• advertisement_alt
  • advertisement_alt
  • advertisement_alt

Search the Community

Showing results for tags 'anand karaj'.

More search options

  • Search By Tags

    Type tags separated by commas.
  • Search By Author

Content Type


    • Agree to Disagree

Found 21 results

  1. Just trying to raise awareness about our service within the Sikh community. Turban Rishta is a bespoke matchmaking service for UK Sikh turban professionals. We have over 30 years of experience of doing this locally and have launched our website. We have personal reasons for why we wish to do this for free and would like to reach out to as many people as possible. Please visit/share and sign up to attend our events - www.turbanrishta.com
  2. Fateh ji, Can any Gursikh couple share their wedding video or give me tips on how it should be done? Ie. To have mayian or not, mehndi or not, reception or not? I am unclear of the maryada surrounding that. The Sikh Rehit Maryada helps but I would like to see the full wedding in action. The YouTube videos just an overview. Thanks
  3. In one of the 52 commandments Guru Gobind Singh Ji left for the Sikhs he stated that a daughter of the Sikhs should only have her hand in marriage given to another Sikh family. But he did not say the same for Sikh sons for them only given to Sikhs for marriage. Why was this? This question is mainly for the liberal lefties to ponder on. Because to majority of learned and right thinking Sikhs he is clearly showing us how there is a difference between the genders when it comes to procreation and relationships. Sikh Men are like rocks in the ground they will usually stick to their reiligion. And Guru Ji knows the condition of men of all backgrounds are that they are tribal so its a given that sons will not let the Sikh side down. But most women are like sheep they will be lead to whatever religion their partner is a believer in. So if they are married off to non-sikhs then she will become that non-sikh and her offsping 9/10 times will be non-sikhs. For a pularistic faith like Sikhi it is especially dangerous for our demographics sake that Sikh women are raised in the belief that they only want to marry a fellow Sikh believer. We can see countless examples of non-abrahmic faith communities whose populations have been destroyed because they did not control their womens choice of partner. We can look at the kalaesh of northern pakistan who are almost extinct due to muslims converting their women and creating more muslims. We can see zoroesterian persians who had a huge mighty empire that used to invade other lands but now are no where to be found only small communities scattered around the world because muslims forced islam on them and bred with their women creating muslims only. Which is why we know muslims try their best to groom and convert kafir non-muslim women especially those who they view they are in war in to get 1 over the kufr. And if you ever seen a marriage between a girl from Sikh background to a non-sikh groom you will find most of the time the kids are born as non-sikhs. So there is no equality in nature & biology nor in Sikhi nor in most human soceities that want to exist and excel when it comes to relationships there are clear set out rules.
  4. Why does no one raise this issue? Are parents really happy that their kids do this? Why dont they stop them? What happened to arrange marriages?
  5. white privilage anti-sikh news content copywriters and editors working at sky news rear their ugly racist again by reporting about the icident at lemington gurdwara as an 30 armed sword weidling gang stroming their own gurdwara to prevent a MIXED-RACE marriage. These racist white right wing main stream media anti-sikh morons deliberate write in their news articles about mixed-race when the fact of the matter is the protestors are against MIXED-FAITH marriage which is not allowed in the Sikh religion. Mix-race is absolutely fine aslong both partners are Sikhs. http://news.sky.com/story/sword-wielding-gang-storm-sikh-temple-in-leamington-spa-10574252
  6. Gur Fateh Ji, Could some high avasthi gursikh please explain the reason Sikh Rehat Maryada requires the Singh and Singhni to stand during the reciting of lava by the Granthi Singh Ji? Perhaps more importantly, why is this not strictly enforced by Gurdwara Sahibs in Punjab? Punjabi Sikhs tend to blame Western Sikhs for issues such as the marriage of Sikhs with non-Sikhs but when I brought this issue forward with a Gursikh in Punjab he said it was not required to stand during the recitation of lava and claimed that I was looking at either an altered copy of the Rehat Maryada or it has been "mistranslated" into English. Note that section IV, Article XVIII clearly states the following: After the conclusion of the recitation of each of the stanzas, the boy, followed by the girl holding the end of the sash, should go round the Guru Granth Sahib while the ragis or the congregation sing out the recited stanza. The boy and girl, after every circumambulation, should bow before the Guru Granth Sahib in genuflexion, lowering their forehead to touch the ground and then stand up to listen to the recitation of the next stanza. (Source: http://sgpc.net/sikh-rehat-maryada-in-english/) Gur Fateh Ji.
