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HarkiranKaur

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About HarkiranKaur

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    Ho Balihaaree Thinn kao Jo Gurmukh Sikhaa

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  1. Scientifically he female should actually be older than the male. I mean if you care about spending the most time together in life as males tend to die earlier age than females. So if a male is 5-10 years younger than the female they will have maximum time together. I know that's not the tradition though as it's seen as the male being older means the female will be easier and more submissive and apt to be controlled by him. Or like my friend who was two years older than the man she wanted to marry and his family called her an old hag. By the way age is just a number.... to a point anyway. Go for it!
  2. Obviously not being Punjabi I am lacking a bit of understanding in the arranged marriage thing. I am assuming there is still a 'get to know each other' period for awhile before the marriage and even if so, if there is no 'love' between the husband and wife and it's just a purely arranged thing, do couples often bypass the wedding night if you know what I mean? I can't imagine being intimate with someone I don't have a connection with emotionally as well. It would be kind of yucky. Like just doing the deed for the sake of doing it and letting a stranger touch you. So do arranged marriage couples often wait after marriage and until they start to love each other, before they you know... consummate it? And please don't think this is a joke question for me it's serious. I guess you could say our marriage was self arranged but we met and spent time together for over a year prior to the wedding and talked every day so we had also an emotional connection that had built already. But we actually married not for love but bwcause we were both looking for the same things... Amritdhari, same goals etc. We both volunteer in community etc. No not so he could get a green card (which Canada does not have anyway) as Chatanga quite rudely suggested.
  3. Another person I'd like to nominate: Bhai Balpreet Singh Ji of World Sikh Organization in Canada. He is legal advocate for WSO and has successfully won the case for kirpans in Quebec, the boys patka case playing soccer, several turban case she including mine and many other Sikh issues nearly all at the national level. He has done so much for awareness of Sikhi!! He regularly speaks at Sikh Kid camps and online and regularly advises Canadian parlaiment.
  4. All I know is I think a fully bearded turbaned Singh looks much more distinguished and stands out than a guy who shaves and looks like a child. I would not have married a clean shaven Singh (aside from the fact that I have taken Amrit). But even still I just find them more attractive in natural form. As for tied or flowing dhari that's a different conversation. Either is fine to me as long as they don't pluck or trim etc. Just like I comb my eyebrows but don't pluck. You can still do basic hygiene and care and you can still shape eyebrows that are natural by an eyebrow brush so they look neat. No need to pluck. Same for a beard. (Luckily I don't have hirsutism like some women but if I did I'd expect my husband to respect me just the same. ) So all you clean shaven Singh's consider growing your beards. Don't be worried that you won't find someone. Almost every Singh here in Kashmir keeps their kesh and ties turban and I'd say 99% of the Sikh population in Kashmir are Amritdhari. None have issues finding a wife
  5. That's why I have 20 years service to my country in the military, in one of the most difficult areas to serve... submarines. I always passed physical test just like any males, and had to be able to fire fight with over 50 lbs gear, turn every valve and react to any other emergencies just like the guys. Down there (below the surface of the ocean) there were no males or females, only crew. There I learned that gender truly does not matter only actions and will. I thought Sikhi was the same. For the one who mentioned Gurmat, I will point out what my husband found: And this is what is in Sikh Rehet Maryada: hint look at Article XXIV para b. Second last sentence... Therefore I am not trying to change anything at all. Neither does SGGSJ say anything about one gender having privilege over the other. Taksali Rehet Maryada (male centric) is for Taksalis. Nihang Rehet Maryada is for Nihangs (including Jhatka). AKJ Rehet Maryada (with sarbloh bibek, keski, equality etc) is for AKJs. Sikh Rehet Maryada is for the bulk of the panth. Those of you who feel it was forced on you then choose your favourite jatha and be done with it. Those of you who say it was forced on the panth seem to want to do the exact same thing with the taksali Maryada and force that one on the panth? There is a word for that and it begins with H. Remember Hari Singh Randhawa? He got a taste of what happens when taksali Maryada is forced on a sangat who don't want it. That should be enough of a clue that it's not set to be a 'panthic' Maryada. So if you want to follow it then follow it. But please don't disrespect the panthic Rehet Maryada in the process.
