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Found 16 results

  1. Check this *edit* out..... http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5263981/Student-Birmingham-bought-car-bomb-kill-parents.html
  2. Moving Out

    WJKK WJKF I recently got married, around 10 months ago, and my wife moved in with myself and my family. My family are religious to an extent but dad and bro are pagg wale with cut beards. The first few months of marriage were okay, from around April we have seen a lot of issues, such as : 1. "your wife doesn't do anything" ie when the mrs cooks and it isn't to my parents approval they won't eat it. 2. If we go out during the weekend / for dinner or social - we get told we are being disrespectful and that we have too much money for our own good. 3. I've just decided to grow out my Dari and have it prakash- that's also been ridiculed. Don't get me wrong every family has issues and every marriage has teething problems. We've had our ups and downs but the other week we got told quite viciously to leave the house as we were not wanted. So I adhered for myself and my wife a rented apartment etc. My question I guess is how would you have dealt with it ? It just feels as if the world and its dog is after us at the moment. any suggestions / help is appreciated thanks WJKK WJKF
  3. Wjkk wjkf, i am 12 yrs old and I want to take Amrit but my parents won't let me. 1. They say u r too young. 2. You might cut your hair when u grow up. 3. People don't hire amritdharis. 4. When will u get if u take Amrit. 5. You don't need to take Amrit to be a true Sikh. (I know this but I said u r not a complete Sikh) 6. God doesn't give anything to amritdharis These r some of the issues I am facing please help very depressed
  4. Sikh parent divorce

    Hey guys. Today things escalated really quickly. My mom & dad really can't get along. There's always a problem between them, sometimes money, sometimes trust. My mom called the police & they came home and sorted everything out. Either my mom or dad will file a divorce which is fine with me as i want everyone to be happy, & divorce is the best solution now. I have no harsh feeling towards Baba ji, instead i pray & go to Guruduwara as normal. This happened yesterday. If you guys can guide or advice me through this, i will be grateful. Thanks & WJKK WJKF
  5. I also posted this same topic on Sikhnet forum as well waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh Hi guys I am 15 years old and a half and for the past year and a half I have been living with my best friend’s family since my mother (who has severe Bipolar and Borderline Personality Disorder lives on a disability pension) kicked me out. My friend’s family are Sikh and I live with them and my friend’s extended family in a large house in Central Surrey, B.C. in a Sikh neighborhood. They have been very generous with me, they paid for my food, clothes among other things, plus they are teaching me how to drive. Everyone in the house, my friend, his two sisters, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins are all strict Amritdhari Sikhs and I do my best to try and respect their culture. They never have asked much of me other than to do well in school (I usually get a mixture of A’s and B’s), like my friend, I rarely ever do chores around the house as his sisters and female cousins (and other female relatives) who also live in the house do the dishes and various chores. However, last week during a family discussion, I was asked if I would like to officially be adopted by my friend’s parents as they and the rest of the extended family saw me as a son. They told me to think about it for a while since if I choose to let them adopt me, I would have to become a Sikh not to mention learn how to speak Punjabi. My friend is baptised and wears a patiala shahi turban but I always wondered what it is like to be a turbaned Sikh. They told me if I allow them to adopt me and agree to become a Sikh, I can stay with them as long as I want. They even told me I would be getting an arranged marriage to a Punjabi Sikh girl after I finish university and start a career. They gave me a month to think it over and if I agree to become a Sikh, they would be willing to get a lawyer to have my estranged mother’s parental rights terminated. I am at a crossroads here, I have fallen in love with them and I am very grateful for what they have done for me but I am not sure if I really want to become a Sikh, any advice?