  7. http://www.sikhnet.com/news/mixed-marriages-our-gurduaras When reading this article written by I.J. Singh and Guruka Singh, i was not sure if it was about who can enter the Gurdwara and what the Catholics have done around marriage issues in the past or mixed marriages being allowed in the Gurdwara. The title of the article is “Mix Marraiges in our Gurdwaras”, but only a very small portion of the article gives a patronizing view of those who view mixed marriages in Gurdwaras as wrong. Instead they are shaming and pointing the finger to allow others into the Gurdwara. I believe they should have decided on titling this article, “Two Senior Citizens Rambling”. When they finally start to talk about the issue the reasons for barring mixed marriages at the Gurdwara are being mocked by the two writers; I.J. Singh and Guruka Singh. The actual reasons why the Guru, Sri Akal Takht Sahib, Sikhs, and Sikh groups are barring mixed marriages in the Gurdwara are not even mentioned in the article. However let’s address the rambling they committed to in the article about allowing others into the Gurdwara. They mention Sri Harmandir Sahib has four doors, which signifies all people regardless of background are allowed into the Gurdwara. I fully agree with these two here. Yet they forget to mention, maybe unintentionally, regardless which door you come into the Gurdwara, you will only hear the teachings of one Guru; Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji. Whether you enter from the south or east or west or north all four doors lead to the one teacher. This one teacher is giving all people who enter the same teaching regardless of which faith they profess to be part of or what views they hold as agnostics or atheist. The teachings of Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji don’t change from any direction, time or person. They continue to ramble and bring up the point, Sikhs can’t define who is a Sikh, but the Guru does. True enough and we have history dictating how a person was defined as a Sikh and Gurbani very clearly describes who is a Sikh. Sri Akal Takht Sahib has also done a great job of taking the teachings from Gurbani and defining who is a Sikh. Yet according to these two, we should ignore all this and on the basis of Sri Harmandir Sahib having four doors, allow anyone to have an anand Karaj!!! They also go to the extent of saying we, Sikhs, don’t know who is a Sikh and they give an example of a Sikh woman marrying an agnostic. I don’t know if old age as taken the toll on both of them, but yeah we do know who is a Sikh. Their example says the man marrying the Sikh woman was an agnostic, which means he was not a Sikh and an agnostic. The simple question of whether the couple are both Sikh is asked before an Anand Karaj is done? What a simple solution to finding out who is a Sikh and defining if it is a mixed marriage. And if one of the two is not a Sikh, then they can’t have an Anand Karaj. Now let’s get down to the patronizing reasons they gave for not allowing mixed marriages in the Gurdwara. Reason #1: Perhaps they come from a fear of dilution of the faith Sorry but reason 1 doesn’t apply to Sikhi for barring mixed marriages in the Gurdwara. Reason #2: or possibly to create an insular barrier to “outsiders Nope, again wrong religion. This is Sikhi not Catholic or Islam. Reason #3: Or perhaps they are rooted in an attempt to ensure a successful marriage? Nope, doesn’t apply to Sikhi and Sikhs, who are barring mixed marriages from taking place at the Gurdwara. I.J. Singh in the past was known to using his secular credentials as a doctor in Chemistry (I believe it was Chemistry) as his credential to be a doctor of Sikhi. Every article he wrote his views on Sikhi were started off by Dr. I.J. Singh. If you don’t believe me, do a simple search online and this deception will come aware to you. I mention this here because, I see Dr. I.J. Singh has made some progress in not writing Dr. in front of his name today, when he writes his views on Sikhi. So I applaud him for not deceiving others with the title of Dr. I.J. Singh anymore. Although it took some time to get him to change from his deception. It is a step forward in the right direction. Coming to the Gurdwara is no sign of any person accepting Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji as their Guru. Sikh history tells us even spy’s have come to the open Gurdwara of the Gurus and still do to this date. So this level of participation at the Gurdwara can’t be assigned as to allow the Anand Karaj for the person. The level of commitment for Anand Karaj is higher than simply coming to the Gurdwara. Gurbani read in the Anand Karaj defines the level of commitment and guides the couple on how to behave after they are married. The first level of commitment is to accept Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji as your Guru. Which also implies a person cannot accept anyone else as their Guru or religious/spiritual guide in life. For instance a person who claims to be Christian or agnostic has chosen not to accept Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji as their religious/spiritual guide. The Christian has accepted Jesus (the Bible) and the latter has accepted no one. In both cases they have not accepted the level of commitment to be Sikhs. Therefore, both are disqualified from having an Anand Karaj. If I.J. Singh and Guruka Singh were more honest in their article there could have been progress in this debate and more people would be able to see what it means to be a Sikh. Many could have benefited from this discussion and their article, if they were honest and didn’t ramble about other unrelated topics. I guess positive change comes hard for I.J. Singh and Guruka Singh. Let’s hope in the future they are honest with their approach.