  6. Here is why it matters: atma is genderless - agree? life is impermanent and this body is false - agree? (Meaning you can't take your <banned word filter activated> with you) Given that other species procreate asexually, it's known humans reproduce sexually to prevent genetic abnormalities since we are more complex. Hindus believe someone is born female as punishment for past deeds, must serve males for minimum 6 more lifetimes before being born male and being able to advance. our Gurus killed this idea saying this HUMAN body is precious and every human has opportunity to merge back with Creator. if the atma residing in the body is not being punished to be the gender they are, and the atma is genderless and every one is the same divine light then how can those souls in female bodies have to experience punishment while in this life? You have to then say why. Also, by saying ALL Sikhs must strive to take Amrit and saying that only males can initiate others then you are basically saying that those souls inhabiting frmale bodies are inherently lower avastha than those in male bodies. Because females would have to entirely rely on males for their spiritual advancement. This speaks as to something being wrong with female bodies or at the very least treating female bodies like a child compared to an adult in spiritual matters. You can't get around the fact that it means souls in female bodies are seen as lower. But doesn't Gurbani say that every human is equal and all contain the same divine light equally? How can souls in male bodies be higher spiritually speaking then? By sayng women can't do this seva you are saying women can't progress spiritually on their own and require males to pull them along. Nothing like being made to feel inadequate! Imagine that for a moment that the body you ended up with is defective and seen as a vehicle that will break down and never get you to the destination unless towed along by the opposite gender.
  7. They didn't say women 'should be' rather they said women ARE allowed. And to not let anyone tell us otherwise. These were five Singh's too! Yes there were Amrit sanchars here with Kaur's as Panj Pyaras. Don't worry we will get you photo but does it matter? You'll just say who cares it was following SRM anyway and then dismiss it. By the way your mouth could use some soap. Your mother should have taught you better manners than to resort to name calling years ago. Notice I still have not called you any names? And I will never stoop to your low level either. And bye you won't get any fans for Charitropakhyan in this part of India.
  8. Jhatka is not the only issue in the jatha of which you speak. Issue of strict sarbloh bibek as well. But not all Kaur's who tie a dastaar belong to that jatha. Though all Kaur's from that jatha have to. There are taksali and nihang Kaur's who also tie dastars and even many of us who don't follow any specific jatha at all. But the kesh I spoke of was not regular thin skin hairs. Many Kaur's have darker thicker hairs on chin or upper lip. Following Rehet Maryada they can not remove these. Would these same Singh's who complain about women not choosing turban wearing bearded Singh's, have no issue choosing a Kaur with a hint of a moustache or some chin hairs? I think there can be easily a double standard here. I think ALL of be turban tying Singhnis with some facial hairs would have NO issues what so ever with marrying a bearded and turban wearing singh. But will the Singh's choose those Kaurs?