  6. wjkk, wjkf. my best friend's parents beat her constantly and this has been going on for a while. she is amritdhari but committed a mistake last year and they have been beating her constantly after wards for no reason after it. Even though she has accepted her mistake and become better. Now, she is continually depressed always and suicidal. but they do not care at all. I have had to pull her through so much. They physically and verbally abuse her again and again. She has recently found out she is at risk for cancer and her parents still do not care even though she goes through so much pain. her older and younger brothers verbally abuse her as well. I have no idea what to do. It hurts not knowing what to do. CAN SOMEONE PLEASE HELP? This has been going on for too long. and I can't take it seeing her pain. I love her. She's the sister i never had. This is a urgent benti to sangat. Please. wjkk, wjkf
  7. I'd like to start of by saying I AM NOT YET AMRITDHARI. But I was aiming to take Amrit at my closest Amrit Sanchar in Malton, Ontario Canada Gurdwara in 2016. I would have loved to have taken Amrit at the Amrit Sanchar before this one,this year, but I waned to get in control of my Kaam Problem first. Sadly, instead of controlling it, it is only getting worse day by day. I'm losing control of the problem, and to top it off, I've stopped doing Bani and Jaap. I live in a whitetown far away from Malton so getting Sangat is quite difficult. My parents like Sikhi, but think that Sangat is pointless, and a waste of time, and that I should focus on my studies. Whenever I do get Sangat, I feel like I'm getting some strength, but it is very temporary, and after a few days I go back to my s***** self. Please give me any tips you can and thank you Khalsey Jeeo!
  8. WJKK WJKF, I would like to ask the sangat a few questions about practices my parents try to enforce upon me and my siblings and encourage us to follow them as much as possible and I would like to see where the sangat stands on these issues. I've listed them below: 1. My father in particular says that we must not eat from others as when we do, they take away at least 25 Sukhmani Sahib worth of our pun from all the paath that we do. And that people at our local gurudwara sometimes come with degh which gets mixed into the degh, the gurudwara singhs make and that to take as little as possible. He says that we must take degh but these people will take away all the effort we put into pursuing a true sikhi jeevan by taking away the fal of the paat. But then he always encourages us to do as much sewa as possible and has me deliver food to the gurudwara for "fal". Isn't this being hypocritical and others would be eating from that as well? I don't understand this. He also says that at the nagar kirtans to avoid eating from anyone and same for any dharmic parades we hold. I find this nonsense personally but I'd like to hear your point of view. I feel we should never have to worry about such a thing when going to the Gurudwara or while being in the Guru's presence and being in bliss from all the kirtan and sangat around us. Isn't that what vand ke shako means..to share with all and to rejoice in the Lords name in sangat ? Then why do we have to worry about such petty things like watching who we eat from if we trust them and this bank system of maintaining all the path that we do. It reminds me of calorie counting. Sure it's great for reaching the goal you may have in mind but it can drive you crazy. This goes so far as when we even visit a family friend's house, he repeatedly says no to eating anything but when anyone visits ours, its him trying to convince them to have as much as possible and that it's their house too. 2. Washing your hair at night, combing your hair at night, purchasing iron or steel on saturdays, cutting your nails at night, vacuuming and using a broom to clean in the evening times - I find this all nonsense that might have carried over from Hinduism at some point but my parents tell me "Sikhi vich siraf mannan di jaga hai" which i don't agree with at all. I feel i should be able to question everything and not blindly follow and the Guru will provide me with the answers as He seems fit. But they get very very defensive over all this and I feel its corrupting their perspective on what sikhi truly is. Nails are dead cells..they should be able to be cut at any time of day. As for washing the hair, in Sikhi, is all hair not equal? What difference is there between the hair on our head and the hair on our arms and legs? Should we not wash those as well at night then? I don't understand the logic here. Additionally, regarding the broom, my dad always says a Mahapurash he follows in his pind once warned a woman not to use a jharoo at night and thats why he follows it. Maybe the Mahapursh had another meaning in mind? Perhaps it was just for that particular situation? They do usually say things in indirect manners at times so perhaps thats the case here but das doesn't know. 3. Sikhi states all people are equal. Everyone was made from the same light(Aval Allah Noor Upada Kudrat Ke Sab Bande). We have Bhagat Kabir and Bhagat Farid Ji's bani as proof, the Golden temple's foundation being laid by a Muslim, and the langar system and much much more. However, my parents always act like Sikhi is superior in every way. I don't see it like this. I have friends from all religions and i truly from the bottom of my heart feel that every religion has the same potential to find God and they're just separate paths but if I didn't know any better, my parents would have me believing Hindus aren't good people for the 1984 bombing and Muslims for the Mughal rule and all. At times they say, alright not everyone is bad, but then they'll say don't wear green to the Gurudwara because it's on the Pakistani flag. I'm also forbidden from eating at the homes of any of my muslim friends even if the food is completely vegetarian. There's so much more I could go on about but I'd have essays here. I don't mean to belittle or slander my parents in any way. I respect them and love them but I'm just tired of hearing lectures on these issues on a day to day basis where I'm beginning to get aggravated and they're not the type to listen either. My father has a habit of repeatedly lecturing you on the same topic over and over whenever he sees me and will call to check up on me whenever I go out anywhere on where I've eaten and such. He also has the typical punjabi anger issues and follows a rule of " Either listen to what I have to say or leave the house forever" so there's no room to really argue over anything and I end up pretty quiet and just listening while arguing within the confines of my head. I can't really pretend to practice these things for their sake without it affecting my own spirituality. What are your takes on this? I apologize if I have said or mentioned anything that may have offended anyone. Thank You.