  8. If the gurdwaras in the UK can get together to adopt a resolution about anand karaj and stop the beadbi of the anand karaj why are Canadian and USA Gurdwara committees lagging behind. We need to get our Gurdwara committees to take a stand and follow the Hukamnama of Akal Thakat. Please see video below. https://www.facebook.com/1548308148780353/videos/1639645269646640/
  9. Please, please, please watch this entire video. Not because you don't know the who, what and why of the Anand Karaj, but because of the way Bhai Jagraj Singh addresses the issue in a very diplomatic and eloquent manner. Take note because chances are the punjabis who are spewing hatred on the internet won't watch this, but you can watch it and become a beacon of information instead which can be much more effective. I feel like this video in its entirety should be the standard for how to address this issue. If I'm not mistaken, not a single point was left out in this educational video. If Sikh community in UK can get on the same page, then the hippy fake liberals who will be apologists for muslims/islam will just be letting out hot air with nothing of substance.
  10. Can an amritdhari girl wed a non amritdhari guy in anand karaj? The guys kesdhari, just hasnt decided to take amrit yet, wants to progress with rehat before committing to amrit. Both the girl and guy and their families are happy with it. Any potential issues?
  11. When Ram Rai, the eldest son of Mata Krishen Kaur and Guru Har Rai Ji, changed a word of a Gurbani tukh to appease (the usurper of the Mughal Raj) Arungzeb, Guru Har Rai Ji excommunicated him from Sikhi. Baba Ram Rai was Guru Sahib’s own son yet he had disrespected Gurbani which is considered the highest form of direspect in the Sikh Faith. Baani Guru, Guru Hai Baani. BUT we forget one important thing, Baba Ram Rai was punished so severely because he KNOWINGLY did the wrong thing. Being Guru Sahib’s son he was well aware of the crime he was committing and therefore it was a choice. Sadly majority of our community today is ignorant of our faith and it’s history. So how then can we hold individuals responsible when they disrespect Gurbani and thereby the True Guru unknowingly? Our response must be different because the Guru is just and never angry toward those who commit a mistake unknowingly. It is counterproductive to curse the bride and say “she deserves to rot in hell” or that “she is a stupid <banned word filter activated> who should die”. This only perpetuates ignorance and division within our community. We must as a community take responsibility and educate ourselves and others to make sure incidents like this never occur again. As for incidents regarding to Anand Karaj, Anand Karaj is a very big commitment that we have dumbed down to “the Punjabi Marriage Ceremony” and by doing so we have turned it into a ritual, something often the bride and groom do without true knowledge. The Anand Karaj is a commitment ceremony that binds the souls of the couple, you are not only committing to each other but making the HUGE commitment of accepting Guru Sahib as your Guru, to follow “his” teachings and keep “him” in the center of your new married life. Each part of the Lavaan gives you a different teaching which you hear out while you revolve around the Guru like the earth revolves around the sun and you commit to that teaching, saying you fully agree with it and will embody it the moment you bow your head before the Guru and Matha Tek. The “pheray” or parkarma around Guru Granth Sahib was not always part of the ceremony, it was added and is merely mirroring your commitment. The palla shows the connecting of two souls, you walk around Guru Sahib to show “he” is the center of your life. The reason walking side by side doesn’t work is because you both will not be equidistance from Guru Sahib, one person will be further. The woman walking behind the man is not inequality because it simply mirrors a Gurbani tukh. Also in the greater context of Anand Karaj one can see inequality is not an issue. As I stated before, we are viewing our religion through a western perspective without the