Content Type


Forums

  • GENERAL
    • WHAT'S HAPPENING?
    • GUPT | ANONYMOUS
    • GURBANI | SCRIPTURES | REHAT | HISTORY
  • COMMUNITY
    • POLITICS | MEDIA | FEEDBACK | LIFESTYLE
    • HEALTH | FITNESS | DIET
    • Agree to Disagree
  • MEDIA
  • SEWADARS

Found 11 results

  1. Jatt girl tharkhan boy

    Hi, I have an issue which shouldn't be an issue but it's eating me. I'm a Tharkhan boy and have been speaking to this Jatt girl (excuse the caste labels but that's the only way I can explain it), we both like each other and would like a future together I.e marriage. The problem I have is that she has a fear that her parents will not accept me as I am not a jatt, I've tried explaining to her Sikhi has no caste system and what our ancestors did for a living has no meaning in today's society. We are both professionals but ever since she overheard her parents mention they would only accept jatt as a partner for her, she has been very distance, she doesn't want to stop talking but also doesn't know what future will hold. We both have feelings for one another but how can i get her to overcome this fear she has? Any help or advice would be very appreciated and I can understand this issue may have been talked about a lot in past. Thanks
  2. Relationship help

    Hi, I am getting married in a couple of months, wife is about 7 yrs younger than me (I'm 25, she's 18). Parents want me to have kids but I want to let my wife settle down and get comfortable before we think of children (I have said 2-3 years). I have advised parents of this and have clearly said "I don't want to talk about this", however I fear my mother may speak with my wife directly. I have spoken with wife numerous times on phone, haven't seen her as I am not in India and she seems very caring with good nature and I don't want to do anything that may cause her to think she is being forced, rather I want her to trust me and for that, I will need to give her time given her age and her personality/ nature. My parents are quiet at the moment, but I am not happy and have advised them to not speak with me regarding my personal life, anything else is good. Please advise
  3. Fallen for a gursikh

    I've been married for years. My husband and I were blessed with Amrit and have children. Our relationship isn't bad but it's never been what I've wanted. There was always somthing missing. And by accident I've met somone, a gursikh who's so bless and in turn knows the consequences of a forbidden love . and I think I've fallen in love and they feel the same. What can I do. I don't want to live if I can't live with him. This is more than infatuation. The way I feel... I'd take the churasee lakh smiling in hopes we can be each other's in another life.
  4. Waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ke fateh I need help. please dont ignore this post I had marriage proposal(Rishta) last month. Me and my family accept that rishta. Rishta was from gursikh family. I started talking to that girl every day and first things were ok but now i dont like her behaviour. So i decided to do ardass and take hukamnama . Can someone please help me what guru sahib is saying in hukamnama. Ang 353 Devghandari mahala 5 Ulti re man ulti re
  5. Wanting to marry a muslim

    Hello, I am not sure if my previous post was successful but my name is Simran and I have fallen in love with a muslim man. I want to marry him but I'm unsure of the reaction I will receive when introducing a muslim man to my family. He is 24 and I am 23. I would really appreciate your views on an interfaith marriage, more specifically a sikh-muslim marriage, and any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you. Simran.
  6. Destroyed In Marriage

