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gurvir101

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About gurvir101

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    Peevo Pahul Khanday Dhaar
  1. Help marriage issue

    Unfortunately things didnt go well and her family refused to meet me and in the end she decided to stop meeting me too and go with what her parents wanted. I tried to reason and say she should follow what she believes and thinks is right but now thinks that her parents are right for some reason. Maybe she said that to stop me pursuing her. I've just tried to keep busy with work and doing more simran etc. I guess it wasnt meant to be, I have no doubts that Mahraj has his reasons and has a different path for me. Thanks for all of your concern and advice, I appreciate it.
  2. Fremont Sikh wedding brawl

    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh Just came across this story and it made me sick to my stomach. I don't even know what to say, this is what alcohol does to people. Instead of finding Waheguru they find alcohol and "punjabi-ism". They were beating people laying on the ground defenceless because they were drunk and angry. Those that are getting arrested have Singh in their name, bringing bad perceptions onto our community. Something really needs to be done. See this article and then theres a link in there to more information where it says updates http://www.eastbaytimes.com/2017/05/09/police-banquet-hall-brawl-in-fremont-involved-35-50-people-several-injured/
  3. Help marriage issue

    Just an update for you brothers and sisters She spoke to her parents and tried to convince them but they said it would bring too much shame to the family because of my caste. They said she should try to find someone like me but in caste so it is obvious that they approve of me as marriage material just not my caste. They said to her if she does try to marry me they will disown her and not speak to her ever again. She even told them that infact my grandfather and great grandfather owned a farm in india and did not do leather work traditionally associated with chamars, which is true. She argued with them for 3 hours before bursting into tears and calling me to tell me about it. I have left her next decision up to her as i can not tell her to choose me and abandon her family, she must choose me herself else she may begin to resent me for telling her to choose me over her parents. It is a difficult time for me as i must wait to hear her answer as she has asked for a few days to think about it. I am not hopeful as she has been more distant since her discussion with her parents.
  4. Help marriage issue

    I wouldn't want to lie to them, it does not set a good tone for the relationship! But that is a funny thought. There are too many conflicted sikhs in the world, they are almost more punjabi than sikh. Castes is a punjabi thing not a sikh thing and people need to recognise the difference and affiliate themselves with sikhi rather than punjabi traditions. In my opinion, within the next 2/3 generations i see the caste system dissolving as the youth become more educated and see the hypocrisy of being sikh and believing in castes. I see it a lot with my generation so hopefully it continues.
  5. Help marriage issue

    Thank you brothers and sisters for your help. I appreciate having such a wise and caring sangat to give me support in this situation. I am currently working up the courage to talk to my parents about the situation. My parents do not believe in the caste system but they will not want the girl to abandon her family and break a household. I believe we will visit her family and see if any talking can convince them. Maybe if she strongly enforces that she wants to marry me her family will come round. I will keep you updated, and i'll include you all in my prayers thanking you for your help.
  6. Help marriage issue

    @Jacfsing2 forgive me I wasn't clear, I did not mean lie about my caste. I meant I would tell her parents that I am a different caste to them. Only she knows my caste, her parents do not know. I will read up on some other topics in hope they will help. @simran345 thank you for linking the basics of sikhi videos, they are a good resource, I use them quite often. I enjoy listening to the naam simran done for their introduction. It is fustrating because it goes directly against Guru jis teachings. I think the world would be better if more of us took amrit and actually read and followed gurbani.
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