knowledge and historical context of our religion. Furthermore, another way to look at in a western perspective is “Behind every man is a strong woman…and boom now it’s liberating. I would like to state once again that ignorance is the root of all the confusion and division in our community. If it pains you to see Guru Granth Sahib disrespected then take it upon yourself to educate others of Gurbani and Sikh History. Do your research so you can know about the faith and institution you claim to be a part of. I would like to end this by saying once again, disrespect to Gurbani and thereby the true Guru is the highest crime. I will leave you with one other example of how much respect our Gurus had for Gurbani. They were always stating that they are nothing, Gurbani, the word of Waheguru is everything, worship and follow Gurbani not their physical forms. Baani Guru, Guru Hai Baani. When Guru Arjun Dev Ji, the 5th Guru was bringing Aad Granth (half of Guru Granth Sahib organized into a saroop) to Amritsar, Baba Buddha ji carried Aad Granth on his head while Guru Arjun Dev Ji did chaur seva (waving of peacock feathers). This shocked the sangat that was walking alongside Guru Sahib because chaur seva was something that was only done to the Guru or to Kings and yet here was the Guru doing chaur seva to what appeared to be a book! Then when they ended the daily events at Amritsar, the Sikhs asked Guru Arjun Dev Ji where they should put Aad Granth for the night. Guru Sahib responded, Aad Granth will rest on my bed, I will sleep on the floor beside it. OUR GURUS SHOWED TIME AND TIME AGAIN THAT GURBANI IS THE HIGHEST. Today we have largely forgotten this and disregard Guru Granth Sahib, we neglect our Guru by remaining ignorant of “his” teachings. Source: http://singhstation.net/2014/12/anand-karaj-in-the-context-of-guru-and-western-culture/
  12. http://www.kaurlife.org/tag/baljit-bally-kaur-lehal/ Couple challenge anand karaj maryada. Take lavan side by side. Question equality in sikhi. W T F?
  13. Maryada and Concept of marriage Ceremony and Spiritual Meaning Discussion Points
  14. In the last two or three days there has been a gross mistranslation being forced on people on the following lines. ਨਿਜ ਨਾਰੀ ਕੇ ਸਾਥ ਨੇਹੁ ਤੁਮ ਨਿਤ ਬਢੈਯਹੁ ॥ ਪਰ ਨਾਰੀ ਕੀ ਸੇਜ ਭੂਲਿ ਸੁਪਨੇ ਹੂੰ ਨ ਜੈਯਹੁ ॥ These lines are directly from Sri Charitropakhyan in the Tale of Roop Kaur. You can find the whole Tale here: http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?/topic/55675-charitropakhyan-tale-of-roop-kaur-by-sirdar-kapur-singh/ Sardar Kapur Singh has translated the above lines in the following way. keep developing love with your own wife, but never even dream of going to someone’s else bed. The translation done by Sardar Kapur Singh is much more accurate than those who translate ਸਾਥ as bedroom fun with the wife. The word "love" does not come in the above two lines in Gurmukhi and surely not intercourse. The word ਸਾਥ literally means relationship. These words of wisdom (Gurbani) are coming from none other than Sri Guru Teg Bahadur Sahib ji. Reading Guru Sahib's Bani one get's the understanding that even the wife calls the husband a ghost at death. dyvgMDwrI mhlw 9 ] dhaevaga(n)dhhaaree mehalaa 9 || Raag Dayv-Gandhaaree, Ninth Mehla: sB ikCu jIvq ko ibvhwr ] sabh kishh jeevath ko bivehaar || All things are mere diversions of life: mwq ipqw BweI suq bMDp Aru Puin igRh kI nwir ]1] rhwau ] maath pithaa bhaaee suth ba(n)dhhap ar fun grih kee naar ||1|| rehaao || mother, father, siblings, children, relatives and the wife of your home. ||1||Pause|| qn qy pRwn hoq jb inAwry tyrq pRyiq pukwir ] than thae praan hoth jab niaarae ttaerath praeth pukaar || When the soul is separated from the body, then they will cry out, calling you a ghost. AwD GrI koaU nih rwKY Gr qy dyq inkwir ]1] aadhh gharee kooo nehi raakhai ghar thae dhaeth nikaar ||1|| No one will let you stay, for even half an hour; they drive you out of the house. ||1|| imRg iqRsnw ijau jg rcnw Xh dyKhu irdY ibcwir ] mrig thrisanaa jio jag rachanaa yeh dhaekhahu ridhai bichaar || The created world is like an illusion, a mirage - see this, and reflect