  9. Hello all, first time I've ever posted anything but am a long time lurker. I was just wondering if my brothers and sisters here can help me out/give me some advice. I am a first year in university in the UK, I have met a girl who is 1st year in Uni also but in Australia. I am a Sikh from a Sikh Indian Punjabi household and she is agnostic and White. Now my question is what shall I do? I do not know what to tell anyone. I am a very private person and whilst my parents are not overly conservative I know what is "expected of me" ie nice Indian/Sikh/Punjabi kori and such. But honestly I do love this girl and she loves me, this is not some sort of immature/childish fantasy, I know what love is and regardless of anything else I do feel like we are soul mates. I am not interested in the sexual aspect of this relationship- that is immaterial to me, I love her as a person- that she is attractive is rather irrelevant to me. Now Sikhi teaches that once two souls are married they become one, that there is no Sikh/Hindu/Muslim/other that we are all on different paths to the same ultimate goal and as such her religion and mine is immaterial, isn't it? one should respect one's parents and I feel like I am being dishonest and disloyal by keeping such things from them. I am very conflicted, I would very much like to tell them but then I am also aware this could be received less than desirably and there is nothing I wouldn't do for this girl. Am I being a bad son? Am I being a bad Sikh? I would never even think about it but do I ask her to convert (this is strictly against my personal beliefs and against Sikhi, right?)
  10. No Sangat

    got good sangat at gurdwara, knew them for over 10 years but parents suddenly stopped us going reason is known.. it is my behavior, apparently its bad, but i dont think so, i helpat home,,, dont talk back etc... and my school friends at school are all muslim, no sangat at the moment haven't been gurdwara in 2 months still reading as much bani as possible teen need my sangat back, but how?
  11. WJKK WJKF I'm a grade 11 student and I've always done good in school, my marks are usually in the 90's. But the problem is that this year I've been completely stressed out with things outside of school and my marks have dropped a lot. Some marks are even in the high 70's. Report cards are coming soon and I don't know what I'm supposed to do now. I have no one to help me in this situation and my parents are really strict and I know I'm in huge trouble right now. It is my fault, I put myself through too than I could handle. Also, school's only been going on for two months and we've only had about 1-2 tests in each subject, I still have 8 months to pull everything up but my parents aren't going to take that excuse. Is there anything I can do to avoid the excessive amounts of shittar that I'm going to get soon? Any advise would be greatly appreciated. Thank you. WJKK WJKF
  12. Problem With Parents

    WJKK WJKF I'm 15 years old, I've grown up in a non-amritdhari family and my dad cuts his hair. I've kept my kesh my entire life and so has my younger brother. I've been doing kirtan and path for most of my life, my dad has no problems with that. But I wear a dhamalla/gol pagh and my parents don't like that. I don't want to wear the other type of "regular" pagh that he wants me to wear ...my dad tells me dhamlla's make people look uneducated. He also makes me use fixo for my beard, while I want to keep it open. Another problem that I'm facing is my masee (aunt)... wants me to trim my beard! And I've told her I don't want to and never will, but she keeps on annoying me about it. What can I do to get my aunt and my dad to just let me do what I want? Any help would be great. Thanks. WJKK WJKF
  13. WJKK WJKF, I am 23 years old and I live with my parents and I have great desire to take amrit. I have wanted to take amrit for the last 5 years. My mom does not approve of me keeping my hair as she has a very western lifestyle. I know I could easily move out as I am no longer a minor, but I would like to stay ultimately with my parents as I also believe strongly in family, as guru ji's also taught. Is there any tips on how I can convince my parents for myself take amrit and keep my hair? Is there some bani I should read to gain courage and do ardaas to gain their acceptance? I don't know what it is with this western world :stupidme: that won't let their children in sikhi, but rather having them live the typical "youngster" lifestyle. Also, does anyone have times on what it is like to grow your hair and first time go out with a dastar, like to work/school... iam very nervous of the empty stares! :omg: Some help from my fellow bro's and sisters would be very helpful! Guru Ang Sang
  14. Today my parents accidentally gave me halal biscuits to eat and I am amritdhari I trusted them and well.... so what do I do now am I a non-Sikh now??/