  9. I don't hate anyone. I just hurt inside when I see Singh's come up with any and all excuses to give their sisters, daughters, Mothers less rights than they have simply because of something which one has no control over. I don't feel hatred I feel sad and upset. I feel frustrated and hurt. Especially when on one hand Sikhi touts itself being a religion (the only religion) which has equity but when you really look it doesn't. Males still have privilege not just in jathas which won't allow women to do seva as Panj Pyaras but also keep them from gurdwara management, keep them from seva during time of the month, perpetuate the idea that a wife is subordinate to and must serve her husband (while he enjoys the privilege of higher position over her and doesn't have to serve her). Women are kept from kirtan at Darbar Sahib and I know of some absolutely beautiful female kirtanis who's voices would hit anyone in their heart with such emotion for Waheguru. Women are kept from Granthi positions at Darbar Sahib and most other Gurdwaras as well. Also ishnan seva. Sikh girls last year were kicked out of a nagar kirtan parade as nishanshis police called to remove them and the police were told 'girls are not allowed to do this'. If you all believe in equality why does this all happen? Why is Sikh Rehet Maryada and Gurbani not enough? Why does one persons opinion from a specific jatha (ddt) hold so much weight over panthic decision and Gurbani on these issues? So no I hate nobody. I have never even called anyone names. Only you guys have. I only feel hurt and seen as lesser by Singh's because of something I had no control over, my gender and it's not even something I can change like if I do something wrong I can fix it and improve but I can't change my gender. So if it's bad to be female or itsbsomehownlesser in Waheguru eyes then how did I end up this way and why and how can I fix it? Is it punishment? If the divine light is in all equally then why can't everyone be treated equally and not have statuses that are related to things they can't control like gender? As soon as we start to put people in hierarchies based on birth then we are no better than Hindus with caste are we? I do not hate anyone. I feel devastated when I see these things. I have never had venom for anyone rathe ryou guys have all had for me because of Chatanga and what he had siad and because I pointed out what Sikh Rehet Maryada says? I still have not even called Chatanga any names for what he did but have you noticed how many names I have been called in just the last 24 hours on here? And my comments on 3HO still stand. I have seen members using yoga mats with Gurbani and they are sitting and stretching and doing tantric couple yoga on that.
  10. Did I say anything about who is a Sikh? I just commented on their practices of yoga with backs to SGGSJ. I wish everyone would stop just assuming since I believe in equality that it makes me somehow inept in everything Sikhi. How would you feel? Check yourself...
  11. Even worse they dance like trance dancing to Gurbani... I'd say that is beadbi for sure as is doing yoga teaching classes in Darbar with backs to palki Sahib.
  12. I never said Jarnail Singh said anything about impurity. I said DDT teaches that (see the bits about women and seva during menstruation and especially the huge hari singh randhawa controversy in Canada). I never said he said that...Rather I said that he would have been brought up in that philosophy. Don't put words in my mouth!!!! second my husband does speak Punjabi and we do nitnem etc together. He tells me the English meanings. I already refuted Jarnail singhs reasoning... to say that women for all time should be punished for what a few that day did or did not do is not a good reason. It was not a competition of genders. Secondly the atma is genderless and we don't choose which gender we are born. Discriminating because of gender is no different than discriminating because of caste. People should be judged on their actions and not their genitals (nor on the actions or inactions of others who happened to have the same genitals) Also if women are to be barred because 'none gave their head' that day then anyone from castes who did not give their heads should also be barred, also what about white men, black men? No white or black men gave heir heads that day. Men with different names? Different heights? From different places?? Nobody has ever answered why is it only gender which matters??? Especially when the atma is genderless! You are just another nasty name calling person with an agenda. You can't do anything but name call and parrot one video. The real reason is your own chauvinism. According to SRM women ARE in Panj Pyaras!!!!! You actually think that because you have the same gentials it makes you better and more superior to do that seva? YOU were not there to give your head either that day. But just because you happened to be born with the same genitals it makes you good to go?? It's about avastha and the light within NOT the genitals!!!! But Jarnail Singh could only speak for damdami taksal anyway. And even he upheld the SRM while at Harmandir Sahib. SRM says straight out that women as well as men can do that seva (and any other). You might not agree with it but that is just your own opinion. Instead of parroting one video where he gives HIS opinion why not try to resolve it with Gurbani yourself?? Would our Guru hold grudges against anyone with a certain genitals or would he rather judge someone on their own actions? I can easily understand what shabads are saying when my husband tells me the English translation. The context are easily seen.
  13. I'd like to put fwd LCOL (ret) now MInister of National Defence Harjit Singh Sajjan. He was commanding officer of BC regiment exactly 100 years after that regiment stopped the passengers from Komagata Maru (mostly Sikhs) from coming ashore. He served Canada's military with distinction including in Afghanistan twice. He also helped me when I fought for Sikh women to be able to tie turban in uniform in Canada's military. Prior it was only males allowed. I won the case and become first female Sikh to tie turban in the Royal Canadian navy because of his help.