upon it in your mind. khu nwnk Bju rwm nwm inq jw qy hoq auDwr ]2]2] kahu naanak bhaj raam naam nith jaa thae hoth oudhhaar ||2||2|| Says Nanak, vibrate forever the Name of the Lord, which shall deliver you. ||2||2|| She wants to forget her husband from her mind because his remembrance only brings grief. Others also want to forget you because of the grief your remembrance brings. The longer the wife holds on to his remembrance the more feelings of loss and depression she struggles with. Relatives and friends tell her to let go of him and move on. What does this "move on" mean. It's exactly what Guru Sahib says. It's an illusion, one day you are here laughing and playing and next day you are gone like you never existed. Surely a relationship based on love (body, possessions, happiness the husband brought, his personality, worldly characteristics and acts) does not pass the test. What kind of ਸਾਥ (relationship) does Guru Sahib want Sikhs to build with a wife? The root and last breath of this relationship is described in the Lavan paath read at the wedding. Here is a link to the Lavan. http://sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2897 You are to forget about all the previous attachments and wild instructions given to you by others. You have come before the Guru to ask for direction and blessing on a new path in life. With marriage come new responsibilities. Next the Guru instructs the couple on what is required of them. No where in these instructions do you find the Guru saying love the spouse in worldly ways. Instead Guru Sahib speaks of the true relationship of souls. Guru Sahib is saying base this relationship on the soul joining with Vaheguru and not the body (5 elements) or emotions or personality. In the end the relationship the Guru instucts us to build with the wife is the one where Sikhi is at the center; Naam simran, Dharam di Kirt, and Seva, while living as an householder. All this funny business of keeping the wife happy in worldly ways (going to movies, restaurants, weekend escapes to dream land, bedroom fun) is only the mind constructing illusions. Develop a relationship with the wife where both see each other as the Sadhsangat. The next line is simple to understand, but I can go into it later. When more time permits.
  15. I was at an anand karaj at weekend in midlands. Before lava the bride and groom were asked to stand in maharajas hazoori and the registrar asked them to repeat the 'wedding vows'. Then the couple exchanged rings right there while al sangat was sat in darbar hall. Then the anand karaj was performed. I have been thinking about it all weekend. I"m thinking of contacting the Gurdwara to consider holding this farce in another room after the anand karaj. Any thoughts on this...am i making it a big issue for nothing?
  16. Gay marriage is legalized in California. How should Sikhs feel about this? I am confused. I feel happy for them that they are getting equal rights.After all, we as Sikhs have to see everyone equally. On the other hand, what if a gay couple wants to do Anand Karaj? It is not allowed in Sikhi.. Share your views P.S.. I don't want to offend anyone. If this post does not belong this forum, please advise so. Thank you
  17. Gurfateh Sangat Ji, I just came from a local Gurudwara and it was shared with the sangat over there that a North Carolina Gurudwara refused an Anand karaj because the Anand Karaj was for a Hindu family. The sevadar at the same gurdwara went to the committee members and asked to arranged a wedding for his daughter but the memebers turned him away. He wrote to Akal Takht about this matter and still awaiting a response. Can anyone share what Gurughar this is if you know about this as well? Further it was shared with the sangat that what are these people supposed to do if they get turned away from an anand karaj? Where do they go? If they turn to deras then they're blamed for praising the derawad. If they baptize as Sikhs then they're labelled mazhbi Sikhs. The only option they're left with is going to church and accepting a new religion to practice their faith. Please share your views. Gurfateh!