  15. SSA Sangat ji... I am still going to school making my A levels.... In the last. Recently I have many toughts about my future.. I dont really know what I want to be!! I mean I have no real interests... I just play some games on computer, and search trough Sikhi (Sikh videoes, kathas all stuff about Sikhi)after I come home from school... then I watch some youtube videos.. and the day is over.. On weeknds I go jobbing... Almost every day is the same! My grades are average/good .. I don´t study at all .. I just pay attention to the lessen.. and get my grades.. I am the kind of person who never learns or very rarely learns for tests and stuff.. And if I have to hand out homeowkr I alway do it on the deadline! For example I have to hand out an presentation at the 20.th december, I will start on the 19.th at 9 pm and will finish it at 1 -2 am .... I dont know why?!?! I try everything to do my work earlier but nothing helps... I always end up doing my work a day before deadline ! What is wrong with me?? I just browse youtube and read stuff related to Sikhi , Sikhi is my only REAL interesting... Why is this so?? I sometimes think to stop my a levels and just search for a job ... But I fear my parents.. they want me to become a docotr or stuff... They would never accept a bad occucipation for me... but I just want to work.. I am done with school and stuff this is just annoying for me... I mean my parents would be very sad if I would become a secreterial or something like that.. I just dont know... everything is fckd up please help me...... and give solutions...
  16. Parents Saying No

    Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh Sangat Ji, I am posting in the Gupt section because I have a very big concern I need help with. Before I divulge into the details of my problem, let me introduce you to myself and my background. I live in Canada, I am a university student, and am kesdhari. I'm in my early 20's and believe to have a good head on my shoulders. I come from a religious family who are amritdhari (I am not at the moment). Alright, now onto my query. For quite some time, my parents have been asking me to find myself a girl for marriage. At first, I never gave it much thought; many of the girls I know and am friends with are already seeing people, if not, they have been in prior relationships and have a "history" if you know what I mean (as far as rumours go - that in itself is another thing). Anyways, about a few months ago, I met this girl online. She's from a White, Catholic family. However, she gave up Catholicism and converted to Sikhism (has not taken amrit, but has adopted the Sikh way of life as much as she can). Her and I have been talking for quite some time now and decided to move our relationship from friendship to dating (I know many of you here may oppose this, however, I am fine with this notion so if you have any comments regarding your opposition to dating, please refrain from doing so). We have not done anything inappropriate at all (no kissing, inappropriate touching, etc). Even before we were dating, I found myself liking her, however, held back since I did not want any negative emotions to overcome me. Therefore, I took a hukamnama from Guru Granth Sahib Ji. In my ardas, I asked Guru Ji to let me know if it was okay to move the friendship further, however (and obviously) to refrain from any negative emotions that may come between her and I. So, ideally, to be in a relationship, however, not doing anything that would make her and I deviate away from Sikhi. The Hukam I received was "Santha Ke Karaj Aap Khaloya, Har Kamm Karavan Aaya Raam" - which comes in Raag Suhi, ang 783. Having read the hukamnama, I believed Guru ji to be informing me that her and I meeting was destined to occur (also, do note I do not consider myself a Sant by any means, however, this was my interpretation of the hukamnama). Now, when my parents ask me if I found someone, I've suggested the idea of marrying someone non-Punjabi (i.e have said White person). My parents flipped out, and my dad went on a huge swearing fit saying he'll never let it happen, and if it does, he'll kick me out of the house and disown me. On top of that, my parents have been really rude as of late, with my dad still swearing at me. I do not know what to do. I have taken 2 more hukamnama's asking for Guru Ji's help, both times Guru ji has said to meditate on Waheguru for my desires to be fulfilled. I do not know what to do. I trust in Guru Ji and believe everything will be fine. However, I do not want to leave my family, or get kicked out, for something that isn't that big of a deal (in my opinion). She's a devoted Sikh, and wants to take amrit in the near future. Sangat ji, I guess what I'm asking is, can you please give me some advice, and also do ardas for me, so that everything goes well and that her, my family, and I can live under one roof happily? I apologize for the long post and for taking your time (though, I appreciate you reading this). Thank you!
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