    Hi all, Sorry for long post, all Information is necessary to understand the situation. I got engaged to a girl in India in March 2015. I felt she didn’t want to talk to me when I called her, when I talk to my parents, they said the marriage broker(aka “vichola” who was also the girl`s nana) told you and us that girl is very nice, cultured and shy, that’s why she doesn’t talk. Everytime I called her, I asked everything, she never ask me anything and only answered in yes, no, um….I again talk to my parents but they scold me, I didn’t say anything again. We all went to India and I got married in December 2015, we got home from the marriage at 8:30 pm. First thing girl says when I walk inside room, “I got married against my will”. Next morning, she says “If you touch me, I will commit suicide”. Third day, she points at the newspaper article as if to show me “Girl killed by in-laws over dowry”. We didn’t even ask or take a single item from the girl`s family. I didn’t say anything to parents for they didn’t listen to me earlier and I wanted to kill myself, but couldn’t out of love for my parents. I would also take my food where I was alone and chuck it to the street dogs or in the bin, only having 3 roti each day. In three days, my life was destroyed. I prayed to him, who knows everything and asked for his help. We went to girl`s house and lived there for a week, girl slept with her mom all days and we slept on the floor, while her family sleep on beds. I talk to her parents about her behaviour and her dad says “Do not tell your parents, we will talk to her”. When we come back to our house, girl says “If you tell anyone about all this, the consequences will be very bad for you and your family”. I was completely destroyed and prayed to god to save us all from this mess. Her file was sent to immigration with the wrong draft, my dad had the correct draft amount but no one listened to him. Since we were to move back to our country, we had given address of girl on visa application. The file got rejected and vichola said can you give correct amount and post the file. He sent the file to us and sorry for language, that fkin took the draft money my dad paid for the application. I told my dad to not send the file until I say. He said why, but I didn’t say anything. We came back and I told my parents everything, blaming them both for what happened. I said you didn’t listen to me and put me in this mess, maybe if you listened to me, instead of arguing and scolding, I might have told you earlier. However, god saved us all and I hope I can become a better person and a better sikh. I suffered for 5 weeks, not able to say anything and fearing for my family`s safety. That vichola fker didn’t tell us: - Girl had epilepsy and she becomes unconscious - She was taking medicines, which I saw in her purse - He propose this alliance so she could get a visa, fk those filthy pigs vichola, girl and her family. I hope they don’t even get a place in hell. - That she was married against her will. When we go back to our country, vichole also came because his son lived here and both father/son proposed this alliance. He came to our house and said “If you don’t bring the girl here, then the girl and her family can do anything in India”. Fkin threaten us, we told our lawyer who handled everything. After what happened, I think staying alone and not getting married is the best option. I cannot trust any person, let alone another girl. It will be too much if I have to go through this again, I might not survive the second time. However, I cannot forget how our master protected me and stopping me from harming myself. I am now much better than before and am happy, having regained the weight that I lost while in India (more than 5kg) and stopped taking anxiety tablet doctor prescribed me. People say foreigners get married in India and leave the girls, what about people like us??? Please post this on other forums so any brother/ sister going to India to get married knows of the dangers.
  7. hi all I am a Canadian keshdhari (not amritdhari) Sikh guy who didn't really understand Sikhi on a deeper level prior to recently. I kept the look but didn't know much. This summer I made a point to learn as much as I could and I have been feeling guilty since. Last year I dated a girl (not Sikh) and while it wasn't based around lust (she was a great person, humanitarian) I feel terrible about things that happened. We did not have sex, but we were intimate and very close with each other physically. I no longer associate with this girl in this manner, and just have an occasional short platonic conversation. I've come to the point in my life where I regret this now. I want to find a Sikh partner for my life, but I feel I will be looked down at due to this area of my life. I feel that when girls find out I had a relationship in the past they will throw me to the side and I don't want to lie to them or hide it. At the same time I would prefer to end up with someone who hasn't had sexual relations in the past.... but I don't know if I can even expect that now All in all I feel bad, but have learned from my experience. I will not date anyone until marriage. I just fear for how I should handle situations with Sikh women I meet in the future. Any thoughts from older/wiser individuals appreciated thank you
  8. Hi I am hoping that you can give me some advice on this topic. I've developed feelings for a guy I've known my whole life, he feels the same way. We want to get married but the only problem is that his Dad and my Dad are from the same village back in India. How much of a problem will this be and why? I don't fully understand the issue as we live in the UK and we don't have the same surname. We've been friends for years and this is a much deeper emotional connection (not based on lust - as that's where we agreed to draw the line). We have tried to forget each other several times but this hasn't worked as we just end up back together. We want to take things further and get our families involved but I'd like to know what I'm going to let myself in for before I do so. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
  9. Hello everyone, I am a young Sikh man. I've kept my dhari and kesh my whole life. I'm a sensitive, mentally weak person in general, and its's been very difficult for me to deal with the additional issues that come along with being a Singh. I don't have much experience with girls. I know the gurmukh approach is to accept an arranged marriage. Unfortunately, I am not on that level spiritually. All my life I have just wanted to experience a girl's affection and feel liked and wanted. Being a Singh has made it extremely difficult for me to find girls who are even open to getting to know me in the context of a relationship. It's been very difficult for me to deal with my inability to get anywhere with women, and I've been quite depressed about this. The depression has taken a major toll on me. It's affected my productivity at work, and I've lost my job. I don't know what to do. I can't even consider cutting my hair. I'd never be able to live with myself. But I just hate being alive in this world and feeling like a failure who can't get anywhere. I hate living and hate this world.
  10. Hey guys, The answer to this is probably the obvious one but I guess I just need validation, for myself more than anything. I'm Muslim, I met this Sikh guy in University, he pursued me and we started dating. I didn't see his religion, creed, background or anything, I just saw his heart and I eventually fell in love with him. He told me he loved me too and mentioned marriage and kids several times too. I was over at his house often. His parents knew about us and they seemed okay with it. After about a year of dating I felt that we should make things a bit more official and I asked him when we would get married. He kept delaying it. First it was wait until I graduate, then wait until I get a job. I waited. After he got a job I was like okay now lets get married but he kept avoiding giving me an answer. He did talk about marriage, but whenever I pinned him down for a clear answer he never gave it. By now I was feeling uneasy and stressed. My parents wanted me to get an arranged marriage and it was becoming more and more stressful hiding everything from everyone. The only time I would reveal everything to my parents is if he agreed to marriage. I then decided to give him an ultimatum. We had broken up over the marriage issue several times before, but now I told him it was for real. I asked him to decide and he chose to break up. I was devastated. I asked him why, he said his parents would never agree. I was so confused as his parents knew about us all along and they seemed to be good people. I was at his house all the time and I spent nights there too. I knew his sisters and hung out with his family too. I loved him like a husband. I took care of him, cooked for him and took care of all his needs. I was even willing to convert to Sikhism for him. It turns out that his parents were okay with him and me dating but they would never let him marry me. They knew we were sleeping together and his dad told him to have fun, but make sure he doesn't get me pregnant. I have a lot of Sikh friends and I love them to pieces. They are all such good people that's why I am so shocked at what this guy and his family did to me. What does your religion say about something like this? Is there any punishment for someone who does something like this to someone? Is it okay to do something like this to someone who is not Sikh?
  11. Alcoholic Boyfriend

    So my boyfriend and I have been together nine months, hes been in rehab twice and we have had so many arguments during these times. When do I say enough is enough? I moved in with him about a month ago and trying to help him get his life together so we can start our lives together, but I really cant trust or believe he is being honest with me. God is suppose to be the center of our lives but he is forever going against what he says he wants....I'm tired of trying and letting my personal strength and needs get pushed to the side all the time.....
×