  18. just found this online very interesting http://yespunjab.com/sikh/issues/item/19425-thousands-attend-baba-baljit-singh-daduwal%E2%80%99s-marriage-ceremony
  19. VGJKK VGJKF Jeeo, Help sangat ji!!!! Im a 21 year old amrithdaree girl, and there is a kirtanee singh that I would like to marry. FYI though Im not in love with him and its not kaam because believe me when i say i am not in ANY way physically attracted to this man in any way or form!! it is definitely not lust or love and its not like i couldnt live without him, but when i see this singh and his jeevan and his knowledge (he does gurbanee katha and santhiya after divaans at the local gurdwara) i am in awe and i want to have such a saathi for anand karaj....his face shines and u can tell that this singh has a very good jeevan. anand karaj is about helping each other in the journey towards akal purakh and is about having sangat in my understanding, and i really feel that this singh will be perfect lifetime sangat.... however...my parents want me to marry a singh who is educated and has a good job and not a kirtanee singh or something....i have not mentioned this singh to them in particular but i know they would not approve and they want someone who makes a good earning to run a household... im from a small town in usa and theres not a lot of jeevan vaale singhs and singhanis, theres lots of singhs who are educated and wear dumalle but have no real jeevan. sangat jiyo also please do not say i am too young to be getting married, i am very old fashioned and i would like to get married in my early 20s.. how should i approach this issue? is it wrong for me to think of marrying this singh even though i give u full guarantee that it is not kaami or anything. i took a hukamanama after an ardas and it seems guru sahib approves, i just dont know how to talk to my parents!!! vgjkff vgjkf sangat jeeo
  20. Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh ji, My question: is the kurmai/chunni ceremony Gurmat or Manmat? a lot of times the Kurmai ceremony takes place in Darbar Sahib where Meva (dried fruits and nuts) are put into the palla of the groom to be by the male elders of the girls side. The groom to be is then fed a Shuwara (dried date). The chunni ceremony i dont know much about...involves a chunni hmm lol So how much of this Gurmat? If not, should we continue these blind rituals? Im getting married in a years time. I dont want these brahmanic rituals taking over my wedding. I just want the Anand Karaj obviously followed by Guru Ka Langar. Thats all. no parties, no music and need i say no alcohol or meat. I've not yet attended such a wedding so dont know exactly what goes on, how its done. Can we set a precedent? looking for help and advice please much appreciated! admin ji, i have posted in gupt as i want to remain anonymous. Pul Chuk Maaf ji Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh jiii!!!
  21. Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh ji, I've been attending weddings since ever basically lol typical. But its soon to be my own. So basically someone in the family found/recomended a girl for me to my parents and things got rolling from there. I plan to take Amrit in the near future. I want to get into keeping rehit before i take Amrit so i know i can commit to keeping rehit instead of taking Amrit and then seeing if i can keep it or not. The proposed girl for me is not kesdhari at the moment. I'm hoping here journey will lead her onto this path soon. Now both families are typically punjabi. Hardcore partiers etc. 1) I just want the Anand Karaj to take place, Guru ka Langar and we all go home. I realize this is a dream world fantasy of mine. Does anyone think this could be possible? I dont listen to music, i dont dance drink or eat forbidden food- i dont want all this to take over my own wedding. So can there be a compromise as im pretty sure both families will never agree to a total no party policy. Hows no meat no alcohol and i will not be dancing like a lunitic? Just food, deafening music and people dancing... And when should i make all this clear to the girls family? I think this could potentially be a deal breaker. 2) Is the Kurmai and Chunni ceremony Gurmat? I've seen how the groom is given dried fruits nuts etc in his palla/parna thing and then fed a shuwara/dried date. I don't understand what this represents so am questioning whether this is Gurmat at all. I've seen this take place in the Darbar Sahib. What is this all about? And can I take part in all this? 3) The maiya/mehndi which takes place on the days leading to the wedding. Haldi doh stuff is applied to the groom/bride-to-be. I really dont fancy that. Too intimate and spray on fake tan would do the same job! Pretty sure this is not Gurmat. 4) Groom & Kalgi- this is a no no right? How come this happens all too often? Why is nothing said/explained to sangat before/during the Anand Karaj? And the groom holds a sword- any reason? 5) Can this all work out between me, a kesdhari hoping to soon take Amrit, and a non kesdhari girl? Pul chuk maaf ji.